Celleste Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 This guy confuses me and I have no idea what to do because we only had sex. I met him from a dating website and on our profiles it stated that we were both looking for a relationship. Upon our first meet he was coming on to me strong sexually. In my mind I assumed he just wanted to have sex and nothing more with me. We never went out on a date. We texted and talked on the phone a couple of times but nothing happened outside his bedroom. I can have meaningless sex with a man without an emotional bond. I figured if this guy didn’t want to date me and just wanted some bedroom fun then I was ok with that. He was extremely attractive and I was in lust. After sex it got weird. He asked me out on a date. I accepted the invitation but then he cancelled the next day. Then it got even weirder. He tries to get to know me. Every day he kept in contact through texting or calling. I realized that he had a great sense of humor, with a very charming and likeable personality. He kept mentioning how much he misses me, he always thinks about me and how great he thought I was. Always saying how much he likes me. Every day he gave me a load of compliments that actually felt genuine and heartfelt. I felt like this guy was falling in love with me or/and was trying to get me to fall in love with him. Yet he only initiate sex when he wants to see me. He gave me a wonderful feeling. I was starting to fall fast and hard. So I freaked out. I was overwhelmed with mixed emotions not knowing where this relationship was heading. When I asked what he truly wanted from me he never gave me a straight answer. I then panicked when he started to use the word love. Even during sex he asked if I loved him (I didn’t respond). This all happened in a course of four weeks. I’ve been heart broken before and out of fear I sent him an insensitive text so he can back off (I pushed guys away before). I didn’t know if he was genuine or not. It was hard for me to believe a man would feel so strongly for me in such a little time without an actual date. I sent him an apology shortly afterwards. The texts, compliments and calls all stopped. I received a drunk dial from him a few days later. He expresses what he truly wanted which was me. Expressing all these feelings that he had for me. When I asked him while he was sober if he remembered what he said. He claims that he didn’t and went back to his distant behavior. He seemed really irritated with me and may be losing interest in sex. I’m thinking of pulling his full interest back in if I can. I’m missing him like crazy but don’t know if I should make a move. Everything was so unexpected and all happened so damn fast. Can a man really fall in love that fast? I assumed he would devalue me because we had sex so soon. It’s so hard for me to believe that he was genuine in only four weeks. What should I do with all these unresolved feelings? Right now I’m not feeling too great. I really want to call him but fear rejection. What do you think? Link to post Share on other sites
Washingmachine1980 Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 Find someone else and dump him. He is just using you. He said he loved you just to reign you in so you would keep having sex with him. He is one of those who wants women to chase after him for an ego boost. Tell him you're tired of his games and to get lost. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Washingmachine1980 Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 Also, most men you meet online are exactly like this. It really is full of creeps, weirdos, losers, liars and usually the lowest of the low. Try to meet men in others ways beside the Internet. Any woman who has tired online dating will tell you the same. It's just a gross, dirty place that will end hurting your self-esteem and make you never trust men again. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Astra5 Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 From what u explained... sounds like he is stringing you along and was playing MR. romantic and cute to keep the chance of getting back in ur pants... He sounds like a typical a-hole male... thinking with their OTHER head... playing games with ur head and heart to keep you dangling on the line.. its pathetic!! and sounds like u deserve better!! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
superb Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 Sounds like an ex of mine, he did this back and forth with me for almost 2 years. When he left he left, no feelings...came and went as he pleased. Waste of time and emotion if you ask me. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Celleste Posted January 27, 2013 Author Share Posted January 27, 2013 Also, most men you meet online are exactly like this. It really is full of creeps, weirdos, losers, liars and usually the lowest of the low. Try to meet men in others ways beside the Internet. Any woman who has tired online dating will tell you the same. It's just a gross, dirty place that will end hurting your self-esteem and make you never trust men again. It amazes me on what men will say to get what they want with me. I felt that he wasn't genuine and when I sent that text I knew something wasn't right. He completely shut down on me and didn't even bother to ask why I felt the way I did. If he cared or liked me sooo much he would have atleast responded. My feelings didn't matter to him. All the lies and deceit was unnecessary. If all he wanted was sex I was ok with that. I've heard of men wooing their lover to make sure they didn't want to sleep with anyone else while they did whatever they wanted. I'm sure he was the type. I was almost convinced. It's scary. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Forever Learning Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 I agree with everyone so far, he is a real game player, and really, that is all you need to know about him. Block him, forget him, and avoid all future men you meet that are like him. Seriously. You deserve SO MUCH BETTER. All the best to you. Link to post Share on other sites
tbf Posted January 27, 2013 Share Posted January 27, 2013 He continues to hook and then drops you. Notice how your emotions are increased? In doing so, he's amped your anxiety level where you get relief from anxiety when he contacts. It's a form of softening up your resistance, so you'll still be amenable for booty calls when it suits him. Stick, stick, stick, carrot. Block his number and move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Celleste Posted January 27, 2013 Author Share Posted January 27, 2013 It would be so nice if someone posted that he was really into me. Falling for me and to not let him get away or I might be making a mistake. I then call him or he calls me. We talk it out and live happily ever after. Everyone's respond gave me a good push towards reality. It was just a fantasy that I was caught up in. Link to post Share on other sites
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