aconfusedgirl Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Hello!! So I met this guy at the start of last year. He is my boyfriend now but there are some things that make me think... When we just met, he came off as desperate, saying how lonely he is and he was heart broken over a fling. (He chased some girl he knew but she led him on and didn't have feelings for him.) After a week of talking, he asked me to be his girlfriend but I said no, I would still like to get to know eachother. After 1 month he said he would marry me. Well long story short, I told him that I would just like to be friends. So we remained friends for 10 months. It was a nice time honestly despite the way we started off. During these 10 months, he actually didn't turn out to be all that bad as I first saw him as (a desperate guy looking to rebound) he's actually pretty independent, wise and supportive. We had alot of fun and happy times as friends, we got to know eachother more. As more months went by, he became my best friend. In november we began to fall for each other romantically. Then we decided to take it to the next level and become boyfriend and girlfriend. Honestly it's the best relationship I ever had... but there's one thing I struggle to understand and don't know how to bring up to him. He keeps saying he wants to marry me. But I believe we should be together longer to consider marriage. And I believe we should be financially and emotionally stable as well. I'm 9 years younger than him, currently finishing college, so maybe it is because of his age that he keeps bringing up marriage? I don't want to rush things... Sometimes I am afraid that I cannot fulfill his needs if I don't say I want to get married. Our relationship is a happy and honest one but... this marriage thing, I'm not sure how to feel and I am not sure how to talk to him about this... I told him we should not rush into marriage but he keeps bringing it up... Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 It's OK darling this always happens during the honeymoon stage of a relationship....it lasts between 6 month to a year and a half. It's not unusual to talk about forever, marriage, naming your kids, etc. It's just infatuation doing the talking for now. Just be honest with him that you would like to wait a year before making any plans. Probably by then things will die down, and his head will be out of the clouds, thinking a little more clearly. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Just tell him what you told us: that you prefer to table discussions about marriage until you graduate & get stabilized in a job. If he can't accept that, walk away. Don't marry him until you are ready. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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