My co worker is a sneaky b****!

[ShyOne82]

She barely talks to me at work but wants to contact my best friend through facebook! That darn facebook I tell you.. Anywho, couple days ago I posted a pic of my best friend (guy) and I at a community event. On monday she told me she thought the guy in my pic was cute. I told her I was gonna tell him what he said (jokingly, but not serious about it) I gave her history on our relationship (sexual about 3 years ago) and we remain very good friends. We were having girl talk and I kinda told her how large he was and laughed about not fooling with that again... (wrong move)

 

As soon as I get home my friend is upset, asking me if Im trying to hook him up bcz a girl on my list sent him a request and started asking him tons of questions about dating... When I looked, it was my damn Co worker...WTF?!

 

To me, I think it is very shady of her to go behind my back and try to talk to MY FRIEND. When I was telling her about something that happened between him and I, she was saying "ohhh I couldnt deal with that" But she rushes home to contact my friend. Of course he is forwarding every message she sends and I saw where she wanted to meet up with him and take him back to her house! She's an idiot.. and it makes her look like a slut when she knows I used to deal with him.

 

Granted, we are not friends, and she owes me nothing.. but I have to see her everyday. My friend could sleep with her and never contact her again bcz guys do that.. but I have to see this chic and its already awkward. That morning she told me she spoke to my friend but gave no details.. (i already know but is acting clueless) She tells a co worker who im close to more than what she has told me.. so what does that tell u? She knows she is being a sneaky whore and is dumb bcz every little thing she tells my other co worker, its coming right back to me.

 

Awhile back I had asked if her bf at the time new any guys to hook me up with as i didnt go out much and she never got back to me on that.. I didnt ask her to hook me up with her friends or guys she previously had sex with! Never got back to me on that but has the audacity to contact ppl I am associated with. She's embarrassing herself. I advised my friend to be nice and shut it down as nicely as possible bcz she is cool with our boss and I dont trust her. I dont like drama, but I am tempted to ask her why she did that and if she can stop contacting him. BTW, my friend and I have rules.. we dont hook up with people we are associated with in any way bcz our friendship is THAT important to us.. Does anyone think I am wrong to feel this way? Lunch was very awkward she wasnt talkng much and didnt say bye to anyone when she clocked out.. She's a sneaky b*tch

Edited July 24, 2013 by ShyOne82

[Treasa]

I think that you and your friend are more than friends, even if you don't do anything romantically or sexually. I have a male "best friend" too, and this year I finally realized I could never be with another guy, and he could never be with another girl.

 

Secondly, I think you should stop discussing penis sizes, sex and romance, and anything else you wouldn't want getting out at work. My close colleagues know who my best friend is, but they don't know anything more than his first name or how he acts (the few that have met him).

 

Keep your work life and your personal life separate from each other.

[ShyOne82]

I think that you and your friend are more than friends, even if you don't do anything romantically or sexually. I have a male "best friend" too, and this year I finally realized I could never be with another guy, and he could never be with another girl.

 

Secondly, I think you should stop discussing penis sizes, sex and romance, and anything else you wouldn't want getting out at work. My close colleagues know who my best friend is, but they don't know anything more than his first name or how he acts (the few that have met him).

 

Keep your work life and your personal life separate from each other.

 

Larry is my best friend, my ONLY friend out here and no we are not more than friends.. He and I date whoever we want.. Like I said, our friendship is important to us and we both understand the complications of being of the opposite sex and try to avoid the drama..

 

I dont have conversations like this all the time.. still doesnt give her the right to contact my buddy for sex. My boss and 2 other co workers are on my facebook and I dont have any issues with them.

[Eggplant]

Do not friend coworkers on FB. If you must, create a separate "business" FB profile.

 

Do not have personal conversations with coworkers, or at least proceed with caution. Personal interaction leads to drama. You want a drama-free workplace.

 

Just grin and move past this issue. Everybody will forget it, and if they don't, hang around other people.

[ShyOne82]

There's your mistake right there. Stop talking about your personal life at work!

 

 

So if I wear a miniskirt downtown and get raped, it would be my fault too huh? I can talk about whatever the **** I want to talk about.. doesnt give people the right to take action.. If this didnt occur at work its still WRONG. She saw the pic on my profile BEFORE I TALKED ABOUT ANYTHING and was going to do what she wanted .. Give me a break with that dont talk at work bull.. Everyone there knows shes a mess BECAUSE THEY TALK ABOUT HER. Now that I know what type of person she is i wont be talking to her like that anymore.

[ShyOne82]

I take ownership of saying too much, BUT that whore needs to take ownership as well... everyone talks at work.. give me a break.. gossip galore.. that doesnt mean we go and try to **** peoples husbands, boyfriends, and friends bcz of some info... ugh

[tbf]

Do not friend coworkers on FB. If you must, create a separate "business" FB profile.

 

Do not have personal conversations with coworkers, or at least proceed with caution. Personal interaction leads to drama. You want a drama-free workplace.

 

Just grin and move past this issue. Everybody will forget it, and if they don't, hang around other people.

Another way to handle this would be to split coworkers to a linkedin profile and social friends to a private Fb profile. This gives you an excuse to punt every coworker off Fb if you previously inform them of your linkedin profile and ask for their contact information.

