Lovely Girl Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 I really like this guy (my crush for years) that works at a grocery store. I’ve seen him give me the eye a couple of times but I don’t know if that means anything. He helped me find an item in the store before and would smile at me a lot but I still don’t know if that means anything. He’s really popular so I don’t know if he would even look at me that way. One day I “attempt” to start a conversation. I go up to him and I pretend to lose my keys. I ask if he’s seen them. He says no and I then ask if there’s a lost and found at the store? He replies yes, but then smiles and asks for my number, so if he found them he would call. He puts it in his cell (but I don’t know if he saved it). I actually left a key on purpose so he would find it. But I guess he never did and he never called. So my first question is: Regardless of how he got my number, if he really liked me would he have called me anyway? Even if he just called to say I didn’t find it? He didn’t have to ask me for my number he could have just left it alone and said call the store’s lost and found department, but he didn’t. So what was the point of him asking? I really like this guy but I never actually had a conversation with him and that might be the problem. I felt like we made a non verbal connection. I realize that he might just think I’m attractive but that’s it. If he really wanted to make it happen wouldn’t he have done so already? Should I try one more time to talk to him? Maybe start a real conversation and then ask if he wants to exchange numbers (even though he has mine) or exchange Facebook IDs? So we can stay in touch and get to know each other as friends. Or should I just let it go and let him be the aggressor?
jobaba Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 How old are you? Nobody here ever answers threads like this about crushes (though they are usually started by men). But I'll tell you exactly what I tell the men who ask these threads. Don't let yourself get emotionally invested into someone you don't know likes you back (or in this case don't even know at all). Friends? You've never even had a conversation with the guy. He's a hot piece of meat and that's all.
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 17, 2012 Author Posted April 17, 2012 I will keep that in mind. Thanks
mixwell Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 (edited) Kind of a lame way to give out your number, in your case he could have taken your number ONLY to be nice and help you "find your keys" or he could be interested.. I personally would take a number of a chick I didn't like if I worked with her and she needed help.. Would have been better if you just asked him to hang out, at least you'd know where you stand.. Hell I have numbers of female co workers that I would never date but just because of the friendship or whatever level.. I think giving out your number now days it a lot more common and non meaningful as it may have been years ago.. IMO the only way to see if he's interested is make up some BS how you found your key to exclude that from your situation and ask him if he'd be down to get some coffee sometime.. It maybe hard and some traditionalist say the man should initiate but if you like this guy then who cares ? At least you will know where he stands. Edited April 17, 2012 by mixwell
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 17, 2012 Author Posted April 17, 2012 Why Would a guy go out of his way to ask for your number if they don't want it?!!! Is it an ego boost? Like seriously what was the point?
gaius Posted April 17, 2012 Posted April 17, 2012 Why Would a guy go out of his way to ask for your number if they don't want it?!!! Is it an ego boost? Like seriously what was the point? He doesn't want to insult you by not asking for it. There are reasons he might not be calling other than not liking you. Maybe he's seeing someone and isn't a scumbag. I think you really need to start talking with him more often. If I saw some girl walk past me for years and the only time she said hello was when she lost her keys I wouldn't think she was interested.
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 17, 2012 Author Posted April 17, 2012 There's really more to the story than what I posted but I didn't want it to be long. You're absolutely right he didn't know I liked him and I wasn't about to go up to him and be like "hey I like you" lol. The thing is this guy showed interest in me first. So to reciprocate my feelings I would smile at him when he would look at me. I think at this point he knows I like him. Plus as far as I know he doesn't have a gf b/c I know ppl who are mutual friends with him. So yeah idk My question is: regardless of how a guy got your number would he call you anyway if he liked you? Or is it like the movie where "he's just not that into you"?
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 17, 2012 Author Posted April 17, 2012 Oh and another thing, I'm the one who suggested the whole being nice thing but not even that makes sense. "If he was just being nice" he could have called me to say I didn't find your keys. If he had no intention of calling me or looking for my keys he could have just said call lost and found in a couple of days and I'll turn them in if I find them, but he didn't. My point is there was no need to get my number unless he collects girls numbers.
fortyninethousand322 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I want to know how old both of you are. When I was young(er) and stupid(er) I would have been totally clueless and not used the number at all (happened a few times). At my age, I think most people would use the number to give you a call or a text or something.
truth_seeker Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Two Possibilities: 1) He was just being a good guy trying to help you out since you lost your key, and knows you from being a regular customer. 2) He might be into you but feels weird calling you for a date and not about the key. He could be thinking "what if she isn't into me and I have to see her at the store." He might not be brave enought to take a chance. He would rather talk more in person to get a better feel for you. 1
Eddie Edirol Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 2) He might be into you but feels weird calling you for a date and not about the key. He could be thinking "what if she isn't into me and I have to see her at the store." He might not be brave enought to take a chance. He would rather talk more in person to get a better feel for you. Lovely youre putting too much creedence on your subtle hints, and reading too much into what he does. If you like him, start up a conversation and end it by suggesting a place to go together. By asking him about doing his job, you put him in an awkward position. He doesnt know if you went up to him for your keys or not. In his mind if he calls you and tries to talk to you about anything other than your keys, you could call his boss and get him fired for harassing customers. So he cant take that chance. Go back to him and talk to him about anything but work. Suggest an outing, then you will know if hes interested or not. If he says no, then you know for sure. 1
fortyninethousand322 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I'm 20 he's 23 Oh wow. Well, me being me if a girl gave me her number I'd be tempted to use it for some reason. But, when I was 18 or 19 or so I probably would not call a girl who gave me her number because I'd be too nervous and think she didn't really like me. So, maybe he's unsure if you're interested. My advice? Ask him why he didn't call you. And talk to him for a bit and make it clear (without outright saying it if possible) that you're interested. If he's interested and not totally clueless he'll respond favorably.
