Guest Posted July 9, 2006 Share Posted July 9, 2006 I have a friend with two little kids. Whenever one has a birthday, I am expected to buy them both gifts. That's because one gets jealous of what the other has. I don't think that's necessary and I think it doesn't teach children patience. You can't always have what you want when you want it. Well my friend disagrees. She says they are too little to understand that. Last week the older one (age 7) had a birthday and I came with a stuffed animal and a game for the older one. THe mother took the stuffed animal and said we'll give this to the younger child so she is not jealous and give just the game to the older. I resented that. Later I talked to her and she said in the future, please bring something for both of them and not just one. It saves me a headache. What should I tell her? Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted July 9, 2006 Share Posted July 9, 2006 I agree her idea is wacko, but when you are in her home, you really do have to abide by her requests for what she wants for her children. If she says "no guns" or "no Barbies", you should respect that. If she says, "bring one for each of them", then you should do that. You can make one of the presents smaller. BOTTOM LINE: It is her right to rear them and train them any odd way she wants. They may grom up expecting to be the bride at every wedding and the corpse at every funeral, but that will be their and her problem, not yours. Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted July 9, 2006 Share Posted July 9, 2006 I too agree that it is wrong for the mother to have you bring gifts for both children. That basically caters to the jealousy instead of teaching them not to get jealous of each other. It doesn't make sense for one child to look forward to their sibling's birthday with the EXPECTATION that they too will be getting gifts as though it was their date of birth. As far as what to tell the mother, you can tell her how you feel but that you will respect her request, which means you will spread your gift budget between the two of the children instead of doubling it (kind of a warning not to expect as nice a gift as you'd get if it were for only one of them). Link to post Share on other sites
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