How can I find out if this is a relationship worth fighting for?

[deesw8]

I am 30, female, I met this man about five years ago, because of work and other life problems i was having, therefore, though he and I clearly had a genuine connection, he showed interest then and so did i, I sort of put my feeling in the back burner, and I realize he is not the type I may end up marrying anyway so during this time I saw other people but I realized at the end I was lying to myself, no one really made me feel the connection I had with him. He moved to another country a year ago, and then, I dropped him an email hinting that I had feelings for him. He didn't respond to this, which hurts me a lot even though I realize he is probably trying to be careful, he has a career in media and he has a lot of people who just wanna use him, etc. I just recently heard that, for work he maybe back in a another city close to me; I have very deep regrets about not making an effort to meet up with him while he was here, I am very torn about it, because though nothing started with us, I do want to give it a try to meet up and figure out what it could be, yet, I am not sure if I have the courage to initiate anything, as his silence already hurted me. this is a situation I never encountered in my life. Please help.

[yxalitis]

I am 30, female, I met this man about five years ago, because of work and other life problems i was having, therefore, though he and I clearly had a genuine connection, he showed interest then and so did i, I sort of put my feeling in the back burner, and I realize he is not the type I may end up marrying anyway so during this time I saw other people but I realized at the end I was lying to myself, no one really made me feel the connection I had with him. He moved to another country a year ago, and then, I dropped him an email hinting that I had feelings for him. He didn't respond to this, which hurts me a lot even though I realize he is probably trying to be careful, he has a career in media and he has a lot of people who just wanna use him, etc. I just recently heard that, for work he maybe back in a another city close to me; I have very deep regrets about not making an effort to meet up with him while he was here, I am very torn about it, because though nothing started with us, I do want to give it a try to meet up and figure out what it could be, yet, I am not sure if I have the courage to initiate anything, as his silence already hurted me. this is a situation I never encountered in my life. Please help.

1. Please use shorter sentences

2. What relationship? You never had one to fight for.

Let it, and him, go.

[hippychick3]

If he didn't respond to you, he isn't interested.

 

You can't have a relationship without both parties wanting one.

 

There's nothing for you to regret. If he wanted you, he would have contacted you or at the very bare minimum replied to your communication attempt.

 

Move on.

[basil67]

Before you get hurt about him not replying to your email, do you know if

 

a) his email address is current

b) he saw the email

c) he is interested in a long distance thing (how close is the city he's moved to?)

d) he is available

 

It's also entirely possible that he got really hurt when you weren't interested in him earlier and sees your attempt now as 'too little, too late'.

[deesw8]

Thank you, yes I see your logic, maybe i wasn't' clear, but he actually responded to my first email, but then not to the later two, I always had the hunch he is interested but he is too scared to do something about it for his reputation, his work is very important for him.

[ExpatInItaly]

He's not interested like that anymore. You'd have heard back from him by now if he wanted to see you again. For all you know, he might not even be single anymore.

 

And as another poster pointed out, there wasn't a relationship to fight for here.

 

Sorry OP, but I would move on.