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 You're right I didn't even think about that, he could get fired. But who would seriously do that to someone? I sorta think he might just be conceited. Most hot guys are, the type that think every girl wants to date them. So they feel like they don't have to do anything. Plus he smirked at me when he asked for my number, like "I already know she's gonna give it to me"
Feelsgoodman Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Why Would a guy go out of his way to ask for your number if they don't want it?!!! Is it an ego boost? Like seriously what was the point? He told you why he asked for you number...he was going to call you in case he found the keys. Maybe he was just trying to be helpful. Sometimes there is no double meaning...
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 @fortyninethousand322 I've actually seen him since then and I completely ignored him. He was partially ignoring me too but as I was leaving he kept staring at me inside my car. He didn't think I could see him but I did WEIRDO! I don't know why but i still like him. So I will take your advice and start up some convo the next time I see him and ask him if he wants to exchange numbers (even though he already has mine)
fortyninethousand322 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 @fortyninethousand322 I've actually seen him since then and I completely ignored him. He was partially ignoring me too but as I was leaving he kept staring at me inside my car. He didn't think I could see him but I did WEIRDO! I don't know why but i still like him. So I will take your advice and start up some convo the next time I see him and ask him if he wants to exchange numbers (even though he already has mine) Ha, well back in college I sort of did the same thing to a girl I ended seeing for a bit (minus the staring part). We talked for a bit the second day of class and then the next time I saw her I just sort of gave her a head nod and ignored her for the next few weeks. Had she not taken some initiative herself nothing would have happened. Also, taken what I say with a grain of salt. I'm a pretty insecure, shy kind of guy so my perspective is from that POV. He very well could just not be interested, but I've never been in that position (of being the disinterested guy) so just FYI. 1
somedude81 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Just talk and flirt with him like a normal person. 1
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 Yeah he probably isn't interested because if you're a guy and you know you might not see this cute girl again you're gonna make a move IMO. Just like the movie if a guy wants to make it happen he will. But I just still fail to understand why guys show girls attention (smile, stare,etc) in the first place that they're not interested in.
Eddie Edirol Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Yeah he probably isn't interested because if you're a guy and you know you might not see this cute girl again you're gonna make a move IMO. Just like the movie if a guy wants to make it happen he will. But I just still fail to understand why guys show girls attention (smile, stare,etc) in the first place that they're not interested in. He's probably thinking the same thing about you. "Why would she smile and stare at me, but not say anything?" 1
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 He's probably thinking the same thing about you. "Why would she smile and stare at me, but not say anything?" Because I'm a girl we're not suppose to approach guys! Lol We show interest so they can come to us. But what you said is true, us girls don't ever look at it from a guys' perspective. We just think he should initiate things if he's interested.
snowflakes88 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 I agree that you should take a more direct approach. I wouldn't read too much into him asking for your number. If you'd lost your keys where I worked, I'd have done the same thing - and I'm a woman who is most definitely NOT into other women. It was the logical thing to do, IMO... if someone lost their keys in your store, how else are you supposed to contact them if you find them?
Author Lovely Girl Posted April 18, 2012 Author Posted April 18, 2012 I agree that you should take a more direct approach. I wouldn't read too much into him asking for your number. If you'd lost your keys where I worked, I'd have done the same thing - and I'm a woman who is most definitely NOT into other women. It was the logical thing to do, IMO... if someone lost their keys in your store, how else are you supposed to contact them if you find them? That's true but like I said he didn't have to do that. When I asked him if there was a lost and found he could have just said, "yeah call them in a couple of days" or given me the number to the store or something. He asked for my number because he wanted it plus he was smiling. Like he knew he had accomplished something. Which makes me think it was all a big joke to him and that he gets girls numbers all the time w/o having any intention of calling them back. EGO
Feelsgoodman Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 Yeah he probably isn't interested because if you're a guy and you know you might not see this cute girl again you're gonna make a move IMO. Just like the movie if a guy wants to make it happen he will. But I just still fail to understand why guys show girls attention (smile, stare,etc) in the first place that they're not interested in. Life is not a movie. 2
snowflakes88 Posted April 18, 2012 Posted April 18, 2012 That's true but like I said he didn't have to do that. When I asked him if there was a lost and found he could have just said, "yeah call them in a couple of days" or given me the number to the store or something. He asked for my number because he wanted it plus he was smiling. Like he knew he had accomplished something. Which makes me think it was all a big joke to him and that he gets girls numbers all the time w/o having any intention of calling them back. EGO You can cling to that if you want, but I think you are completely overreacting. He did what any nice, normal person would do.
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