aguyconfused Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 My girlfriend and I have been dating for over 1 year. I was about to go home to visit my family, that live several states away for a week. I invite her along and she tells me she wants to go along, the week before I am suppose to go, she pulls out and tells me she does not want to go with no reason. I am crushed and a little mad because my family was looking forward to seeing her; mainly because this is the first girl I would have ever brought home for them to meet. Then the day before I leave she calls me and wants to break up, her reasoning is she is not going to have time to spend with me. So going back home I am a bit down, I call her when I get back trying to work things out and she agrees to spend every other weekend doing something together. By this time I find out my job is being outsourced to another company, but they don’t know exactly when my last day will be, so I am trying to deal with finding a new job as soon as I can. Things are going ok as far as I can tell its hard only talking to each other 10 minutes on the phone and once a month get together to do something. Then I found a job I really wanted and get turned down, plus I get the news that I have 45 days left before I am with out a job and now my girlfriend tells me its not working out and wants to breakup again, of course over the phone. So needless to say my week was shot. She still wanted to be friends and hang out from time to time. OK I am an idiot but I have still have feelings for her. She still wants to be friends and do things from time to time. After this I start looking at any jobs no matter where they are located within my company. My roommate just happen to say something to me about a job I applied for in another state, (now my Ex) is standing right there, and asked me about it, when she finds out that it is out of state she flips out saying I cannot move out of the area. I point blank ask her why because I have to find something, she comes back with well there are other jobs in the area I could apply for. I look at her and tell her that if I have to keep a job it means I might have to move there is no choice. My roommate and I were confused as to why this would bother her so much. All of a sudden now she is finding all kinds of time almost every weekend she wants to hang out going to the movies or what ever. I have an iguana as a pet, they have sharp claws if you don’t keep then trimmed, well it had been awhile since I trimmed them and he scratched my hand a couple of places. My Ex asked me where I got those scratches and like a smartass that I am said oh my girlfriend gave them too me, she literally stopped dead in her tracks and gave me the weirdest look I have ever seen. I then told her the truth and her face was like that of relief. I asked her why she was so surprised because it had been 6 months since we dated, she would not answer my question at all. My family comes into town and visits for a few days. She asks me if she could meet them, I explained we are probably going to be doing several things but we would see. Mainly I just did not want to tell her I would only introduce someone who I am dating to my parents not an EX. Can someone please explain to me what might be going through her head? My roommate and friends are all confused as I am; BTW I have since found a job in the area. I just need someone else’s view point, like a woman that can maybe explain to a guy what a woman is thinking about. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 She wants to keep you on the back burner, and get all the benefits of being your girlfriend without actually having to be your girlfriend. Here is some advice I gave to someone whose girlfriend wanted to be 'friends': Emotional 'no contact' Link to post Share on other sites
Sckott Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 Yeah. Straight-up it sounds like a girl that isn't sure of what she wants, but she's afraid of losing most anything. Her behavior is such that, even if something romantic built up, she doesn't seem very stable and that's not something you need right now. You need trust and stability. She's given you shoddy answers and she has rarely come through. She's bad news. Link to post Share on other sites
Author aguyconfused Posted April 8, 2005 Author Share Posted April 8, 2005 Oh yes we are just friends not FWB. We don't hold hands or anything of this nature. I talked to a female co-worker and was thinking she wants to keep me around but doesnt want the GF status. We are just going to movies, mall, church things like this. Link to post Share on other sites
Skullcrusher Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 Play with her, screw her, whatever you may think she isn't serious about you. Link to post Share on other sites
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