ShiningMoon Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 A year and a half so I met a guy online. He was absolutely everything I was looking for. Our chemistry was amazing and truthfully I had never connected so well with a ma before he came along. Now things started going south a couple weeks after we met because he would cancel our dates repeatedly. Stopped contacting him since there was no point in talking to someone I can see whenever they feel like it. Fast forward, about 6 months later, he sent me an apology text on Valentine's Day asking for another shot. He said I left a mark on him and he felt bad for what happened. I believe in second chances so I gave him another shot. It didn't last long as he cowardly stated ignoring me after 3 weeks and turns out he was hooking up with girls he found on sex websites and hookers on FB. He ditched me for them when he had told me he'd be crazy to let me go. 4 months later, I found a message from him on FB. He told me he had been looking for me everywhere but couldn't find me (I had deactivated my account). He apologized for treating me the way he did ad acknowledged the fact that his attitude was rude, selfish and downright douchy. Anyway, he told me he's been thinking of me and the way he and I connected and therefore wants to give 'us' a real shot. He supposedly wants to start from scratch and prove to me he's not the jerk he seemed to be. He said he was stupid and immature but now realizes he let someone special slip away. Although he told me these great things, I'm confused. I already have a job lined up abroad and right now he's not in the country. He's due to come back around the time I'll be leaving. I get the fact that the answer to this question is a no brained - The Job. But the way I feel for this man is like nothing I had experienced before. Hence, I'm not sure. I don't want to live with the what ifs. What should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Especially give his lousy tract record, you take the job. Let him up-end his life if you are that important to him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Potz4prez Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 He doesn't sound too dreamy... He'll ditch you again. Go for the job. Link to post Share on other sites
MikeyBe Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 This is the man of your dreams? As the great George Dubya would say, Fool me once, shame on you... Fool me twice, can't fool me again. Wait, no. Damnit George. Its: Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Take the job and delete his number. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
BlueIris Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Job, for sure. Key word in your description of him is "dreams." He's a good prospect only in your dreams, not in reality. (I hate that when that happens.) Link to post Share on other sites
lollipopspot Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 As the great George Dubya would say, Fool me once, shame on you... Fool me twice, can't fool me again. No, it's a better quote than that Combined with the vacant eyes and mortal confusion...truly shocking that half the voters would elect this moron. Link to post Share on other sites
WhiskeyJack Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Come on, you really can't be actually asking this question. Look at his track record. Theres like a 90% chance he will do this again. Worry about yourself, take the job and move on. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
FlippinJacks Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 No one is steering you wrong here. It never stops amazing me what people will allow others to do to them, and still want them. Please, go for the job. Go, fly away, meet new people, new guys, find someone who wants to be with you, not ditch you for hookers. Want to know what your future COULD hold with someone like this? Read my thread. Link to post Share on other sites
Diezel Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 He sounds like the man of your nightmares. Pick the job, how is this even a choice? Link to post Share on other sites
Assasda Posted June 27, 2014 Share Posted June 27, 2014 Wow this is the guy of youre dreams. Youre not hard to please then. Its guaranteed you meet someone better than him after you start your new job Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 Think of the fantastic men you will meet abroad. The world is your oyster. Stay away from that crab. Link to post Share on other sites
Elle1975 Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 A year and a half so I met a guy online. He was absolutely everything I was looking for. Our chemistry was amazing and truthfully I had never connected so well with a ma before he came along. Now things started going south a couple weeks after we met because he would cancel our dates repeatedly. Stopped contacting him since there was no point in talking to someone I can see whenever they feel like it. Fast forward, about 6 months later, he sent me an apology text on Valentine's Day asking for another shot. He said I left a mark on him and he felt bad for what happened. I believe in second chances so I gave him another shot. It didn't last long as he cowardly stated ignoring me after 3 weeks and turns out he was hooking up with girls he found on sex websites and hookers on FB. He ditched me for them when he had told me he'd be crazy to let me go. 4 months later, I found a message from him on FB. He told me he had been looking for me everywhere but couldn't find me (I had deactivated my account). He apologized for treating me the way he did ad acknowledged the fact that his attitude was rude, selfish and downright douchy. Anyway, he told me he's been thinking of me and the way he and I connected and therefore wants to give 'us' a real shot. He supposedly wants to start from scratch and prove to me he's not the jerk he seemed to be. He said he was stupid and immature but now realizes he let someone special slip away. Although he told me these great things, I'm confused. I already have a job lined up abroad and right now he's not in the country. He's due to come back around the time I'll be leaving. I get the fact that the answer to this question is a no brained - The Job. But the way I feel for this man is like nothing I had experienced before. Hence, I'm not sure. I don't want to live with the what ifs. What should I do? Fool me once.. go for the job. Link to post Share on other sites
soccerrprp Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 Yes, you are right...it's a no brainer. This guy shouldn't be anyone's "dream" ideal of a partner from what he did....THE JOB! BTW, where to? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RachR Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 How you feel about him doesn't make him the man of your dreams. Is the man of your dreams really this unreliable and flakey? JOB. Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 You need to give your head a serious shake if you think this guy is even remotely man-of-my-dreams material. As someone already pointed out, he's more man-of-my-nightmares. Please, PLEASE save your dignity. This guy is pathological at best. I suspect you have some serious work do to on yourself and your self worth. Any healthy and balanced person can see this guy is scum. Run. Run as far away as you can. Save yourself from a lifetime of heartbreak. Link to post Share on other sites
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 Err the job? WTF 1 Link to post Share on other sites
acrosstheuniverse Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 JOB! They are hard to come by, OP. Especially ones you really care about. They don't always come back around any time soon. I just got offered my first proper adult serious job in the field I've been working forwards for several years, pulling 70 hour weeks for five months on the trot, studying and working multiple jobs to get there. Thirty job applications later I've been offered the job of my dreams in a new location on a liveable wage with weekends and nights off for the first time in what feels like forever. I swear I've never had a better feeling than this, it's like winning the lottery. Would I swap that for even a guy I was in love with, who treated me like a queen, who I was in a longstanding committed relationship with? No, because if history has taught me anything it's that men come and go, you can only rely on yourself and you have to be self sufficient and power on because the right person will stick with you for the ride. Would I swap it for someone who kept flaking out on me that I'd never even been in a relationship with, just because for a couple weeks we clicked? I can't believe that's even a question. He will do it again, OP. Link to post Share on other sites
DArtagnan2 Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 just to add more strength to what others are saying. go for the job. Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGypsy Posted June 28, 2014 Share Posted June 28, 2014 Go for the job, and find a new, reliable man. Link to post Share on other sites
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