lannistera Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 so.....I really like this catholic girl...... now I've heard somewhere that dating a catholic girl you need to take things slowly... sometimes even starting from friendship first. I've also heard the horror stories of the dreaded Friend Zone. Can someone give me some advice on how I should proceed with this lovely girl? I've known her for a couple months now, and I asked her to a dinner last Friday. We had a great time but kept things platonic to the point it didn't feel like a date. (I'm wondering if she even thought of it as a date to begin with). Honestly I can't even tell what she thinks of me. I plan to ask her to another dinner in a couple week or maybe even sooner. Should I slow down and wait a bit or should I stay on course? I'm at a loss here. Can someone explain to me how catholics view dating and what is the progression in relationships? Thanks guys! Notes: She is quite religious from my observation (regularly go to church, etc.) She's 20 years old and has never dated anyone before. She is very friendly and outgoing so it's hard to read her reactions whether or not she has a thing for me of more than just a friend (she has MANY friends) Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 Ask to go to church with her one Sunday and then breakfast afterwards rather than dinner one time. That's my advice. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
apple OR orange Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 well they key here would be dont hide words "hi, you want to meet Monday for another date", see you used the word, nothing hidden. Link to post Share on other sites
Eclypse Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 I knew a girl very similar to this. I unfortunately commented on an anti abortion video she put up and.. well... just be very careful with voicing your opinions around her. Also if you want to have sex expect to wait until marriage. Those are the main issues I had. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 I was immersed in Catholic girls for the entirety of my private education and can relate that, even back in the 70's, they were all over the place. Some were very conservative and some had marks from the bleachers on their backs, and everything in between. My usual advice of not paying attention to what a young lady says, but rather to what she does, applies. Yeah, we all regularly went to church too, like three times a week, and religion class every day I think the breakfast after church suggestion has traction. Good venue to build synergy and show her you respect her beliefs. That said, Catholic girls who may not do PIV premarital definitely have lips that work so set yourself apart from the friendzone through physical interaction of the non-platonic sort ASAP. She's 20, not a teenager. She knows how mommy and daddy made her. Her parts work, just like a non-Catholic girl. Respect her but refrain from pedestal-building. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Estate Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 so.....I really like this catholic girl...... now I've heard somewhere that dating a catholic girl you need to take things slowly... sometimes even starting from friendship first. I've also heard the horror stories of the dreaded Friend Zone. Can someone give me some advice on how I should proceed with this lovely girl? I've known her for a couple months now, and I asked her to a dinner last Friday. We had a great time but kept things platonic to the point it didn't feel like a date. (I'm wondering if she even thought of it as a date to begin with). Honestly I can't even tell what she thinks of me. I plan to ask her to another dinner in a couple week or maybe even sooner. Should I slow down and wait a bit or should I stay on course? I'm at a loss here. Can someone explain to me how catholics view dating and what is the progression in relationships? Thanks guys! Notes: She is quite religious from my observation (regularly go to church, etc.) She's 20 years old and has never dated anyone before. She is very friendly and outgoing so it's hard to read her reactions whether or not she has a thing for me of more than just a friend (she has MANY friends) I was raised Catholic. This is 2013. I hate these ridiculous stereotypes. We are not all sheltered overly-conservative nuts. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lannistera Posted March 26, 2013 Author Share Posted March 26, 2013 I was immersed in Catholic girls for the entirety of my private education and can relate that, even back in the 70's, they were all over the place. Some were very conservative and some had marks from the bleachers on their backs, and everything in between. My usual advice of not paying attention to what a young lady says, but rather to what she does, applies. Yeah, we all regularly went to church too, like three times a week, and religion class every day I think the breakfast after church suggestion has traction. Good venue to build synergy and show her you respect her beliefs. That said, Catholic girls who may not do PIV premarital definitely have lips that work so set yourself apart from the friendzone through physical interaction of the non-platonic sort ASAP. She's 20, not a teenager. She knows how mommy and daddy made her. Her parts work, just like a non-Catholic girl. Respect her but refrain from pedestal-building. Good luck. as much as I would love to set myself apart from the friendzone, I don't know exactly how she feels yet. Yes I took her out to dinner, but I didn't think she looked at it as a date. I understand that I need to do something different this time. What would you suggest? Link to post Share on other sites
