Women Not Texting Back to a Direct Question.....Highly Irritating

[mrgoodcat]

I'm feeling mostly past it, but still slightly bit frustrated. Got to be one of the worst things women do. I don't care if some woman and I hook up or not, but not returned text is one of the rudest things. Even a mellow lie or a harsh "I don't like you" beats total ignore on the text. Answering is polite. Like Nike's lame tag line goes, just "f*%king do it".

 

In my last threat this young single mom who I felt care for did not even bother replying to me initially or to my last message(I only sent 3 messages to her, last one asking if I'm imposing with my whole friendship and that I don't want to stress her out). Basically, I gave her an open way out or she could say that she's thinking about it. Or that I'm not mature or she's too busy in life for any relationships. I can go on. I mean, I'm gonna eventually run into her somewhere in the building, so I don't understand how this at all. Rejecting me would be less awkward than just flat out ignoring me.

 

I've deleted her number from my contacts and will never contact her again. Women who show me disregard, I don't ever take seriously again, so maybe that was her end-goal, but that's a poor way of achieving that. If anything, it creates a more negative feeling of her, and shows me the whole thing about single mom's is BS. They can be as immature as 18-20 year olds.

 

Like I said, I'm mostly over it, and going after other girls, but I found this to be just plain rude.

 

Ladies, stay classy and answer the guy you are not interested in.

[GemmaUK]

Mostly I do but if they continue to text without waiting until I have a chance to respond then I have been known to just ignore.

 

Over texting is something I run from.

[Toodaloo]

Mostly I do but if they continue to text without waiting until I have a chance to respond then I have been known to just ignore.

 

Over texting is something I run from.

 

and she isn't the only one...

 

a barrage of messages when I don't have the chance to respond the the first is just a pain in the bottom.

 

I am often out of signal areas so you can imagine all the beeping and buzzing from my phone when I do get back into a signal area... Drives me insane...

[PegNosePete]

Why do you feel this is an exclusively female behaviour?

[GemmaUK]

Uh oh! Back story!

 

You've freaked her out, an attempt at over familiarity especially with someone's child will send any woman running!

Offering to babysit is waaay too much!

[d0nnivain]

I find texting annoying. If you want to interact with me, call. If you can't do that, well I'll get to a text, when I get to it.

[sdrawkcaB ssA]

My SM would do that time to time, depending on her thoughts of its meaning.

 

I let it go and wait another day.

 

Eventually she comes up with an answer. But in hind sight, she was not sure how to answer as she did not want to raise my expectations or crush my feelings. Until she was able to tell me the truth about something she kept from me, as to make sure I did not have a change of heart, them moments of waiting for answers became non-existent.

 

Maybe she still needs time to properly answer, or has something she is hiding.

 

Though there are times when too much info gets in the way, and the question gets lost.

[Michelle ma Belle]

As much as I dislike the whole texting thing, I can see and appreciate the value in it in certain situations.

 

Regardless, responding to texts AND in a timely manner is a pet peeve of mine so I feel your pain. I much rather get an honest response than nothing at all which is exactly how I conduct myself in all matters in life.

 

It's just good manners after all.

[Poppygoodwill]

So you sent a text asking if you're "imposing with my whole friendship and that I don't want to stress her out" ?

 

How can someone answer such a complicated question, with such a blunt and simple tool like text? If you want a real answer to a real question like that, then you must talk to her in person. Or at least over thephone. I mean, c'mon.

 

If I received a text like that, it would be because there was already quite a lot of strange behaviour and I had been avoiding him because I didn't know what to do, and I didn't want to hurt his feelings, and I just wanted him to take the hint and go away.

 

She's not responding, because she wants you to just take the hint and go away. the fact that you're on here blaming "women" for being discourteous, etc, means that you are missing the point by a country mile, and trying to distract yourself from the message, but blaming her and all women, for the medium.

 

Take a look in the mirror. Based on how you have behaved, and how you came to the point of sending a text as quoted above, if you are honest with yourself - do you think it's fair to say that she's maybe being as kind as she can by NOT responding?

 

YOu're just trying to find a way to get her to respond, even though she has no doubt made it clear that she doesn't want to engage with you.

 

Before you blame anyone, be sure that you're not worthy of blame yourself.

[rester]

This thread needs to be looked at in context to the OP's last one. He used this woman's son as an excuse to try to get her number, and offered to babysit even though it appears they don't know each other at all. It was strange at best, creepy at worst. It wasn't honest at all.

[Michelle ma Belle]

This thread needs to be looked at in context to the OP's last one. He used this woman's son as an excuse to try to get her number, and offered to babysit even though it appears they don't know each other at all. It was strange at best, creepy at worst. It wasn't honest at all.

 

Well that indeed changes things

[Maleficent]

 

Like I said, I'm mostly over it, and going after other girls, but I found this to be just plain rude.

 

Ladies, stay classy and answer the guy you are not interested in.

 

I hear you!

 

Not so long ago, a guy actually accepted to come on a date with me, and the day of the date, I emailed him and he never got back to me.

