Am I overreacting to distrust him?

[Ditapage]

Hi guys, thanks for reading.

 

I work for a timeshare company in a department of about 8. My desk was beside a colleague who over a period of a few months was making derogatory comments about my performance, my health, my love life (“youre single and not having sex that’s why you look tired and unwell all the time” gee thanks) make loud suggestions that I should sleep with another colleague, I had health issues and she would comment every day that I look terrible, should quit the job and she made it all feel ten times harder than dealing with angry, ripped off timeshare members for 8 hours a day already is.

 

I let it all slide until one day she put her hands on me so I went to my boss so I could be moved away from her, but as well as being moved, my boss also took it to HR and she was called in for a disciplinary meeting.

 

Another one of my colleagues who i considered a friend as he is very conversational with me and kind, helpful and encouraging, agreed to accompany her to this meeting as a support person and I feel like I can’t trust him anymore as he basically took sides. His behaviour toward me hasn’t changed but now I feel like he’s not genuine and I am thinking of giving him the cold shoulder from now on.

 

Am I just overreacting? I feel like if he was genuinely a good person he would have been impartial instead.

 

I don’t know whether to burn the relationship altogether and say nothing to him anymore, or to ask him why he chose to get involved.

 

I feel hurt and want to do the first one and be done with it, but i have a tendency to overreact this way so it’d be much appreciated for someone to help me put things into perspective.

 

Thank you

[d0nnivain]

You are over reacting a little bit. You know now that somebody who is friendly at work is not necessarily your friend. Try assuming that he did it to keep peace in his corner of the office because he didn't want to be perceived by your tormentor as being on your side. What he did was motivated by a desire to keep his work place calm not a desire to hurt you.

 

Keep things professional with everybody including the bad co-worker. Tell nobody anything personal & do your job.

[Mr. Lucky]

I feel like if he was genuinely a good person he would have been impartial instead.

 

Maybe this was him being impartial. You have to accept people can see another side of things and you have your reasons, they have theirs.

 

Agree with d0nnivain, to continue discussing this with anyone just gives it more life. If you're going to keep the job, keep to yourself, do the work and go home...

 

Mr. Lucky

[Caauug]

Work:

Rule #1 Trust no one

Rule #2 See Rule #1

Rule #3 .....

[quote=d0nnivain;7775153

Tell nobody anything personal & do your job.

 

 

 

You are being paid to do a job, just do it. Personal life can change but you still need a job to pay bills. Keep them separate. Less your co-workers/boss knows the better. They do not need to know.