[ShyOne82]

Another way to handle this would be to split coworkers to a linkedin profile and social friends to a private Fb profile. This gives you an excuse to punt every coworker off Fb if you previously inform them of your linkedin profile and ask for their contact information.

 

 

One of my co workers ended up becoming a good friend and we hang out outside of work. I know I need to be less trusting and def make a separate account asap. Thanks

[Cressida]

I think it was a mistake you made when you told her about your past experience with this guy. You can have a confidante at work, a friend or someone you've known from before/years, but don't put your personal, intimate details on wallpaper (like his penis size?). Even if you think it doesn't mean anything, let me tell you it does. If she is this sneaky who knows who she's friends with, perhaps someone you're not? And who knows what she says to those people/that person about you? At work, I mean.

Why would you tell a woman you consider a mess, a whore and a slut tales from your sex life? People like her are to be avoided, not entertained with stories. Sorry if I come off as blunt but you need to control yourself. How do you know he will not end up having some sort of affair with her and then you'll lose your friend AND have some weird time at work?

I suggest you take care of yourself and keep your guard up about these details in your life. As for your friend, if he wants her to stop bugging him he should have the b@lls to say it straight up, not to forward you the messages.

 

You can tell her at work that she's bugging your friend and it's embarrassing. Why does it bother you she insists on contacting your friend? He should do something about it, not you. Let her fall on her own nose and you keep doing your work as if nothing ever happened.

[It's Just Me]

I don't get any of this, and maybe it's my age, but...

 

1. Why would you 'friend' someone you don't like or for whom you have very little respect?

2. Why do you feel that you own your male friend, like he's your property or something?

3. Why do you care if he sleeps with her or not? They're both adults. Let them figure it out.

4. If your friend truly wasn't interested, why didn't he just ignore the email and the request from your coworker? I know I would have.

5. How would any of this have been different if you'd been at a bar with a bunch of friends (including him), and your coworker had showed up and started talking to him?

 

Just trying to understand where all the agony is coming from. Something is missing from this puzzle.

[ShyOne82]

I think it was a mistake you made when you told her about your past experience with this guy. You can have a confidante at work, a friend or someone you've known from before/years, but don't put your personal, intimate details on wallpaper (like his penis size?). Even if you think it doesn't mean anything, let me tell you it does. If she is this sneaky who knows who she's friends with, perhaps someone you're not? And who knows what she says to those people/that person about you? At work, I mean.

Why would you tell a woman you consider a mess, a whore and a slut tales from your sex life? People like her are to be avoided, not entertained with stories. Sorry if I come off as blunt but you need to control yourself. How do you know he will not end up having some sort of affair with her and then you'll lose your friend AND have some weird time at work?

I suggest you take care of yourself and keep your guard up about these details in your life. As for your friend, if he wants her to stop bugging him he should have the b@lls to say it straight up, not to forward you the messages.

 

You can tell her at work that she's bugging your friend and it's embarrassing. Why does it bother you she insists on contacting your friend? He should do something about it, not you. Let her fall on her own nose and you keep doing your work as if nothing ever happened.

 

EXACTLLYYYYY I found out she was like this after the fact duhhhh why would I tell her that if I knew she was a slut. And my friend told me he let her down nicely becz she was friends with the boss.. Its been taken care of already.. I posted this days ago and shoulda gave an update. lol She lied and said something about "focusing on herself" when my other co worker asked if she met up with him. The truth is he let her down nicely and disappeared lol (blocked her) and didnt want to tell the girl that SMH. such a liar

[ShyOne82]

I don't get any of this, and maybe it's my age, but...

 

1. Why would you 'friend' someone you don't like or for whom you have very little respect?

2. Why do you feel that you own your male friend, like he's your property or something?

3. Why do you care if he sleeps with her or not? They're both adults. Let them figure it out.

4. If your friend truly wasn't interested, why didn't he just ignore the email and the request from your coworker? I know I would have.

5. How would any of this have been different if you'd been at a bar with a bunch of friends (including him), and your coworker had showed up and started talking to him?

 

Just trying to understand where all the agony is coming from. Something is missing from this puzzle.

 

I think its ur age

 

1. Everything was decent before she went behind my back

2. We dont OWN each other.. we've been thru enough and dont want uneccessary drama. We cherish our friendship. We have this rule where we dont deal with anyone we are associated with bcz of potential drama and having to hear about it from the other person.

3. That answers #2 He's talking to a new female right now and I dont care.. I dont know her she's not betraying me in any way and Im happy for him. Larry doesnt even want me to talk to his friends. Prime example, this one guy he hangs out with always talks about me.. with rude comments suggesting he wants to sleep with me etc and he gets annoyed when he hears about it.. NOT cuz he likes me but bcz we are close friends.. u dont want to hear ur brother or sister talking about who they want to **** and push up on ur friends its just weird and thats how it feels.

4. LOL if I was around she wouldnt have done anything.. she wouldve waited til i wasnt .. and that in itself shows she's being sneaky.. if it wasnt a problem she would do all that in my presence.. she wouldnt dare. and I'm glad he dissed her

 

My friend took care of this days ago and problem solved. As for my co worker she hasnt been herself and most likely knows that i am aware of everything.