LoveShack.org Community Forums

Reload this Page LoveShack.org Community Forums > Platonic > Friendship

How did your best friend become your ex-best friend?


Friendship Having issues with a friend? Get it off your chest!

 
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 17th December 2017, 8:05 PM   #1
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 15
How did your best friend become your ex-best friend?

I am asking this question in regards to a best friend losing interest in you or contacting you less to hang out or chat with. I have known my best friend for many years and a year ago I moved closer to him so that we could hang out more often, but that hasn't been the case. He is married and has a 2 year old daughter now. I am the opposite (not married, no girlfriend, and no children). I can understand his daughter and wife taking up a lot of his time, as well as his full time job. We don't chat everyday and sometimes several days may pass in between conversations. Most of the time when I ask him if he wants to get together, he can't. He also does not invite me to hang out as often. Even though he lives 20 minutes away, I usually only see him in person every 1-2 months. I feel like we're living two different lifestyles, and thus I feel him somewhat drifting away. Does anyone have a similar story? If so, what is the current status of your friendship?
rkm86 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 17th December 2017, 8:17 PM   #2
Established Member
 
CautiouslyOptimistic's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 4,126
Divorce.

My BFF became my sister in law when I got married, and when we divorced, our friendship suffered greatly. It still hurts to think about it. We are still friends on Facebook....I've known her and her whole huge family since I was 12.....but we are no longer "in real life" friends.

I had another very close friendship end after the divorce too. She was friends with my ex-H before she was friends with me, and it just became awkward I guess, and I also played a part because I really pulled away from everyone during that time.
CautiouslyOptimistic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 17th December 2017, 8:55 PM   #3
Established Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: Antipodes
Posts: 8,696
This pretty much describes all my husband's friendships. Despite not seeing them so often, he still refers to them as best friends.
basil67 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 18th December 2017, 9:22 PM   #4
Established Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 18,774
Most people with a spouse, a job and kids literally don't have enough time for any of those things. So if they have extra time, they put it there. It is a sucky situation for a friend, and believe me I sympathize, but that's real life. My best friend lives 5 minutes from me and I see her once every 3 months maybe. She's frantically running all the time. I myself have two jobs so I do get it. But my friends are one notch higher on my priority list than someone with kids. She does at least include me on some holidays, which is sweet. She does what she can.

Try your best to start new hobbies, activities, sports, join a softball or bowling league and just try to make new acquaintances to hang out with.
__________________
"I care not much for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not better for it." -- Abraham Lincoln
preraph is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 18th December 2017, 10:02 PM   #5
Established Member
 
RecentChange's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: San Francisco Bay Area
Posts: 4,675
My "best friend" since I was 12 is still my best friend.

But we hardly ever see each other despite living close by. We talk only occasionally.

We have a shared history, an understanding that none of our other friends can match.

As for your circumstance, I don't contact any of my friends that often - and the ones popping out babies? Some of which I have literally not seen since the birth.

They are busy raising kids, I am busy with my career and "adult" social life. They don't go to concerts, and cocktail bars, and week day nights out like we all used to - and I still do. Their lives are full with family stuff. And mine is full with my husband, career, hobbies and social life.

I still love them, and we still count on each other for support, but the days of hanging out on a whim are long gone.
RecentChange is offline   Reply With Quote
 

Bookmarks

Thread Tools
Display Modes

 

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Having psychological problems with a friend talking/hanging out with another friend. PuppetLife Friendship 22 1st September 2014 6:48 PM
I Have Strong Feelings for my Friend, Who is Dating my Other Friend- Moving Forward?) BonanzaBean Coping 0 26th September 2012 12:24 PM
my best friend drilled my guy friend at checkout line now he wont talk to me dakotamaiden Dating 16 21st December 2008 1:38 PM
Good friend from college is tryin to make me date her friend..should i? Brady_to_Moss Dating 5 13th August 2008 2:18 PM
Super complicated friend/cousin/other friend cheating...long Yasdnil Friendship 2 14th March 2006 6:19 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:01 AM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.


Copyright © 1997-2018 LoveShack.org. All Rights Reserved.