Falling For My Friend

[Nufc1892]

Hi I know there has been a few posts on this subject but i would really like some advice if possible.

 

Basically there is a girl at work who i like and she seems to like me alot too but over the past few months we have become quite close friends, also i am really shy and find it difficult to express my feelings.

 

It started about 8 months ago when she started making excuses as to why she did not want to go back to the office and have lunch with the others, and the excuses she used were things that had never been a problem before, like saying "i dont need to go back there today so if you don't then shall we stay here ".She would either call me or just bump into me during the morning and ask what i was doing for lunch. I'd would always try and ask her if she was ok and she would always say that she was fine. Even though it was quite obvious that this may not be true.

 

There seems to be a lot of flirting and eye contact between us. There are many times were we have held eye contact for a long time after a conversation, or i've looked up to see her watching me only for her to look away. She seems to like teasing me and trying to prove that she is better than me at things or that she works harder than me even though she claims not to be competative. I am not a "Touchy Feely" person but when she teases me i might squeeze her hips, her arm or shoulder or stroke her poney tail and she never seems to try and pull her self away or say anything, normally she just giggles and carries on.

 

Having spent a lot of time with her i get the impression that like me she is quite shy and private and to a certain extent is unconfident about herself. That being said she seems quite happy to tell me alot about herself, things that she likes etc. She has even told me her nickname that her family use for her. She also tells me alot about her family and about people who unless i was her bf i would never expect to meet. I get the impression from talking to other people at work that she does not tell them some of the things she tells me. Its as if she talk to me first above anyone else who we work with

 

I have also noticed that when we go out with other work people, if we get time on our own we might starting talking about friends and family or what we are doing at the weekend, then when the others return she will stop talking or change the subject to something more general and less personal to her. To a certain extent this can be quite embarrasing because it is obvious to the others that we have been talking about something else. Ocassionally people will always ask me whats going on between us which i find unconfortable because when i say nothing i get the impression they dont belive me. On one ocassion another girl at work kept implying to us both that we were spending to much time together to be just friends. During this time my friend said nothing even after the other girl had gone.

 

I have never had the guts to tell her my true feelings as i dont want to ruin what is obviously a good friendship. However a few weeks ago i mentioned that i had been to an art gallery. My friend said she had never been to one so i said i'd take her if she liked and she said yes. however when i asked her again if she would still like to go she said that she was not sure if art was her thing. She then proceeded to spend the rest of the day teasing and flirting with me.

 

Sorry if you have heard all this before, but some advice would be much appreciated

[Guest]

its ok iknow how you feel and I've been looking for advice too, but honestly I really think you should ask a few questions, or tell her and if she looks angry and shocked just say you where j.k.ing, or get a buddy to find out for you

[AwkwardMan]

Take her out to dinner. She likes you. Watch a movie at your place. She'll be in your arms in no time.

[dj222]

take my advice. i was really shy like you before but you gotta tell her your feelings now. just tell her you like her. i know it's hard to do that but just do it. trust me! you will thank me tomorrow.

[Marissa101]

Heya!

I have fallin for a mate before and now he and I aren't very close. But in my advise is basically ask her out and if she said no it wasent ment to be and just ask if u guys could still be mates. If u feel a conection go for it man!!!

[greaser14]

Good lord man don't wait. a good woman is hard to find. examine your feelings. You don't want to lose her friendship? well do you want her as just a friend? nobody remembers second place. if you drag it out because of fear then someone else is gonna snatch her up and then you get to be her shoulder to cry on when some a**hole is treating her like dirt or if he's a keeper then you get to listen about how happy she is while your wonderin what exactly it was that you were waitin for because you could treat her ten times better than that loser.

If you know her so well you should know what she likes. Take her somewhere where she'll feel comfortable first. if all goes well, take her to a venue where you can express your feelings. don't be a stalker though. ask her casually. talk to her like a person and you'll be fine. then you can reach an understanding of where both of your feelings are understood.