krista28 Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 recently i started seeing this guy..things were going alright and he said that he wanted to take things slow…so we kind did but on the same note we started sleeping together right away. low and behold one night we had an argument abouthe doesnt want a commited relationship and how its gonna end up hurting me. so what does he do…his first response is to go after my friend. my nasty friend who went to his house even though she knew we had just broke up things. so anyhow..him and ihad abig spat..his respnse was im “not interested”even though thats a lie. we had fun, had something special between us. I know it. he messed me up so bad i couldnt even concentrate for a week. i knew there was something there… so a couple weeks pass…he contacts me again..tells me he never saw my friend after that night… we hangout and cuddle…we end up sleeping together and then i leave. after i leave he tells me he cant do this to me and im a good person…that he desnt think we are clicking and that he cant waste my time. earlier in the night he had told me how he pushes people away from him and there are some things about himself that he doesnt even want to admit to himself. so…yeah i get that text the day after i leave his house..thinking things are fixed and that maybe he might fall for me.. just pushed me away so fast. what do i do now….what do i do if he contacts me again..i know im retarded and dumb…but the only reason i went over there again is cuz i freaking felt something amazing for him. is he gonna come around…what am i gonna do? is this guy gonna keep trying to get back in my life? should i just ditch him for good?
ConstantVoyager Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Unless you really like painful drama, ditch this guy.
Mascara Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 You're not "retarded and dumb", but yes you should dump him. (Funny how his idea of "going slow" still means sleeping together). 5
jwizzle Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 sounds like he plays games. Unless you enjoy it, I suggest you move on..
Ninjainpajamas Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 If a guy says he wants to take it slow, it has nothing to do with sex...it's about the commitment...they don't want to commit, they just want a short-term fling, they're not completely into you. The problem here is you think something "amazing" is happening, and that's a major problem with women that keeps them around far longer than they ever should, tolerating way more than anyone should as like a "sacrifice" to this desired relationship....sorry, whoever taught you to think that way is retarded...it doesn't work, guy only sticks around due to limited/no options or as a way of settling, if your vision of romance is dragging a guy underwater by his neck until he "sees what he's missing" then knock yourself out, I've seen grown women do that with men back and forth year after year for 6 years and on...if that's your kind of life, then hey, nobody is stopping you...million other women trying to do the same thing, just for bob sakes don't be confused, you're clearly trying to force something this guy doesn't want to do. Finally, this whole "I know how he feels" crap, look you don't know how he feels...you are the average woman, you will never understand men and therefore will never understand how one feels, relationships aren't about mind reading or believing in some mythical thing in your head that you think you KNOW...trust me, you don't...I know you think you do, many married women think they do, but you don't....you only the parts that men are willing to tell you, and guess what? they only tell you the parts they want you to hear....doesn't mean anything sinister is brewing, it just means you simply can't KNOW everything a man thinks and feels all of the time....so stop it, stop thinking you know how this guy feels just because you had this amazing time, I'm sick of seeing this shet with guys who don't get a rats @ss about a woman and yet she continue to believe in some fantasy...it's pathetic and a waste of your time. If you've even been pushed this far, and you're still even considering this situation with this guy then you're a fool and a doormat..sorry that's what you're being right now, because this guy is acting like your average joe who wants to cake eat...it's simply and clear as day, but you don't get it through the rock in your head...you're not listening, you think you know better, you think your "feelings" are right even though your gut feeling tells you that this isn't....but be a fool, nobody is stopping you, I'm sure he'll use you and you'll go back and forth like a hot mess trying to "figure it out" but you're not going to figure out anything because the one thing you're avoiding is the truth...nothing is confusing here, you're confusing yourself. The guy just doesn't want you, get it through your head...but go ahead make ridiculous excuses for him that make no sense with men.
CrazyAlex Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 OP is crazy, not the guy. (and this is coming from someone with "crazy" in their username).
todreaminblue Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 i am not going to make fun of you krista or use sarcasm to prove a point.......this guy is using affection to manipulate you.......sleeping with someone is one hell of a commitment...is he crazy for doing what he is doing no...he isnt.. he hasnt any mental illness or some deep rooted psyche problem...he is doing what some guys do ....finding an easy lay with no commitment.......hooking you, baiting that hook with hope and what you feel is affection(what he sees as just sex) as soon as he gets what he wants he discards you until he feels like sex again........he has given you no promise, no hope, no future......do not have sex with him he isnt for you, you are not crazy for believing that he may change his mind......but you are not right in thinking he will...he wont.... if a guy truly cares about you and this goes for women as well, they are willing to make a commitment other than between the sheets...sleeping with someone straight away , you will never know if it is the sex they stay for.....or they stay for you.....dont waste your time not one second more.... end it....make sure any guy you go out with or date is committed to you not just making a commitment in using your body...hugs....deb
Phantom888 Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 OP: Why do you punish yourself? You clearly see this guy as toxic and game-playing, yet you still sleep with him and hoping he would fall for you? Guys like this is bad news. He makes drama because he is immature, bored, and has you to entertain him. Please show some respect for yourself. You future soul mate would really appreciate it knowing that you overcame this toxic relationship.
mercuryshadow Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 When a guy, in so many words, warns you that he has issues and will hurt you, LISTEN TO HIM (and run).
KatZee Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 Lol, he's not crazy. He's using you for sex, plain and simple. How does this even make sense: "I want to take things slow. But lets have sex on our first date!" He had sex with you and THEN decided to tell you he didn't want a relationship. So all along he wanted nothing but casual sex, no strings attached. YOU are the one projecting feelings onto a pseudo-relationship. Sure, YOU may feel something "special" for this guy, but I'm telling you now, this guy does not feel the same for you. Sleeping with him again and again isn't going to make him feel these things. He was straight up with you. He doesn't want anything serious. But if you're willing to put out for free, do you really think he's going to turn it down? In order to make himself not look like a COMPLETE a.ssbag, he tells you that you're "such a good person" and he "can't waste your time." Yup. Just offer yourself up on a silver platter again. He WILL have sex with you.
crederer Posted October 18, 2013 Posted October 18, 2013 He was honest from the get go, he didn't want a relationship just sex. You continued to give him that in hopes he'd change his mind. He didn't. Neither of you are crazy, just looking for different things.
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