mrgoodcat Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 (edited) Ok, so I have been struggling with this infatuation feeling over a chicky who sorta turned me down since she has a guy and I've been doing a weak job until now of paying attention to her. As a disclosure, I will still pursue her, but now without the baggage of this incredible "addiction" that you get when you want someone. This will be more for the sport. So, here is how you get over her/him. Think back to your previous crush. Remember the feeling of infatuation you had over that person. Remember how much you liked them and wanted to be with them. Now......................................... wait for it.................................... ...............and.......... think about this new "infatuation" you have. It seems so weak and pitiful compared to your old crush. And YET, you don't truly think about your past crush any more, nor really care about them. See! You just have a good old case of silly infatuation. Treat it as that. Every time you get those dreamy thoughts about this new crush, just think back of the old one and it will stop any feelings of gut wrenching frustration and disappointment. I want you guys and gals to tel me if it works! Btw, it really helps if your previous crush was a really hard one. That makes it all that much easier. DISCLAIMER: I am not responsible if you again work up a broken heart over you previous crush, not that it is possible if it's been few months/years. Edited September 13, 2011 by mrgoodcat Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrgoodcat Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 (edited) Bumpity-bump-bump. I want your feedback good people. Does this help or am I the only person this is working for? Feedback me... But seriously, this works for me like some twisted psychological trick. F*ck yea! What I believe this does is it takes you back to the old and extinguished memory sensors that generated similar feelings and it puts what you are feeling now in perspective. Otherwise, you get stuck thinking about the one you on and on like a broken record. This snaps you out of the mental/hormonal state. This makes you imprevious to any dating abuse you'll take. If you were going to say that I'm a genius, thank you, but I already knew that. Edited September 13, 2011 by mrgoodcat Link to post Share on other sites
brokendreamz Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 'Ok, so I have been struggling with this infatuation feeling over a chicky who sorta turned me down since she has a guy and I've been doing a weak job until now of paying attention to her. As a disclosure, I will still pursue her' Why don't you leave it - if a girl is with someone then she's with someone, i.e. NOT YOU! Why do you have to chase her? there are plenty of singletons out there, just check out plenty of fish. I hate hearing about little boys going after girls who are already in a relationship... Grow up - a real man would respect her partner and step the **** back. Link to post Share on other sites
Rabid Ferret Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Pretty much a swing and a miss for me. All my old crushes, even those from when I was in middle school, still pretty much ache in my memory. I lost them all to players. It was pretty much a battle every time to rid myself of thoughts about them. Got easier when I got out of school and never saw them again, though. The only real way I've ever managed to kill off infatuation was to force myself to focus on the negative aspects of the person. She was adorable, but she also liked eminem. That girl was so sweet, but she spent too much time gossiping about other people. That other girl was an angel, but she had breath that could kill a gorilla. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrgoodcat Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 @brokendreams Because she gave me too many signals she liked me. She also just started dating him....it's his probation period. I'll just cut it short. And....I like to get the girls I go for. I know she likes me, so I won't be going against the current. Lastly, she is also conveniently located at the local store I go to, so I don't have to run around clubs wasting time. And finally, I like her personality. She is sweet, pretty, but in my league. That's why. And now this will be only easier with me not being infatuated over her. I want to be with her, but I won't lose any sleep if it don't happen. @Rabid Ferret Doesn't do it for ya? Humm. I don't know, my old crushes just don't ache much at all, and there were some that I literally cried over....I am a tough guy, but that **** tore me up. I cried twice in the past 10 years....when my pops passed away and when over these two women that I knew I couldn't have. That was before I was 20. Link to post Share on other sites
Nexus One Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 When I'm crushing hard, then finding out she has a boyfriend and especially seeing her with that boyfriend kills the crush pretty quickly. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrgoodcat Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 ^^ I didn't have an initial crush on her, and I never truly did. I liked her seeming availability and attainability and I tend to ask a girl out if she acts like she likes me, which she did. Once I saw she has a kiddo hitting after her, it took a whole different spin and made me upset over the whole thing. Then, I wanted her more than before because of that fact, which brought it to infatuation level. Now, I am out of that state and will coolly and collectedly try to court her to see if she really likes me and chooses me over the other guy. It will be a tremendous notch to my ego and I know I can treat that girl right. So, this was the other way around. But if I girl I crush over has a guy, it is HUGE turnoff for me too. Let alone if she brings it up. Link to post Share on other sites
