Why does a guy cheat even if he has a pretty girlfriend?

[lily999]

I had been fooled by a guy for nearly a year. And today I found out he actually does have a girlfriend! His girlfriend is pretty but he started to cheat on her with me when their relationship was just 4 months:lmao:

 

I can think of some reasons:

 

1. bad sex

2. he wants more diversity

3. she not giving him enough attention or love

[BaileyB]

Does it matter? He's not a good guy... I wouldn't think twice about him.

[ChickiePops]

Pretty isn't everything. Is the girl funny? Intelligent? A good companion? Fun to be with? Is she shallow? Is she mean?

 

Need more info here. Pretty can only get you so far..you still have to have substance.

 

Or he's just a selfish douche who wants doesn't give a crap about anyone but himself.

[spiderowl]

Some guys will just cheat whoever they are with. They are despicable really because they are exposing their present girlfriends to the risk of disease. Don't assume he had a reason other than that he has no proper boundaries in his life.

 

Sorry you got caught by someone like this. These people harm others, however they justify their behaviour to themselves.

[Dis]

I just got cheated on by a guy who had a less attracive woman in his bed

 

I'm very pretty, sweet, compassionate, fun, loving, smart etc etc

 

Who knows why men do this

 

But dont contribute to this woman's pain...just because she's pretty doesnt mean she doesnt have feelings...dont hate just because she's prettier than you....she may also have a better personality than you...funnier..smarter....sweeter than you....who knows

 

Sometimes guys cheat on women who are the whole entire package

 

At the end of the day this guys a douche

 

You need to be a girl's girl and walk away

[lily999]

Pretty isn't everything. Is the girl funny? Intelligent? A good companion? Fun to be with? Is she shallow? Is she mean?

 

Need more info here. Pretty can only get you so far..you still have to have substance.

 

Or he's just a selfish douche who wants doesn't give a crap about anyone but himself.

 

Once he admitted that he was seeing someone, but didn't recognize her as his girlfriend. (Today I figured out his real name and found out they have been in a relationship since August, 2015). He said that girl he was "seeing" was acting like a child. I think he is just a selfish jerk who just wants to play around

[Dis]

Also...its a bad idea to find humor in another woman's pain

 

Your future man may cheat on you...but with a prettier woman

 

The script can always be flipped

[Ruby Slippers]

Some people just like to cheat. I'd drop him like a hot potato. If he'll do it to another woman, he'll do it to you. It's his nature.

[Redhead14]

I had been fooled by a guy for nearly a year. And today I found out he actually does have a girlfriend! His girlfriend is pretty but he started to cheat on her with me when their relationship was just 4 months:lmao:

 

I can think of some reasons:

 

1. bad sex

2. he wants more diversity

3. she not giving him enough attention or love

 

Lily, I find it interesting that you are so aloof after having found out that the guy you were dating for a year deceived you too and now are more or less, pointing out possible faults with the girlfriend that may justify his cheating. As in she somehow deserved it. She is a sista, we should respect each other. You wouldn't want to be in her shoes either.

 

This is classic deflection and avoidance and a form of denial. Please take care of yourself.

 

Beyond that, there is no excuse for cheating and he is a jerk so you've dodged a bullet!

[lily999]

Some guys will just cheat whoever they are with. They are despicable really because they are exposing their present girlfriends to the risk of disease. Don't assume he had a reason other than that he has no proper boundaries in his life.

 

Sorry you got caught by someone like this. These people harm others, however they justify their behaviour to themselves.

 

The entire time, he was lying to me and leading me on.. He made me fall in love with him so hard. If he was honest with me and told me he is in a relationship already I wouldn't have wasted so much time and emotions on him...Stupid me

[JewelD]

Your initial post does seem like you're gloating a bit. I wouldn't feel very happy about it. You both got played, but you were the secret.

[lily999]

Lily, I find it interesting that you are so aloof after having found out that the guy you were dating for a year deceived you too and now are more or less, pointing out possible faults with the girlfriend that may justify his cheating. As in she somehow deserved it. She is a sista, we should respect each other. You wouldn't want to be in her shoes either.

 

This is classic deflection and avoidance and a form of denial. Please take care of yourself.

 

Beyond that, there is no excuse for cheating and he is a jerk so you've dodged a bullet!

 

 

Sigh, I was thinking how to believe a man again

To me the girl seems so nice, he just started to cheat on her when they had been together for only a few months, and it was still on honeymoon stage. My intention wasn't try to figure what her faults are, I was just curious and it is hard for me to believe a man again

I feel sorry for her and we are both victims.

[lily999]

Your initial post does seem like you're gloating a bit. I wouldn't feel very happy about it. You both got played, but you were the secret.

 

Yes I feel very bad and hurt by him. He is a ****ing liar and cheater

[Redhead14]

Sigh, I was thinking how to believe a man again

To me the girl seems so nice, he just started to cheat on her when they had been together for only a few months, and it was still on honeymoon stage. My intention wasn't try to figure what her faults are, I was just curious and it is hard for me to believe a man again

I feel sorry for her and we are both victims.

 

You are not a victim. Get out of that mentality. You are a survivor! You're gonna be fine. Don't give this guy anymore of your time and emotion. Go ahead and grieve but do it a little at a time. Take some time each day to sit with your emotions and then force yourself do something, anything else that takes your thoughts and focus away from him.

