When a woman is 'making eyes' at you, how is it supposed to look?

[Ross PK]

So yeah, when a woman is making eyes at you (as in she's attracted to you, she's checking you out), how is it supposed to look?

 

Does it look any different from them just staring at you?

[Mme. Chaucer]

Actually, there are subtle differences from just regular staring. I think this is a reasonable depiction of what to look for from a girl who is "making eyes" and who is definitely interested:

 

http://cdn.davesdaily.com/pictures/756-ugly-face.jpg

[Ross PK]

I once did catch a girl looking at me but she kinda looked angry, like she didn't like me. I wonder what that could mean?

 

Could I look that hateable?

[alphamale]

you an her lock eyes for more than the normal gazing period...

[Ross PK]

you an her lock eyes for more than the normal gazing period...

 

Ok, cool.

 

Just wish I could maintain eye contact when I catch a woman looking at me, to see if she does maintain eye contact with me for more than the normal gazing period.

 

I've never been able to do it.

[mr.dream merchant]

Actually, there are subtle differences from just regular staring. I think this is a reasonable depiction of what to look for from a girl who is "making eyes" and who is definitely interested:

 

http://cdn.davesdaily.com/pictures/756-ugly-face.jpg

 

Please Mme, keep pictures of yourself for the "How would you rate me" threads. Thanks.

[SmileFace]

I don't know how can actually tell. I mean if I see a guy I may be interested I usually stare. Then look away real quick when he catches me . Then I stare some more.

However I also stare at dogs,little kids,the old guy on the bus who smells like urine, the girl with the nice body, and older gentlemen with the interesting face.

[Feelin Frisky]

Rule of thumb, look for evidence of a smile versus a smirk. A smile curls up on the edge and generally happens on both sides of the pie hole. A smirk will often only present on one side of the gob.

[Thedude22]

I barely ever see a girl smile at me, if that happens I can safely assume she's interested. When I check out a girl all I do is look, now when she looks back how the hell can you tell if she's interested or just looking at the person who is obviously looking at them.

 

I'd look back at an old hobo if I saw him staring at me, doesn't really signify attraction.

[alphamale]

bascially the more attractive you are the more "looks" you'll get for the opposite sex (or the same sex )....

 

i get my fair share of attention so its not a big deal for me. i can tell within a minute or two if a chick likes me or not

[Nexus One]

The problem is girls often look when you're not looking. I know this because when I walk somewhere in a public place with my mother she every now and then says: "You have no idea do you, you just have no idea." Then I ask, "No idea about what?", "About the fact that women are looking at you.", "Nonsense, I didn't see even one looking at me.", "Nexus, that's because they're doing it when you don't see it." I'm kind of clueless and oblivious about that kind of thing I think, but in my defense I can't know what I don't see.

 

The occasions you will catch their eyes are rare. I've only ever had one of those "movie moments" where a girl's glance and mine met the exact same time and the perfect timing of it just made us smile, we just knew what it meant, without speech, without thought. I will never forget that moment. I hope everyone will get to experience that at least once in their lifetime, because it's a cherishable memory.

 

That doesn't mean I've only ever seen one girl look at me, that's not what I'm saying. Most often when they're looking I have no idea why they are looking. If they're not smiling, they might as well be looking at me for practical reasons, like in order not to bump into me or something like that. I also often assume girls are merely looking just to see if a guy, in this case me, is looking at them. It doesn't have to mean they are attracted to me, so I really have no idea about their motives for looking unless it's really obvious.

 

I have really obvious examples too though. One day back in high school I was eating a sandwich during lunch break and I saw this girl drag along another girl by her arm and she stopped in front of me. Then she pointed at me and said: "That's him." I'd say that one was pretty obvious.

 

The same thing happened a few years later in university. One day I walked into a building and there was a group of female students standing around, about 20 or so. And one girl got all worked up and I heard her say to that group quite loudly, that's him, that's him! I'd say that one was pretty obvious too. I had never seen that girl in my life before though. I was in a hurry, had to hand in a paper. At that point in my life I didn't really focus on girls, but nevertheless I was intrigued by it.

