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Adding coworkers on Facebook/social media


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Where I work a couple colleagues want to add me to Facebook. I am not a social media person, may post things once a year and widely just use the chat to converse with (send vacation pics to) to friends/family who aren't close by.

 

But out of curiosity what's the cons and are there really any pros to adding colleagues to your social media be it Facebook, Instagram, etc.

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In my own personal experience I have regretted adding coworkers to social media. I did at my last job as an experiment and it totally sucked because some people would add you but others wouldn't. They would have some lame excuse why they would add the coworker sitting next to me but not me. In my department it really created a division and over all felt like school yard stuff again.

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I block my employees straight away. I want to keep space between business and personal life. I don't desire for them to be involved or snooping in my off time.

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JustGettingBy

I find it best to play it safe and avoid it. I use social media for personal use, and like keeping it separate from work. Its the same reason I also avoid dating co workers.

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But out of curiosity what's the cons and are there really any pros to adding colleagues to your social media be it Facebook, Instagram, etc.

 

I use social media to connect with folks far away - pictures of my grandkids, chat with friends that have moved, etc.

 

No such need with co-workers you see every day. If they want to bore you with vacation pictures, let 'em do it in person...

 

Mr. Lucky

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Eternal Sunshine

At my last job, I added a lot of people. Big mistake. It all felt like high school. People would post pictures of social events where they invited you a few weeks ago but then not anymore....while they invited everyone else. Then when I had to work with those people I kind of disliked them. Plus everything I posted had to go through the lenses of "would I want all my bosses to know this?".

 

So when I started my current role, I decided "zero additions to social media". Few have requested, I politely declined and said that I have a rule of not adding co-workers. Because I am not singling anyone out, people have accepted it with no issues.

 

There is nothing to gain and everything to lose.

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I'm friends with lots of my co workers and my boss. I've never had any issues over it. I don't understand why people get so wound up over social media and who wants to be their cyber friend. I really couldn't care less, it's just a place where I can share nice photos or videos of my dog being a nutter.

I'm even friends with an ex workmate of mine who is a cheat and bully who I can't stand in real life! (She requested me.) She's also a show off on her page. Lol!!

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Thanks for the thoughts. I didn't see any real value of putting co workers on social media. Not just as I don't really use it but also because I wouldn't call any of them actual friends. We don't do anything outside of work together. They're, at best, associates.

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RecentChange

I don’t add any coworkers to my social media accounts.

 

NONE

 

Even the ones I count as friends .

 

My career means a lot to me - I have spent the last 15 years scratching my way up the corporate ladder - I wouldn’t want that to jeopardized by a dumb social media post.

 

Also, I keep work and social life separate. I don’t hang out with coworkers outside of work (or work socials - our team having a dinner or happy hour is different).

 

I also don’t talk about my personal life much at work etc.

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No such need with co-workers you see every day. If they want to bore you with vacation pictures, let 'em do it in person...

 

:lmao::lmao::lmao:

 

I have a fantastic group of coworkers. We joke that many of us have known each other longer than we’ve known our partners. Some of us see each other more than we see our partners. Needless to say, we are all Facebook friends.

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Trail Blazer

I have always done it in the past and never had an issue. It probably depends on what industry you work in.

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Depends. I have no problem adding coworkers, but I also don't post anything to social media. Like, at all.

 

 

But if I was more active, hell no would I add them.

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Eternal Sunshine

It really depends if you plan on progressing your career or are just happy to earn money and stay at the same role. If it's latter, you can afford to be relaxed. Most people I know are just happy to hold down a job that's vaguely in their field of study. Come 5pm, they are out.

 

 

It also depends if you have a "high end" job. In really desirable, professional companies, almost nobody is even going to attempt to add you on FB.

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Trail Blazer

I honestly couldn't think of anything worse than working in an office and dealing with all the politics involved. I've always been a "hands on" guy and my work reflects this.

 

Although I have an associate's degree, I'm so much happier applying my trade and working with a good bunch of guys, some whom I can consider very good friends. We all have a laugh on FB, tag each other in silly memes and generally not take life too seriously.

 

My ex-wife was a taxation lawyer for the IRS and she was very careful about who she befriended on social media. I know that she did have a few FB friends from her work.

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Eternal Sunshine
I honestly couldn't think of anything worse than working in an office and dealing with all the politics involved. I've always been a "hands on" guy and my work reflects this.

