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Reload this Page went out with girl 6x's , found out she might have bf during the ti


joel

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not sure what happen but here goes:

met this girl off a social meetup group and i emailed her without knowing her"hey wassup, nice pic how are you liking meetup, want to meetup for coffee sometime" ttyl"

i met up with her and we hung out 4x's once for coffee, another movie and dinner and 3rd time just walking around univ campus, eat out. of all the 4xs i paid-she paid for movie once

i don't hear from this girl for 2 months-i ask her to hang out via email but she says shes busy, till yeseterday she emailed me saying how i am and lets meetup-finally she initiates

we go out and eat cheesecake -i pay. she says we are just friends ,but even i still pay and i see she expects it too-

i go home on facebook and sees her pictures and i see shes very close to this other older guy 40 year old chubbier guy -they are hugging , holding hands...etc--i am guessing this is her bf. she never told me she had a bf, but we still went out for like 5x's. they went to states together.

 

so why she go out with me 5x's and not tell me this. did she go out with the guy for 2 months and they broke up and then she goes back to me since i am backup guy. the fourth time i tried to hold her hand she rejects me,but with this guy i guess she allows it. lol weird

basically she went out with me like 5-6x's but never told me she had a bf . i just found out on facebook while looking at the pics

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GorillaTheater
If someone told me we were "just friends" I'd be asking the server for separate checks :)

 

You beat me to it; this is exactly right.

 

Forget it, man. Regardless of what's going on exactly, it's pretty clear that in her view, there's nothing going on between the two of you.

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Because you pay for her.

 

The tradition is men pay on dates. Be aware that many women will take advantage of this.

 

When you go out with a chick, make it clear it's a date, and not a friend date, as in with romantic intentions. If she wants to make it a friend date, you split the bill.

 

What she's doing is leaving things ambiguous, and letting you assume. It's a common and useful tactic, I use it often myself, and so should you. The reason is - it's legal. She didn't trick you into paying for her, you willingly did it.

 

To counter that - be direct. If a woman is directly asking me the right questions, I will not lie. Few people, men or women, will lie when faced with a direct question (but some will, so be aware). But if she doesn't ask, I'm not obligated to disclose my intentions or any information.

 

For example, awhile back I went on a first date. We decided to meet each other half way because we live far apart. 10 minutes before the date, when I was waiting for her at the restaurant (don't be late, that looks bad), she called to ask if she could bring a friend. I told her ok, but then this would not be a date; we'd be friends hanging out. So we hung out, but I only paid for myself, because I made it clear it wasn't a date. Some guys may try to be the "cool guy" and pay for her and her friend, and end up getting used as a free meal ticket for two. I never called her back. "Bring a friend" is not something you do on a first date.

 

Generally men will happily have sex with women that they're not interested in dating. Generally women will happily accept food, drinks, material goods, attention/time, emotional support, services, from men they're not interested in dating.

 

Know where you stand before you invest, that goes for both men and women.

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