 

With one particular girl I had it totally wrong. In high school I had a classmate that had a crush on me and it turned out that I was the ONLY ONE who didn't know. She was pretty obvious about it, but she was a quirky girl, a kind of hot quirky girl who wore high couture fashion, I'm not making this stuff up. I thought she was hot, but I didn't have a crush on her and assumed she behaved the way she did because she was "different". So one day I was sitting in front of her in class and at one moment I felt an arm clenching around my neck and I got pulled back and she tried to pull me onto her desk or something. Made me laugh, but I didn't get the clue, I just thought she was being her quirky self. At one point another classmate said to me: "Hey Nexus, she has a crush on you, can't you see that?" I was shocked to hear that, because I never got the clue and I didn't reciprocate.

 

Another situation where I did catch it was on a vacation at a lake. I was taking a walk around a lake with my brother and we passed two girls. One of them I found attractive and I just had to know if they found me attractive, so I walked past them and about 30 seconds later I turned around to see if they were looking. And they did, they had already turned around and had stopped and were staring. And in my mind I was like: "Yes!"

 

Another example was a former colleague that seemed to be into me. She was in her late 30's and I was still in university back then and was making some extra cash on the side at that company and I heard her say to another female colleague: "Oh my God this is so wrong, I'm falling for a student way younger than me.", then her colleague said: "Hey I thought you were only into superficial guys?", she then replied kind of insulted: "What? Nooooo!?".

 

Yet another example which I personally think was ambiguous, but which others would probably rate as obvious is the following. When I worked as an intern at a certain company with some fellow male students they got somewhat worked up about a woman in her 30's. She basically looked like what guys would call a "MILF". The other guys asked me: "If you got the chance, would you marry her?" I said: "No." They replied: "What?! you're crazy man!" and they gave me a look as if they thought I must be gay or something. However I just replied truthfully to the question. Sure she was attractive, but she also came off as a bit mentally unstable and had a continuous stressed out vibe to her. And I'm not going to tell them I'm going to freaking marry a woman I'm not into. Some guys are so superficial I can't believe it. For some guys it's enough when a woman is curvy and everything becomes blank before their eyes and they immediately want to marry the woman, regardless of any red flags whatsoever. Anyways. At a particular day she and I were alone in the office, everyone had to be somewhere else that day. Lunch came and we sat across each other at a lunch table making small talk. When suddenly she says: "Oh my, it's hot in here. My breasts are so hot." and she opens her blouse to show more cleavage and starts talking about her breasts. And to the best of my ability I make every effort to stare at her face and not at her breasts and I managed to stay aloof with a super hardcore effort. It's quite possible that she was trying to probe my reaction and see if I would "bite", which I didn't. After that things went back to normal.

 

I've also caught a female colleague in her 40's stare at me in the most dreamy way I have ever seen a woman stare at me. She had her elbow on her desk and her inner hand palm was supporting her chin and she was really obviously staring at me in a dreamy way. She sat only several feet away from me and I turned towards her to discuss something work related and she just kept staring like that. I didn't and don't have a crush on her, so yet again I tried to be aloof, because what else can you do? Giving her the wrong impression would be cruel.

 

Don't get me wrong though, by default I actually have no idea if I'm attractive and do need "feedback" like this to know whether women are actually attracted to me. And it's not like examples from high school and university count anymore, people age, so to get some feedback every now and then comes in handy to check if you can still attract the opposite sex. A tip to women I can give is that just staring is too ambiguous for men. If you want to make it clear to a guy you like him, you definitely need to smile too, otherwise we just don't have enough information to figure out why you are staring. Men look for obvious proof/signals, subtle signals often go unnoticed by men.

 

Regarding staring myself, I do it too. Just a few days ago I was sitting somewhere and two girls passed by me and one looked briefly at me and knew she had to go past me. After her brief glance she tried not to look at me, but had to smile while walking past me, because she anticipated I was going to watch her walk by. Looking back at it I think I've become more nonchalant about looking at girls over the years. What I'm still careful about though is looking at women who have a boyfriend, not because I'm afraid of their boyfriend, but mostly out of respect for the boyfriend. I'm not interested in girls who already have boyfriends. It's his girl and I don't want him to feel that I'm a threat in that respect, because I have no intention to.

