Can't stop thinking about him

[Nixy]

I met this guy on Instagram on Christmas day last year. I don't usually answer dms but I thought, hey it's Christmas what the heck, and I responded. We spoke literally every day since, and almost all day from that day until last month.

We spoke about literally anything under the sun. It basically was like talking to your best friend or the guy version of yourself. We shared everything with each other.

We stay in different provinces and were gonna meet up over eater but he couldn't leave because of work, and he did apologise and I forgave him.

Fast forward to June, and we were both kinda broke, waiting for our next payday to show up, so he did not have data to communicate with me. But a few days before payday I saw that I watched my Instagram stories and posted his own. I was really hurt that he didn't think to at least say "hi" to me and I told him about it. I told him that I was done with him and his friendship, event though I hated doing that and not talking to him. He wanted us to start our friendship again cause he wanted to make up for making me feel ignored by the person I spoke to everyday for half a year, so I said fine.

Things kinda went back to normal, and he did tell me about how stressful his work has become, but then he rand out of data again. I did send him a message and he just read it. I don't know what to do now because I miss him so very much.

I know work can be stressful, but I want him to talk to me. But on the other hand I don't want to seem that I am forcing myself in his life when he doesn't want me there.

Should I just ignore the fact that he just read my good morning message and text him "hi"? I really do miss him and can't stop thinking about him.

 

Please help

[d0nnivain]

Sadly you are caught up in this fantasy. It's wonderful to have somebody to talk to & he made you feel special. But it's not real. You don't even know him. You just know who you think he is. The attention is still addicting.

 

He's not a good prospect. He's too far away. There is not enough $$ to close the distance. He's thoughtless & unreliable.

 

Like any other (bad) habit, it will take time to wean yourself from him. But you must. Go out & do things. Spend time with local people. In time you will replace his empty promises with a real person you can actually see & spend time with.

[Nixy]

Thank you. I think I needed to hear it from a stranger

[preraph]

He probably senses that you're becoming more attached than the situation warrants, so he'd not comfortable with continuing it on this level. Sorry. Internet chat relationships are rarely what we hope they are.

[rainbow12]

It's a bit odd that since he has no data he can still read your messages.

He's avoiding you because he's bored. You even catch him when he uploaded a story on instagram and apparently he's meant to have no data? I don't believe it. Since he messaged you on instagram it's a huge give away he's doing it to someone else on instagram because if he can randomly message someone on instagram he can do it to another woman. I do agree with dalmatian, you need to find someone local and....not rely on a guy you barely even know.

[Foxhall]

Its never good to start getting upset about things like how quick a person is to reply to texts and are they reading your messages and so on,

 

worries of this nature can wear a person down and cause unnecessary stress and anxiety,

 

I would suggest finding a way to dealing with anxiety first before you engage in dating correspondence,

 

having a certain amount of detachment/not caring/ not being overly dependent on anyone or anything is always a useful mentality,

 

even more so in this case, someone you have never even met,

[Beendaredonedat]

Please stop wasting your good dating years on the computer talking to someone to the point you are now obsessed with someone you've never even met in real life. For all you know, he stinks of B.O., has rotten teeth and eats the warts off a toad for breakfast. Words without actions to back them up as the truth are just words... take them with a grain of salt and refrain from over investing emotionally with a stranger whose actions have never matched up with the words that made you THINK he was real.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

He's probably totally fake and has fabricated who he actually is (i.e. Catfish). Happens all the time.

[Watercolors]

Have you ever seen the MTV tv show Catfish? It's about this problem of investing emotionally in profiles people create online to fool people, and exposing those catfishers.

 

The best way to meet someone to date is through social networks or groups like Meetup. Stop relying on your online social networks. Too many fakers on those.