 

They cheat because they are shallow, selfish, immoral people without a conscience. They aren't worthy of a woman's love. This guy sure isn't worthy of yours.

 

Be well, take good care of yourself, be good to yourself. Go out and buy yourself something you've been wanting. Buy new curtains, buy new pictures/knick knacks and replace old ones in your apartment. Change/spruce up your surroundings.

[AMJ]

A friend of mine is a serial cheater. He cheated on his first wife a few months into their marriage and then married the woman he cheated with a year after the divorce....and now THAT marriage is ending because he cheated and I think he's dating the next one too. Both of these women were really beautiful, and smart. I was friends with his first wife but didn't bother to get to know the second because...I can only be so nice about all this, you know? Plus I figured she'd not be around that long.

 

Anyway why does he cheat- he cheats because he has a low self esteem and constantly needs recognition or attention from women. He's been that way since junior high.

[h0000]

Number 1 is usually the answer. A lot of times, those pretty girls are nice to look at, but aren't as good in the bedroom. Meanwhile, a more average looking girl works much harder to please a guy.

 

But men wouldn't break up with the nice but dull in bed girl to be with the average but freaky in bed girl?

[lily999]

A friend of mine is a serial cheater. He cheated on his first wife a few months into their marriage and then married the woman he cheated with a year after the divorce....and now THAT marriage is ending because he cheated and I think he's dating the next one too. Both of these women were really beautiful, and smart. I was friends with his first wife but didn't bother to get to know the second because...I can only be so nice about all this, you know? Plus I figured she'd not be around that long.

 

Anyway why does he cheat- he cheats because he has a low self esteem and constantly needs recognition or attention from women. He's been that way since junior high.

 

Yeah. This guy seems insecure and wants the attention and caring from women

[lily999]

You are not a victim. Get out of that mentality. You are a survivor! You're gonna be fine. Don't give this guy anymore of your time and emotion. Go ahead and grieve but do it a little at a time. Take some time each day to sit with your emotions and then force yourself do something, anything else that takes your thoughts and focus away from him.

 

They cheat because they are shallow, selfish, immoral people without a conscience. They aren't worthy of a woman's love. This guy sure isn't worthy of yours.

 

Be well, take good care of yourself, be good to yourself. Go out and buy yourself something you've been wanting. Buy new curtains, buy new pictures/knick knacks and replace old ones in your apartment. Change/spruce up your surroundings.

 

Thanks for your nice words and I will try to move on and I know it is hard at the beginning. I am still confused

[Gr8fuln2020]

I think that there's a much more simple answer having nothing to do with personal qualities or what not....they want to have sex with as many people as they can while not at all interested in settling. Please. This is especially true with younger, mostly, men. Man guys are not ready to commit, so play the field.

[longjohn]

I had been fooled by a guy for nearly a year. And today I found out he actually does have a girlfriend! His girlfriend is pretty but he started to cheat on her with me when their relationship was just 4 months:lmao:

 

I can think of some reasons:

 

1. bad sex

2. he wants more diversity

3. she not giving him enough attention or love

 

Irrelevant, he's a scumbag for cheating on her and lying to you. I hope you told her so he gets no one.

[lily999]

Irrelevant, he's a scumbag for cheating on her and lying to you. I hope you told her so he gets no one.

 

I messaged her today but she didn't really believe what I said.

She asked me to give her proof but I had deleted all his emails and texts(he used texts applications to text me), then she said I was bull****ting.

 

She wasn't so smart and so insensitive, that was why he could cheat on her so many times

[Woggle]

Some people are just cheaters it doesn't matter who they are with.

[AMJ]

I think that there's a much more simple answer having nothing to do with personal qualities or what not....they want to have sex with as many people as they can while not at all interested in settling. Please. This is especially true with younger, mostly, men. Man guys are not ready to commit, so play the field.

 

I disagree with this. Guys who want to simply play the field just don't commit. It takes a lot of work to hide a relationship from a significant other. Cheaters are a different more self-centered type of person.

[longjohn]

I messaged her today but she didn't really believe what I said.

She asked me to give her proof but I had deleted all his emails and texts(he used texts applications to text me), then she said I was bull****ting.

 

She wasn't so smart and so insensitive, that was why he could cheat on her so many times

 

You always need proof. I kept proof on my now ex wife (wife at the time) just so I could prove without any doubt to the other woman that her husband was cheating on her with my then wife. As expected she denied it but later admitted to me she knew he was up to something.

 

Who knows your text alone might have been enough to cast doubt in her mind and get her putting 2 and 2 together. I really believe some people can't help but cheat and lie. Many believing their own lies! Some of these people I've no doubt go on to become politicians

[Dis]

Your initial post does seem like you're gloating a bit. I wouldn't feel very happy about it. You both got played, but you were the secret.

 

Yes....I agree.

 

OP, you're forgetting she wasnt the only one who was fooled by him...you were too....you were the one he was hiding from everyone....at least his family and friends probably knew all about her

 

You were a dirty little secret he had hidden...like a stiff sock under his bed...while she sprawled out ontop of it....you have no reason to be proud/cocky