 

Although I have an associate's degree, I'm so much happier applying my trade and working with a good bunch of guys, some whom I can consider very good friends. We all have a laugh on FB, tag each other in silly memes and generally not take life too seriously.

 

My ex-wife was a taxation lawyer for the IRS and she was very careful about who she befriended on social media. I know that she did have a few FB friends from her work.

 

 

Most people have your attitude. I go to work to move up the ladder. If I am not getting anywhere in 2-3 years, I'm out no matter how many laughs I had.

 

 

Nothing wrong with either attitude, from life experience I'm the weird one :D

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I just trust my gut feeling. I'm adding some co-workers, but not all of them. That always worked well for me.

 

 

 

I remember only one occasion where I regretted adding somebody. But reget is probably even too strong a word because it was just one click to de-friend that person and no harm was done ;)

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I have a FB account where I never ever post anything and am happy to add most people out of politeness. I also mention ahead of time that I’m hardly ever on there.

 

I have an Instagram where I only add family and close friends.

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it was just one click to de-friend that person and no harm was done ;)

 

Since I'm in my 60's and not the target demographic, I'll ask this -

 

- is it harder for a "friend" to accept not being added in the first place or being ultimately de-friended?

 

It would seem the latter would be more problematic...

 

Mr. Lucky

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Eternal Sunshine
Since I'm in my 60's and not the target demographic, I'll ask this -

 

- is it harder for a "friend" to accept not being added in the first place or being ultimately de-friended?

 

It would seem the latter would be more problematic...

 

Mr. Lucky

 

 

Yes, exactly. Befriending someone and unfriending them led to a huge amount of drama in the past.

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Eternal Sunshine

I will always remember my first real job. After a few years of hard work and great performance reviews, my co-worker got promoted and I didn't. When I asked my manager why, he said something along the lines of "ES nobody here takes you seriously. You are always laughing and having fun. We just can't picture you in an authoritative role." In that job, I was best friends with everyone, tagging them in social media posts etc. I learned from that mistake. People actually only see what you present to them.

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Michelle ma Belle

And this is why I don't use my real name on any of my social media accounts. If I want you, I'll be the one to find you. Not the other way around :)

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In general I have tended to be relatively aloof with co-workers, however there would have been a few exceptions, a few co-workers along the way that would have gelled better with than most ,

 

this type of question - there can never be an absolute answer- some people love their work environments and are all one big happy family,

 

Id imagine the majority like to forget about their co-workers once the work day is over,

 

the real question here is if you have left an organisation for a year - how many co-workers would still keep in contact,

 

very few I would say in general- these might qualify as friends or "facebook friends" for people who are into that.

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It's best to not add any co-workers on social media in any capacity in the long run. They're co-workers, and they may not be the peeps you would want knowing every detail of your personal life that some post on FB.

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I travel internationally every single year. I usually take off 6 to 10 work days to do that. My co-workers don’t need to know that I travel like that otherwise, I’ll be denied raises and be the first one fired.

 

Also, three years ago, I was friends with a co-worker who ended up being my boss for 7 short weeks. I made a comment about my in laws many months before and she used that comment as another reason to fire me by stating that I could not get along with others outside of work too. She was also jealous because she had always wanted to travel to Europe but could not because she was raising her grandkids. I only friend people now after I leave the company.

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Since I'm in my 60's and not the target demographic, I'll ask this -

 

- is it harder for a "friend" to accept not being added in the first place or being ultimately de-friended?

 

It would seem the latter would be more problematic...

 

Mr. Lucky

 

 

Sorry, I didn't see your question before. Well, if I sent a request to a "real" friend, I'd be offended if they didn't add me and I'd be even more offended if they de-friended me :lmao: But we're talking about work acquaintances here.

 

 

If I don't add them in the first place, they'll probably just assume that I'm not very active on Facebook (and that is correct). If I accept the request and then find out that they're constantly posting annoying things, I can just mute them and they'll never know. I have A LOT of people on my "muted" list. If for some reason I actually want to de-friend or even block them, it's usually because I have a solid reason for that and then I don't really care about offending them. The guy I mentioned in my post (co-worker that I de-friended on Facebook) tried to kiss me after a company party and sent some very inappropriate messages afterwards (he's married and his wife just had baby at that time). So he knew exactly why I de-friended him on social media and I honestly didn't care about his feelings at that point ;)

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