verhrzn Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 You sir are an ass. Link to post Share on other sites
sm1tten Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 This is just sad. Link to post Share on other sites
waynesworld Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I've find that pursuing someone else gets me over an infatuation immediately. Are you sure you're actually over your crush, seeing that you're still going to chase her? What's the "sport" in chasing someone you're over? Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 What's pretty much worked for me in getting over a crush; was to crush on somebody else. Then I just have to hope that I don't run into my old crush again or I'll get a repeat crush. Which is exactly what's happening to me now. All I have to do now is meet the next girl who will break my heart, yay... Link to post Share on other sites
TheGrimSweeper Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I hate hearing about little boys going after girls who are already in a relationship... Grow up - a real man would respect her partner and step the **** back. Completely agreed its so disrespectful. Espeically how there is articles and books out there on how to "steal" someones girlfriend by using manipulative techniques to get their boyfriend to look worse. Theres plenty of single people out there. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 (edited) Completely agreed its so disrespectful. Espeically how there is articles and books out there on how to "steal" someones girlfriend by using manipulative techniques to get their boyfriend to look worse. Theres plenty of single people out there. I'd actually say that women are much, much worse for trying to go after people that are already taken. Edited September 13, 2011 by somedude81 Link to post Share on other sites
verhrzn Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I'd actually say that women are much, much worse for trying to go after people that are already taken. Who said they aren't?? Why the heck are you dragging gender into this?? The poster above you commented that there are books about manipulating girls away from their boyfriends because THAT'S WHAT THE OP IS TRYING TO DO. Don't make this yet another "Men/women Battle" thread, please. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Uh, you were one of three people attacking the dude becuase he had feeligns for somebody who was taken. And did you miss that the whole point of his thread was posting a tip on how to get over somebody? Read over the posts in this thread and you'll see that the vast majority are male bashing. My post was just pointing out that men are not the only gender that tries to get somebody already in a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
verhrzn Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Uh, you were one of three people attacking the dude becuase he had feeligns for somebody who was taken. And did you miss that the whole point of his thread was posting a tip on how to get over somebody? Read over the posts in this thread and you'll see that the vast majority are male bashing. My post was just pointing out that men are not the only gender that tries to get somebody already in a relationship. I think he's an ass not for having feelings for someone who's in a relationship, but for 1) trying to pursue them (you have a right to how you feel, you do NOT have a right to act exactly as you feel) and 2) for trying to get over them and YET STILL pursuing them for "sport." How in the world is that male bashing? Just because he happens to be a male? Do we not get to call him out on his disgusting and manipulative attitude just because women, nebulous anonymous women, may possibly act the same way?? How does that make any sense? Also, your citation of proof that women do the same thing was... a Taylor Swift song. Just... think about that for a second. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I missed his fallow up post where when he found out she was taken, he wanted her more. Yeah that's stupid. As for the Taylor Swift song. I chose that as my example 1) Because I absolutely hate that song and the meaning behind it. 2) The practice is so common and accepted that she made a song about it. Link to post Share on other sites
sm1tten Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 The only reason there is any "male-bashing" in this thread is because it's a male OP. If it was a female, there'd be plenty of "female-bashing." Although I think the responses were pretty tame, considering that he's actively trying to break up a relationship for a person he claims to not even care for just for sport. I mean, yeah, I think he's full of ****, but I'd think that was pitiful no matter who was doing it. Also, his "method" of getting over her didn't even make sense to me. I get over my crushes by getting on with new crushes. All that "thinking" just makes it worse, IMO. Link to post Share on other sites
