Have you ever had to choose between a mother or a boyfriend?

[summerlove]

Have you ever had to choose between a mother or a boyfriend?

 

Last night i was furious with my bf of 1 1/2 years because his 21st b-day is tues and he has been drinking very night this week and showing up at my house at 4 am. I am in the middle of finals and i had warned him several times that he better not show up at 4am again and been drinking or my mother would be handling it! Well it happened again he came to my house at 4am last night woke me and my sisters up and plus his so un bare able , loud ,when he comes over at that time of night.he wants to wrestle and joke around. I'm tired and tired of him only paying attention to me at nights only. I'm tired of hearing about how his almost 21 and so well last night we got into it bad i ended up going to get my mother to ask him to leave and well she got up and did. after he got up and put his shoes on and started to leave cursing and saying "**** u and your mother", now this is a guy that say many things he does not mean. i asked him if he really meant that and he didn't reply. he was so up set that he too began to cry. i took his keys cause i did not want him driving home with all upset and well it was a bad situation. he laid down and we both fell asleep, me crying.

This morning i a woke and took my mother to the mall cause she wanted to Christmas shop cause she can't drive. anyways i dropped her off and came too work. i stayed a work until 6 and then went to pick her up. when i got there she was being all hateful telling me i had an adittude cause of my bf and that he wasn't welcome anymore. and that if he shows up at that time of night again that she would be handling by escorting him out and if nothing more calling the police. it seems to me that she was trying to make me mad! how could your own mother tell you that she was going to call the cops of the other half that you love? doesn't make sense? she seems to be making me now choose between her and my bf. she has nothing to say or anything. she is just a total bitch. i said if i know you were going to act like this i would of never asked for you help when i needed so don't worry i'll never ask again. she simply went off rambling telling me how stupid i was and blah blah blah............

Can you really hate your own mother?

[innocntlisy1981]

i think ur mum had a rite to be angry but i also think she should butt out and mind her own business this is not her problem it is urs and she is only making it harder.ur boyfriend needs a kick up thja ass for saying that lol.sit down and talk to them both this needs to be sorted rite away as it only makes things harder and like it or not parents have a big influence on there childrens lifes and she can make this quite a difficult sittuation take care good luck

[Queen B]

I can understand why you're upset, it suck to have 2 important people in your life at odds.

 

This post got me thinking what would my mom have done if a guy showed up to my house liken that when I was living with her? I think her reaction would be similar I mean if someoen comes into her house drunk and tells her to f**k off...that person wouldn't be welcome in her house anymore....and now I don't think I could blame her.

 

It could be that your mom is really concerned about you...obviously your BF has problems respecting your limits and space if he shows up and wakes the whole house up at 4 am, especially after you have asked him not to. What's next? What if he happens to get violent with you guys when he's drunk? While your mom may not be showing it maybe she's worried that you'll get hurt and that kind of fear can make moms behave very strangely.

 

I think maybe she's trying to protect you. Maybe she's been in an abusive relationship with someoen that drinks and can see the writing on the wall? You need to have a serious talk with your BF, if he is almost 21 he's not acting like it and should be ashamed about his behaviour. Your mom and your family deserve nothihng less than an apology for his 4AM nonsense.