skins21 Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 My girlfriend and I have been together for almost 9 months. I found out waay later at the beginning of our relationship she flirted with guys all the time. Not only that her ex (who she was massively OBSESSED with) were talking about getting back together. Couple weeks later she was in the phone with him nightly, but for the past 3-4 months have stopped all contact with him. I love this girl to death, and I fell in love with her in the early stages. Now I find out she was lying and being shady. I just feel that sometimes the girl I fell in love with was just a front. Idk what to do, I've told her this and she cries and says she's sorry only loves me blah blah blah. We fight a lot, and idk wether I should come to terms with the lying/sneaking around or just end it Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 How can you come to terms with it? She's not trustworthy and was straight up doing things behind your back for the first 2/3rds of your relationship!! Ask her why you should trust her NOW, when you did trust her before she showed she didn't deserve it. How do you know she and her ex won't be back in contact? You really don't. Who cut off contact and why? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author skins21 Posted February 28, 2013 Author Share Posted February 28, 2013 She did at least that's what she tells me. We fight alot over stupid ****, and it's getting old. We almost broke up a week ago, but I couldn't bring myself to do it bc I care about her soo much, and she broke down at the idea of breaking up so she obviously cares. It's just idk how to trust her now bc I want to Link to post Share on other sites
Joaquin Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 You know the score here. Time to stop sniffing the pretend relationship juice and get real. The lies and lack of boundaries are going to torture you as long as you keep this show up. You are not in a relationship. Girls that love YOU and are committed to YOU don't pull this ****e. Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 She did at least that's what she tells me. We fight alot over stupid ****, and it's getting old. We almost broke up a week ago, but I couldn't bring myself to do it bc I care about her soo much, and she broke down at the idea of breaking up so she obviously cares. It's just idk how to trust her now bc I want to I doubt she cares as much as you think she does. The main advantage she has is that you love her and she knows it. She can use that against you any time you want to break up with her. Really.....put your foot down and get out of there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author skins21 Posted February 28, 2013 Author Share Posted February 28, 2013 I really wish you guys could be here to see/hear everything. Bc it feels like love but others it feels like work. She's the first girl I've told that I loved her, and any past relationships didn't mean **** to me I cheat on them and treated em like ****, but never cheated on her and treated her as best as I could. It's hard to walk away from something like tha Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 I really wish you guys could be here to see/hear everything. Bc it feels like love but others it feels like work. She's the first girl I've told that I loved her, and any past relationships didn't mean **** to me I cheat on them and treated em like ****, but never cheated on her and treated her as best as I could. It's hard to walk away from something like tha No kidding. I would understand a situation far better seeing it with my own two eyes than reading a bunch of words on a online dating site. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
veggirl Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Shouldn't be so much drama / lying/ fighting at 9 months, esp when it sounds like it's been going on for the whole relationship. You guys are not compatible, whether you are "in love" with her or not. Have you ever had a relationship that did not have drama flowing through it like this? I am guessing not, because once you experience that, you won't put up with s.hit like this in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
Author skins21 Posted February 28, 2013 Author Share Posted February 28, 2013 I did but in the past I didn't put up with it, but with her I do. Sometimes it just comes to a point where you need to say is it worth it Link to post Share on other sites
CptSaveAho Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 I really wish you guys could be here to see/hear everything. Bc it feels like love but others it feels like work. She's the first girl I've told that I loved her, and any past relationships didn't mean **** to me I cheat on them and treated em like ****, but never cheated on her and treated her as best as I could. It's hard to walk away from something like tha Hard walking away from what? I think you are using her to pay for crimes you committed in the past and like being tortured No sane person would take this abuse. I bet you are thinking "she's special and different" yup she's exactly like you in past relationships, doesnt give a ****, lies to you and cheats on you. You just enjoy the drama Link to post Share on other sites
Eggplant Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 The fact that she was thinking about her other man indicates that she is not madly in love with you. I'm so sorry. Sometimes women hang on to a man just because they don't want to be single. This is wrong, and I'm sorry you've been hurt. Link to post Share on other sites
AverageCat Posted March 1, 2013 Share Posted March 1, 2013 Well I hope you learned one thing from all this. Do not jump in a relationship too soon, otherwise your expectations are gonna cause you pain. Let's see at what would have happened if you had taken it slower and gone through just dating at first.... She would have done her whole thing with the ex, flirt with other guys... All permissible when not in a relationship. And then when you both knew you were ready you could have ended Happily Ever After...... That said, Drop Her. You can't love someone you don't trust. Link to post Share on other sites
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