PlumPrincess Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 I saw this on another thread and thought, "Cool, hands-one advice and a plan for a change!" (it also made me realize how passive with men I am compared to other women... ). What are your tips? Frustratedstandards, want to meet guys at bars? You and your friends walk in like you own the place. Go straight to the bar, quickly scope out the crowd of men there. Find the guy you want and head straight for him but don't look at him. Squeeze in next to him and ineffectively try to flag the bartender for a drink. If the prey guy is interested, he'll try to help you get a drink and that's when conversation starts since not only will he get the attention of the bartender for you, he'll also want to chat you up and most likely want to buy you a drink of which you will refuse but flirt and thank him. Then, after you've gotten his attention, state that you need to get back to your friends and walk away with a flirty smile. If he's interested, he'll watch where you go, watch you for awhile to see if you came with any guys, what competition is circling you and then approach again.
lospantalonsfancie Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 I disagree. At least, I think this wouldn't work on guys who are highly desirable, or view themselves as such. It might work on gangsta losers who will pursue till they are blue in the testicles. I am reasonably successful with women, not in the sense that I date many at a time (I'm a one woman man), but in a sense that my recent dating history and relationships have exclusively involved women who are highly intelligent and attractive. Since I believe I have a lot to offer, and because one or more women are typically after me, I will not relentlessly pursue any woman more than she pursues me. If I express interest in a woman, and she walks away, I interpret that as a lack of appreciation of what I have to offer, and I therefore will likely not pursue her any further. In other words, I expect the pursuit to be two-sided, rather than just on my part. I think you will find similar attitudes in many men who are not desparate. 1
Author PlumPrincess Posted March 2, 2012 Author Posted March 2, 2012 I guess, the advice can be reduced to this: Give men a chance to offer their help and initiate contact with you. Plus a concrete situation where you can apply it. It's not rocket science, but sometimes I don't see the wood for the trees and need things spelled out for me.
Author PlumPrincess Posted March 2, 2012 Author Posted March 2, 2012 I disagree. At least, I think this wouldn't work on guys who are highly desirable, or view themselves as such. It might work on gangsta losers who will pursue till they are blue in the testicles. I am reasonably successful with women, not in the sense that I date many at a time (I'm a one woman man), but in a sense that my recent dating history and relationships have exclusively involved women who are highly intelligent and attractive. Since I believe I have a lot to offer, and because one or more women are typically after me, I will not relentlessly pursue any woman more than she pursues me. If I express interest in a woman, and she walks away, I interpret that as a lack of appreciation of what I have to offer, and I therefore will likely not pursue her any further. In other words, I expect the pursuit to be two-sided, rather than just on my part. I think you will find similar attitudes in many men who are not desparate. Hmm, yeah, the walking-away-part I didn't get fully either.
threebyfate Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 Haha..knew there would be indignation over it and the knocking of any guy who would pursue! But they will and do, particularly the hot guys. You'll find the hottest guys are usually unaccustomed to being left at the bar so in turning down their drink and leaving, you tweak their curiosity, especially if you're flirting, chatting and smiling with them, while thanking them for their help. In essence, showing all the signs of interest and yet, walking away.
johan Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 That drives me crazy. Some women think they can actually pull that crap with me. I don't let them get away with it.
threebyfate Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 What do you do? Trip over your tongue while following them away?
johan Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 What do you do? Trip over your tongue while following them away? I turn on the charm. The goal immediately becomes get her to buy my drinks. And she will... 1
FitChick Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 If you're short and in the supermarket or Home Depot, ask a cute guy to get something off the top shelf for you.
Crusoe Posted March 2, 2012 Posted March 2, 2012 You'll find the hottest guys are usually unaccustomed to being left at the bar so in turning down their drink and leaving, you tweak their curiosity, especially if you're flirting, chatting and smiling with them, while thanking them for their help. In essence, showing all the signs of interest and yet, walking away. I'd almost forgot the fun and games of it all. I suspect you may already know this but PlumPrincess possibly doesn't. A lot of fella's know this tactic and are well aware that a girl is interested as she walks away. It's not so much that a fella is unaccustomed to being left at the bar, as that we are willing to play and enjoy the game. We watch you wiggle away, and then, if we can time it right, give you just enough time to doubt whether we will come after you before we do. 1
Oxy Moronovich Posted March 3, 2012 Posted March 3, 2012 If you're short and in the supermarket or Home Depot, ask a cute guy to get something off the top shelf for you. I'd do it especially if she had a nice rack. I'd stay up for a long time, pretending I couldn't find it. Then I'd use that as the excuse to constantly look down at her (cleavage) and yell, "Is this what yer looking for?"
2sunny Posted March 3, 2012 Posted March 3, 2012 I saw this on another thread and thought, "Cool, hands-one advice and a plan for a change!" (it also made me realize how passive with men I am compared to other women... ). What are your tips? Unless he's primarily in that bar to suck down the drinks... My suggestion is not in a bar. 1
futuremom Posted March 3, 2012 Posted March 3, 2012 I'd do it especially if she had a nice rack. I'd stay up for a long time, pretending I couldn't find it. Then I'd use that as the excuse to constantly look down at her (cleavage) and yell, "Is this what yer looking for?" And she would notice and cross her arms under them and catch you looking. Then, she would smirk.
fortyninethousand322 Posted March 3, 2012 Posted March 3, 2012 If you're short and in the supermarket or Home Depot, ask a cute guy to get something off the top shelf for you. I'd probably just walk away if anyone did that to me. Unless it was an old lady. I always help old people.
Fondue Posted March 3, 2012 Posted March 3, 2012 If you're short and in the supermarket or Home Depot, ask a cute guy to get something off the top shelf for you. It sounds great in theory, but if most guys are like me, I don't think it's going to be as successful in the approach. I happen to be tall. If a girl asked me to get her something from the top shelf (this happens in many different scenarios, everyone has some use for a tall guy), I get it, give it to them, and walk away. I don't necessarily think this is a conversation starter. It's similar to leaving your seat and giving it to an old person on the bus. Just courteous and polite, nothing more.
musemaj11 Posted March 3, 2012 Posted March 3, 2012 Dating tip for women? DONT BE CHEAP! You have a job. You have your own money. Pay your share on dates.
RedRobin Posted March 3, 2012 Posted March 3, 2012 Unless you wear a hoodie, then you're out of luck...
futuremom Posted March 3, 2012 Posted March 3, 2012 I've got one. Cleavage, lots of cleavage. That's true, that's a way to get a man's attention...it's not always going to be positive attention, but it's attention. And musemaj11? I have a job and can pay for myself, but A) I'm a romantic, and B), I want a guy who is financially stable enough and a gentleman enough to pick up dinner. Now, once he's done that a couple of times, I'll start picking up the tab like every other time, and I'll get him little gifts--aftershave, tickets to a local favored sports team--just something that says "I appreciate you, I appreciate you appreciate me, and we are in a stable relationship." But see, we're talking about the approach, not the relationship. You walk up to a guy (certain ones anyway) and buy him a drink and suddenly he feels emasculated (especially if his friends are there) which makes him mean. It all depends on the approach you want. Ideally, there should be nothing to pay for until the first day, because again, a bar is the wrong place to look for anyone except alcoholics. 1
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