Edited March 29, 2011 by Nexus One

[Knittress]

The occasions you will catch their eyes are rare. I've only ever had one of those "movie moments" where a girl's glance and mine met the exact same time and the perfect timing of it just made us smile, we just knew what it meant, without speech, without thought. I will never forget that moment. I hope everyone will get to experience that at least once in their lifetime, because it's a cherishable memory.

 

You mean the hypno-gaze? It's only happened to me a handful of times. Awwwwwwkward.

[Nexus One]

You mean the hypno-gaze? It's only happened to me a handful of times. Awwwwwwkward.

 

I don't know if it's a "hypno-gaze", it was more spontaneous and happy, but not hypnotic, although I must say that in that moment everything else faded away and only the other person "existed". I just see it as a happy spontaneous moment, or at least that's the way I experienced it.

[Mrlonelyone]

With one woman who I have written about here as "S" we had a moment like that you would see in the movies.

 

It was summer and I was in a horrible mood. We were both in community college. I was taking a summer chem class and she was a councilor for a summer day camp for small children.

 

I was thinking to myself that's it. No friends, no relationships, no fooling around. I am just going to keep my head down and not try to soc....

 

Then I saw her.

 

She was wearing these short cargo shorts, knee socks, long flowing hair walking oh so sassily. We locked eyes as we walked past eachother and both smiled really really big. I looked over my shoulder at her and she did at me. In unison.

 

I thought to myself how would I ever talk to this girl?

 

After we passed we did not just give that "over the shoulder" look back... we gave the full body spin around look back.

 

I was late to where I was going and her job was starting. I saw her around a couple times after that. It was not until months latter that we had Chem class together when I was able to say something to her. I had forgotten all about our first encounter. I only realized she was that same woman when she mentioned the job.

 

It was magical. It makes me feel less lonely to think about it.

 

That was back in 1999.

 

It's more than just a look... it's come hither body language too. As a rule if the woman gives you an over the shoulder look... that's the key to the difference between being friendly and attracted.

 

(Beware women who may not be available for a relationship will do the above too. It is instinctual and out of conscious control. I'll bet that it's happened to you and you just did not realize and know how to react.)

[Knittress]

I don't know if it's a "hypno-gaze", it was more spontaneous and happy, but not hypnotic, although I must say that in that moment everything else faded away and only the other person "existed". I just see it as a happy spontaneous moment, or at least that's the way I experienced it.

 

I'm not sure what it means, but it's only happened to me three times - twice with someone I was head-over-heels for but would never approach. Which might indicate that it's attraction-based, but then it happened once with a total stranger who I didn't even know what they looked like!

 

I was aware of nothing in the universe aside from the backs of their irises and neither of us could look away until something moved to interrupt our line of sight. It's intense, whatever it is.

 

I've noticed a milder one-sided version of it a few times from guys. They'll stop in their tracks and stare, with a zoned-out expression. THAT, OP, is a pretty obvious sign of someone being into you.

Edited March 29, 2011 by Knittress

[MistaDynamic]

So yeah, when a woman is making eyes at you (as in she's attracted to you, she's checking you out), how is it supposed to look?

 

Does it look any different from them just staring at you?

 

It's not just a look it's body language as well. Women will tend to preen themselves; stroke their hair,straighten their clothes,etc. Also they will look you in the eye and when your eye meets theirs they will tend look down and away.

 

I had happen few times but sometimes when a woman who interested and is with man she will try hard not to look in your eye but can't help herself by looking in your direction. It's obvious she wants to look at you but feels guilty for doing so. This happens mostly with younger women though,teenagers to early 20's. It's funny as hell when you experience it though.

 

Also if a women is staring at you and she doesn't have an odd look on he face she's definitely interested. A women will only stare at you for certain reasons a) they afraid of you and watching you to ensure you don't harm them. b) there is something odd or funny about you or c) they interested in you. And then there's always the rare look where they think you know you from somewhere and are not sure.

