samantha303 Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 I have been going out with my boyfriend for a year now. Three years ago, I moved to a new city. I have been handling anxiety problems since then and kind of just pushed my friends away from my life somehow. Since our relationship started, I have not been happy half of the time. I think my bf has a lot of expectations on me. He always talks about how few friends I have, how s**t my job is, and the fact that I don't have fancy hobbies. I grew up poor, always have a lot of stress from family, and can't afford to pay for fancy hobbies. The only hobby i can afford is teaching myself how to draw and it is totally free. He is the opposite. He came from a rich background. He is smart, has a great job which pays well and he admitted that he;s never had any trouble in his life. I usually got really upset with him when he made comments like 'I can't understand why you can't get a job at company XYZ, they are not difficult to get in!' or 'Do you not have friends at all? Does nobody like you?' etc. And obviously he thinks they are merely jokes. Now he's changed a bit and know how not to make hurtful comments, but I still feel really bad about myself whenever I'm with him. I think I'm not good enough, I think I am bad at everything. Sometimes I cried for a long time when he ditched me for his frds. It's like he got into my head, he made me think that no one likes me so he is the only one who i can hang out with. I don;t know whether it's naive to want to have someone who loves me for being me. He said he was joking but i think he does think im beneath him otherwise he wouldnt even joke about it. Im not happy in my relationship anymore but I do love him. I feel horrible and I don't know what to do.
Silly Girl924 Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 If I were you, I'd stay single for a while. Maybe read some self help books, and learn to love yourself. There's no greater love than self love and only with that can you truly come to love another person. I'm not saying you don't love this man, but maybe he isn't for you. No offense to you, but a person stable enough for a relationship would def kick him to the curb for such a lack of respect. If you do this, I'd thank him for making you realize that you are yourself and you're going to be the best you possible. And then tell him not to hit his *** on his way out the door. Good luck. 2
Ruby Slippers Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 Your boyfriend is a jerk. He does see you as beneath him and enjoys treating you as inferior. You don't need that energy in your life, especially not during a harder time. If I were you, I would break up with him and focus on my own life - being healthy and happy, making friends, and working to resolve the anxiety problems. 1
TouchedByViolet Posted January 21, 2015 Posted January 21, 2015 Breakup with this guy and find someone who supports you. You need a guy who will have your back and help you grow. Not someone who brings you down 1
regine_phalange Posted January 22, 2015 Posted January 22, 2015 If you want to be happy you need to be with people who don't make you unhappy. Life is short! 2
preraph Posted January 22, 2015 Posted January 22, 2015 He's being a jackass and people usually do that to elevate themselves. Makes him feel better to find someone he can call inadequate in some way. Take comfort that this means he is actually the one with the bigger issues of lack of self-worth, arrogant though he may act. It's overcompensation. He's eroding your self-esteem and you'd be better off without him. You are only one among millions who didn't grow up rich or have all the advantages and who aren't maybe the most social people around, but most of them are leading perfectly good lives. Get away from him and get busy being your best self. The more progress you make, your self-esteem will go back up from even the small everyday accomplishments. As it is, now if you accomplished something, he'd probably try to take credit for it as if he prodded you into it. Who needs that? 1
Heatemyheart89 Posted January 22, 2015 Posted January 22, 2015 Hello , I would get rid of this guy and start working on you . Join a meetup group or try to re-connect with old friends , then you can work on finding a supportive partner .Best of luck to you .
Purepony Posted January 22, 2015 Posted January 22, 2015 Your bf is a certified grade A scumbag! I would leave him if I where you and start being happy again.
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