verhrzn Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I missed his fallow up post where when he found out she was taken, he wanted her more. Yeah that's stupid. As for the Taylor Swift song. I chose that as my example 1) Because I absolutely hate that song and the meaning behind it. 2) The practice is so common and accepted that she made a song about it. Well, to be fair, having feelings for someone who is taken IS a very common experience, and feeling you're better than the other person is probably just as common. But no where in the song does she actually talk about stealing/manipulating him into dumping his current girlfriend. (In the video he seems to come to the conclusion on his own.) Avril Lavine's "I Don't Like Your Girlfriend" is probably more appropriate to the point you're trying to make, in which she actually DOES talk about flirting with him and stealing.... but that's also part of her "bad girl" persona, so it's not like she's trying to portray it as some of virtuous/innocent act. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrgoodcat Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 Man, am I getting flamed here. I guess I'll address 2 key areas 1) By saying I'm going for the "sport" of it is because whoever is with the girl.....he is just fresh. I know it and she was pretty implicit about it. Secondly, what do I care about some clown shoes? That dude probably asked bunch of girls, where I'm selective and only act when I know I can treat a girl right. I'm not a player, but I'm not a loser. I care to make her happier and share good chemistry and expriences, and frankly don't give a jack **** about some dude. If she really cares for him, she won't go out with me and that's where my mindset of a "game" comes in, so I don't get hurt. I take things to heart and I don't finish last. I know if I fail I may get hurt, so I am just protecting myself by being in that mindset. 2) Getting over crushes by finding new crush only works if you have no other important things to handle in life. I got a wagon and a small cart of goals and expectations to meet, so I can't run around chasing ass every week. And on that note, I gotta go buy some stuff in the store and hopefully talk to her. I'd actually appreciate if anyone would give me some tips how to work around this thing and turn it into my favor. Right now, I'll just listen to her and show that I didn't completely move on from her. Improvisation. I'll make sure to share what happens in the next few weeks. Link to post Share on other sites
brokendreamz Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 mrgoodcat. Imagine if you will, how hurt you'd be if the girl of your dreams left you for some other guy who was hitting on her. Now imagine how this girls current boyfriend would feel if you succeeded in taking her away from him. Now imagine you've taken that girl off him and she's now with you. Now imagine how paranoid you'd feel knowing that she's that easily manipulated. A lot of imagining I know and perhaps you really don't care about the other guy which is a great shame. I wonder how old you are? Your views on relationships and your 'all's fair in love and war' take on life tell me just how inexperienced/immature you are - hopefully that will change with age. Why not go on a few dates with singletons and see how great you feel when you find a connection with someone special who is freely available and doesn't need 'persuasion'. Just sayin' Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrgoodcat Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 (edited) @brokendreamz Immature? This is a real world we live in. If you don't pay your mortgage, I buy your house of dreams for 1/3rd the price you paid for it. If your girl is attracted to me and I like her, then you might lose her too. Come on.... With all that said, the girl is younger than me by 5-6 years and whoever is hitting after her is still a young guy. I know I have more to offer her. I spoke to her today, btw. We had a pleasant conversation for a few minutes. I will see her tomorrow later in the day and talk her up about what she likes to do what she plans to do for this Halloween, talk about how she's doing in school and what not or if she needs help with anything. Then, I will shift a conversation to just meeting as friends some time this or next week since I don't want to make her uncomfortable. Any other suggestions? Should I give her my number and say like "Call me if you need anything" so in case she changes her mind she can text me back and that would pretty much be a signal that she wants this thing to go further. I think that's a pretty good plan, don't you? I suck at reading women, but I'll be damned if I'm confusing her behavior for politeness. I really think she likes me. Edited September 13, 2011 by mrgoodcat Link to post Share on other sites
Author mrgoodcat Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 But as far as my theory here goes, it is being severely put to the test. I have to replay my ex-crushes from several years just to stay off of thinking dreamy thoughts about this girl. It's hard because I saw her and she looked evermore beautiful than before. ****, I have to really stop thinking of her on a regular basis. ***goes on to repeat his ex-crush's name over and over again**** Link to post Share on other sites
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