sabre80 Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 Treat her like any other lady. Do not shove her in a box of stereotypes. Respect her boundaries (or lack of) and see where it goes. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 I understand that I need to do something different this time. What would you suggest? My advice would be, as suggested prior, church and brunch and, if you feel positive and synergistic about those interactions, followed on by a minimum proactive and solid embrace and kiss on the cheek upon parting. No ambiguity. No hesitation. Always progress, never retreat. Like Patton used to say 'I hate taking the same ground twice'. Good advice, in love and war. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
FitChick Posted March 26, 2013 Share Posted March 26, 2013 Girls who went to Catholic school are generally the wildest once they get out. Too many restrictions lead to rebellion. When I was in high school, our neighbor's daughter got pregnant when she transfered from a Catholic school to public school. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lannistera Posted March 27, 2013 Author Share Posted March 27, 2013 My advice would be, as suggested prior, church and brunch and, if you feel positive and synergistic about those interactions, followed on by a minimum proactive and solid embrace and kiss on the cheek upon parting. No ambiguity. No hesitation. Always progress, never retreat. Like Patton used to say 'I hate taking the same ground twice'. Good advice, in love and war. are you suggesting going to church and brunch as a date? I like the idea, but this girl doesn't seem to view things as date. For christ sake I asked her if I can "take you out for dinner" which she accepted yet she didn't seem to act like she was on a date that Friday night. I need something that will get the point across without going all-out telling her all of my inner feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 27, 2013 Share Posted March 27, 2013 Change up. Daytime can be date time. Brunch can be a date. Put the actions in her comfort zone, make the physical move, then set up an evening date if that goes well. Always move forward. Link to post Share on other sites
TheGuard13 Posted March 27, 2013 Share Posted March 27, 2013 How do Catholic girls view dating? Guiltily. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TheGuard13 Posted March 27, 2013 Share Posted March 27, 2013 Hopefully. Anxiety makes the sex better And how. However, I just broke up with a former Catholic over no sex. Sunrise, sunset. Link to post Share on other sites
Bengal Tiger Posted March 27, 2013 Share Posted March 27, 2013 Get to know her as an individual. Don't be so worried about "what catholic girls are like". I don't want anyone to take this the wrong way but I know for a fact there are religious girls who are freaks in the sheets but keep it hidden very carefully. My girlfriend and I are both Catholic but I'm more religious and conservative than she is. We both have a very healthy kinky sex life and we didn't wait very long to jump into bed. She was pleasantly surprised. I was pleasantly surprised that she's been on the pill for years. She values family (rather than just talking about family values) and that doesn't stop us from lots of premarital fun every chance we get. I keep Lenten traditions like meatless Fridays and I gave up sweets. Be mindful of that if she follows it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author lannistera Posted March 27, 2013 Author Share Posted March 27, 2013 UPDATE: So I ran into her again today at an event and she seems quieter than usual around me (she still talks with other people fine). At the end of the event I offered to give her a ride home but she refused.. saying she is going to the gym after. I guess she figured out I like her and she isn't feeling the same towards me.... I think i may have to write this one off. Any thoughts? I may have misinterpreted things..... Link to post Share on other sites
chex Posted March 27, 2013 Share Posted March 27, 2013 Girls who went to Catholic school are generally the wildest once they get out. Too many restrictions lead to rebellion. When I was in high school, our neighbor's daughter got pregnant when she transfered from a Catholic school to public school. Catholic school kids party hard though o3o, at least at my school. I think partying/sex is all seen as fun and games at catholic school 'cuz most of our parents are well off and we haven't seen the bad side of drinking, etc, firsthand. when not under the watch of the administration/parents. Let's just say girls are protesting birth control in public while they're on the pill. Link to post Share on other sites
WildHorses Posted March 28, 2013 Share Posted March 28, 2013 I was raised Catholic. I get down and dirty. It does not matter that I'm Catholic. Try getting to know the person instead and not judge by the fact that they are Catholic instead. Link to post Share on other sites
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