[Content]

The smile is a good sign but i get confused in certain places wheter there doign it for their job

 

Like today i went to the dermatologist today and the girl whos job it is to say for me to see the doctor and ask me questions when i get in the room she smiled at me when she saw me then as i was leaving the place i saw her at the door she saw me smiled pretty big and said goodbye

 

Probably means nothign its her job to be friendly though its not like shes a waitress working for tips who knows

[Star Gazer]

When a woman is interested in you, her eyes will look like she's kinda daydreaming about you and smiling at you...with her eyes. Like this, or like this, like this, or if you're a gay dude, like this. HTH

[Ross PK]

How long is the normal gazing period?

 

Rule of thumb, look for evidence of a smile versus a smirk. A smile curls up on the edge and generally happens on both sides of the pie hole. A smirk will often only present on one side of the gob.

 

What would a smirk mean?

[Ross PK]

With one woman who I have written about here as "S" we had a moment like that you would see in the movies.

 

It was summer and I was in a horrible mood. We were both in community college. I was taking a summer chem class and she was a councilor for a summer day camp for small children.

 

I was thinking to myself that's it. No friends, no relationships, no fooling around. I am just going to keep my head down and not try to soc....

 

Then I saw her.

 

She was wearing these short cargo shorts, knee socks, long flowing hair walking oh so sassily. We locked eyes as we walked past eachother and both smiled really really big. I looked over my shoulder at her and she did at me. In unison.

 

I thought to myself how would I ever talk to this girl?

 

After we passed we did not just give that "over the shoulder" look back... we gave the full body spin around look back.

 

I was late to where I was going and her job was starting. I saw her around a couple times after that. It was not until months latter that we had Chem class together when I was able to say something to her. I had forgotten all about our first encounter. I only realized she was that same woman when she mentioned the job.

 

It was magical. It makes me feel less lonely to think about it.

 

That was back in 1999.

 

It's more than just a look... it's come hither body language too. As a rule if the woman gives you an over the shoulder look... that's the key to the difference between being friendly and attracted.

 

(Beware women who may not be available for a relationship will do the above too. It is instinctual and out of conscious control. I'll bet that it's happened to you and you just did not realize and know how to react.)

 

I've never seen a woman look back at me, it's never happened in the whole of my life, which makes me feel sad.

 

Sure, I've never looked back myself, so it could have happened when I had my back to them, but surely if women have done this to me, then I would've seen it happen when I was facing them?

[Ross PK]

The smile is a good sign but i get confused in certain places wheter there doign it for their job

 

Like today i went to the dermatologist today and the girl whos job it is to say for me to see the doctor and ask me questions when i get in the room she smiled at me when she saw me then as i was leaving the place i saw her at the door she saw me smiled pretty big and said goodbye

 

Probably means nothign its her job to be friendly though its not like shes a waitress working for tips who knows

 

Most girls in their jobs do this with me too, but they're just being friendly/doing their job because I see them do the same with old women too.

[Ross PK]

When a woman is interested in you, her eyes will look like she's kinda daydreaming about you and smiling at you...with her eyes. Like this, or like this, like this, or if you're a gay dude, like this. HTH

 

I've never experienced any of those kinds of looks.

 

When you guys say that when they smile while looking at you it means they're interested, do you mean that they need to already be smiling when you look at them, or do you mean that as soon as you look at them it is then that they smile?

[MistaDynamic]

When you guys say that when they smile while looking at you it means they're interested, do you mean that they need to already be smiling when you look at them, or do you mean that as soon as you look at them it is then that they smile?

 

Same difference. It doesn't matter.

 

I've never experienced any of those kinds of looks.

 

Then maybe you're not doing anything for women to notice you. I don't know if this applies to you,it's harsh but true, however some people need to hear the truth.

 

Women Do The Choosing

 

Looks Matter

[Ross PK]

Same difference. It doesn't matter.

 

 

 

Then maybe you're not doing anything for women to notice you. I don't know if this applies to you,it's harsh but true, however some people need to hear the truth.

 

Women Do The Choosing

 

Looks Matter

 

I always thought a women just needs to be physically attracted to you for her to make eyes at you.

[Ross PK]

Same difference. It doesn't matter.

 

 

 

Then maybe you're not doing anything for women to notice you. I don't know if this applies to you,it's harsh but true, however some people need to hear the truth.

 

Women Do The Choosing

 

Looks Matter

 

Are you the guy in the videos? Good videos btw.