His excuse was that he had trouble saying no. (that's my way of saying men do it too)

 

Move on, forget about this person who is clearly not worth your attention.

 

[Maleficent]

I get that some people over do it. But really I don't think it's an excuse to just ignore someone.

If you're not interested, grow a spine and just say it - whether it's friendship or dating.

 

No matter how excessive or how creepy one person is, I see no reason to at least say (once) "please stop talking to me"

At least from then on, if they continue, you have grounds to make a harassment complaint...

Edited September 26, 2014 by Maleficent

[heartshaped]

She didn't respond because you came on too strong.

 

Honestly, that's how I handle guys like you too. You don't give off the aura that you would handle rejection well so it's just easier to ignore you.

[angel.eyes]

Context is critical! If you read his other thread, she responded to his first text message and said no. This was after he showed up on her doorstep with toys he wanted to give her three-year old son, claimed he was bad with kids, but offered to baby sit her child for an hour . He told her in that conversation he didn't want to date her!

 

After she RESPONDED and declined his first text message offer to meet up, he persisted anyway, with two messages about how he didn't want to pressure her, blah blah blah. No question included in the text. She didn't respond to that text or his equally misguided, strange text after that one.

 

I'm sure OP meant well, but really, he went about the social interaction in the worst possible way. Rather than lashing out at women, it would be far more productive for him to rethink his approach. He got great advice on his thread, but he barreled along anyway.

 

Seriously people, if some single guy you saw around the neighborhood, suddenly showed up on your doorstep with a bunch of toys for your young son, said he wasn't good with kids but he would be happy to watch your three-year old for an hour anytime you needed...then verbally told you in the same interaction he didn't want to date you, what would you think? If he then texted you to meet, and you declined, but he continued to send you bizarre text messages about how mature he is and how he doesn't want to pressure you, would you seriously continue to respond to each one??? You already told him no! What part of no isn't clear?

 

My advice, OP would be to learn to be honest about your intentions when you approach someone.

[Gaeta]

I read your previous thread. She has been ignoring you since you gave her your number. You don't know how to identify a woman that is not interested.

 

You text her 3 times.

 

1st time she ignored you

2nd time she said no to your invitation

3rd time she ignored you

 

How much rejection do you need to understand?

 

I would have ignored you too if you had offered to babysit my 3 year old. You're a complete male stranger to her.

[somegoodman]

Women don't communicate overtly, they communicate covertly. Her not responding basically translates to "**** off, I don't care about you". The only way you'll get a direct honest response from her is if you pester her so much that she's forced to scream the truth in your face.

[Maleficent]

Context is critical! If you read his other thread,

 

dammit hate it when people do that....lol

[Tayken]

@OP....there comes a time when every human needs to learn to read between the line, and this sounds like one of those moments.

 

Plenty more where that fish came from

[you_can_not_see_me]

women in general want to avoid confrontation at all cost, so I think often they think not answering is better, cause if they respond it might lead to the guy trying to argue with her.

 

I would prefer girls did respond back, but I have accepted female non responsiveness as a part of life. Best think to do when they don't respond is just to let it go.

 

If anything the best reaction to a girl not being responsive seems to be to just let it be, on a number of different occasions, the girl finally got back to me after a few days cause I sent her nothing but the initial text, but in the cases where I sent a girl several follow up texts, the girl never got back to me again.

 

With girls its important to give the impression that their non responsiveness isn't a big deal and that you have a life and other things to do.

[Tayken]

women in general want to avoid confrontation at all cost, so I think often they think not answering is better, cause if they respond it might lead to the guy trying to argue with her.

 

I would prefer girls did respond back, but I have accepted female non responsiveness as a part of life. Best think to do when they don't respond is just to let it go.

 

If anything the best reaction to a girl not being responsive seems to be to just let it be, on a number of different occasions, the girl finally got back to me after a few days cause I sent her nothing but the initial text, but in the cases where I sent a girl several follow up texts, the girl never got back to me again.

 

With girls its important to give the impression that their non responsiveness isn't a big deal and that you have a life and other things to do.

 

Bingo.....now we are getting somewhere! The more you stroke their ego / boost their low self esteem, the more they think their $h1t don't stink, and that they are the best thing since slice bread.

 

It never seems to amaze me how people haven't figured how yet that head games doesn't get you anywhere, and if your little sad friends are encouraging you to do it, you have to ask how that is working out for them. As they say "misery loves company"

[BlueIris]

I'm feeling mostly past it, but still slightly bit frustrated. Got to be one of the worst things women do. I don't care if some woman and I hook up or not, but not returned text is one of the rudest things. Even a mellow lie or a harsh "I don't like you" beats total ignore on the text. Answering is polite. Like Nike's lame tag line goes, just "f*%king do it".

 

In my last threat this young single mom who I felt care for did not even bother replying to me initially or to my last message(I only sent 3 messages to her, last one asking if I'm imposing with my whole friendship and that I don't want to stress her out). Basically, I gave her an open way out or she could say that she's thinking about it. Or that I'm not mature or she's too busy in life for any relationships. I can go on. I mean, I'm gonna eventually run into her somewhere in the building, so I don't understand how this at all. Rejecting me would be less awkward than just flat out ignoring me.

