Why would he say this? Am I really that special?

[Fruitee]

Long story short. I was in a bad relationship. Ended it for good about 1 month ago. Wasnt really looking for anyone. Wanted to have nice evening out. Met this guy in Tinder. Decided to go out with him. Now we have met 4 times. And been texting for couple of weeks. He said he has been alone for some time. Is looking for relationship. I kinda like him even he is kinda stupid sometimes.

 

So this week we got into argument. Well actually it was me who lost her nerve and acted like an idiot. And then I said some bad things to him. Later I regretted and said Im sorry.

 

The thing Im wondering is. When I said I am sorry he told me that he dont usually do this (giving people 2nd chances after they act / do like I did). And I havent proved to him to be gf material (he is right). That he is waiting for things to get better. But he will give me another chance and he would like me to be his gf (in the future). That he put his pride aside and let it pass.

 

What Im thinking is. Ok. In relationships people fight. In the beginning you try to be your best. He was right. I was total b*tch towards him. And he is very proud guy.

 

But am I really that special that he would just give me another chance or is it some kind of power play (to put me in my place)? He must like me to do so. Im not sure what the question here is. Im just confused.

[Wewon]

 

So this week we got into argument. Well actually it was me who lost her nerve and acted like an idiot. And then I said some bad things to him. Later I regretted and said Im sorry.

 

 

Okay, I'm sure that you can guess where this is going...what "bad things" did you say exactly. This is too important to gloss over with a generality.

 

Insulting his mother is one thing, telling him that he drives too fast is another. Some things simply can't get a pass and other things can be laughed off.

 

Without this information its a little difficult to know if he is overreacting or if you truly crossed a line and he is struggling to let it pass.

[basil67]

Not all relationships have fights. Good relationships discuss problems in a civil manner and find a solution without ending up fighting.

 

Anyway, him giving you another chance isn't necessarily because you're special or he's doing a power play. It could be because he was in a forgiving mood. Or he was a bit lonely. Or he's trying a different approach to life. Or because he wants to have sex with you. Or because he thinks that perhaps he contributed to the issue.

 

Only he knows the answer. Trying to guess why he's doing it is fruitless.

[Fruitee]

Well we have different cultural backgrounds and it is a discussion where we clash sometimes. Because I cant understand him and he dont understand me.

 

He was in my place having dinner and then freaked out and was rude to me. So I asked him to leave. In his opinion I kicked him out. Im my opinion he was rude to me. We were able to talk it through.

 

Im thinking is that maybe the cultural difference is too big. And the next day after the dinner I decided to text him. Which I dont usually do. When I have been to dates and something goes wrong that has been it. But I really liked this guy.

 

Eventually he did answer me. And was like ok I appreciate your text but it dont change anything. Later I send another one and then he was like ok lets try again.

 

Yesterday he told me like it is first time for him to let something like this pass and I need to deal with my sh*t and problems and improve myself and life and decide what is it that I want and he is waiting for things to get better.

 

I dont know if he was in forgiving mood. We have agreed not to have sex. But he said that when someone genuily asks for another chance he will give it.

 

Of course mature people talk etc. But I also thought that he would have understood what Im going through. I didnt insult his mom. It was more about his personality and his behaviour.