 

I've deleted her number from my contacts and will never contact her again. Women who show me disregard, I don't ever take seriously again, so maybe that was her end-goal, but that's a poor way of achieving that. If anything, it creates a more negative feeling of her, and shows me the whole thing about single mom's is BS. They can be as immature as 18-20 year olds.

 

Like I said, I'm mostly over it, and going after other girls, but I found this to be just plain rude.

 

Ladies, stay classy and answer the guy you are not interested in.

 

Call instead. Call women.

If they refuse telephone conversations, then I'd be concerned about how classy they were.

[mrgoodcat]

I read your previous thread. She has been ignoring you since you gave her your number. You don't know how to identify a woman that is not interested.

 

You text her 3 times.

 

1st time she ignored you

2nd time she said no to your invitation

3rd time she ignored you

 

How much rejection do you need to understand?

 

I would have ignored you too if you had offered to babysit my 3 year old. You're a complete male stranger to her.

 

I keep explaining about babysitting was in "emergency situation". I've seen this girl around and had small conversations for 3-4 years now. She knows my sister closely and her baby daughter and so this was a courtesy more than anything. Like if you have no other choice, you can ask me for help, type thing.

 

I also told her in my other message that I wanted to ask her out but got too nervous because I didn't want to put her on the spot and reject meIand that I want to be honest with her. I even volunteered to give her my number when we were talking. She could have just taken pen and paper and not have to call me right there. That's meaningless, but still a small sign. I also think she likes me, just from her body language and constant smiling. But I digress.

 

I think it is well plausible that I f-ed up with my communications and maybe she doesn't want much to do with me. But I also give myself a benefit of a doubt that she is TESTING me. And it really makes contextual sense in this case. She wants to know what kind of person I am and if I'm really serious about her or I just like her body(and it is amazing). It also gives me time to see how I feel about her- is she really worth it? She doesn't have much time and so she doesn't need to waste it on some player/young stud to fool around with.

 

So, as retarded as it may sound, I may give her a call in 1 week and leave a message asking how she is and if we can talk like around the lobby or maybe go to a nice coffee place. Yeah, I may be an idiot that can't get a clue, but then she's not some random girl I met over in Starbucks and asked for her number. We're bound to run into each other within a month or tow, so the whole ignore thing makes it more awkward than just saying it flat out over text. That's like the easiest way too.

 

So, I think it could be a test. In the meantime, I'm doing pretty well on OkCupid. It's a tough site for even decent looking guys like me.

Edited September 26, 2014 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[Emilia]

In my last threat this young single mom who I felt care for did not even bother replying to me initially or to my last message(I only sent 3 messages to her, last one asking if I'm imposing with my whole friendship and that I don't want to stress her out). Basically, I gave her an open way out or she could say that she's thinking about it. Or that I'm not mature or she's too busy in life for any relationships. I can go on. I mean, I'm gonna eventually run into her somewhere in the building, so I don't understand how this at all. Rejecting me would be less awkward than just flat out ignoring me.

 

I've deleted her number from my contacts and will never contact her again. Women who show me disregard, I don't ever take seriously again, so maybe that was her end-goal, but that's a poor way of achieving that. If anything, it creates a more negative feeling of her, and shows me the whole thing about single mom's is BS. They can be as immature as 18-20 year olds.

 

Like I said, I'm mostly over it, and going after other girls, but I found this to be just plain rude.

 

Ladies, stay classy and answer the guy you are not interested in.

I would never respond to some random guy that asked weird questions like that making me feel uncomfortable. The others have read your previous threads and from your first post as well it's clear that you want to keep uncomfortable situations going because you don't have an understanding of boundaries. She ignored you because she wanted you to go away. You have to respect it when a person just does not wish to talk to you anymore.

 

You need to learn how to pick up on social clues on when to stop.

[Cristo]

women in general want to avoid confrontation at all cost, so I think often they think not answering is better, cause if they respond it might lead to the guy trying to argue with her.

 

I would prefer girls did respond back, but I have accepted female non responsiveness as a part of life. Best think to do when they don't respond is just to let it go.

 

If anything the best reaction to a girl not being responsive seems to be to just let it be, on a number of different occasions, the girl finally got back to me after a few days cause I sent her nothing but the initial text, but in the cases where I sent a girl several follow up texts, the girl never got back to me again.

 

With girls its important to give the impression that their non responsiveness isn't a big deal and that you have a life and other things to do.

 

Bingo.....now we are getting somewhere! The more you stroke their ego / boost their low self esteem, the more they think their $h1t don't stink, and that they are the best thing since slice bread.

 

It never seems to amaze me how people haven't figured how yet that head games doesn't get you anywhere, and if your little sad friends are encouraging you to do it, you have to ask how that is working out for them. As they say "misery loves company"

 

In my experience, not ALL women do this (or at least, the more intelligent ones do it less frequently).

 

At this point in my dating life, poor communication skills are almost a dealbreaker (depending on the context). If I notice that a woman simply doesn't respond to something to avoid confrontation, it's a huge turn-off and a red flag to me.