Second thoughts about leaving a practice to start my own

[laelithia]

Hi Everyone,

 

I'm a little worried that I might have made a mistake by opening up my own private practice in October/November. I was originally a private contractor in a private practice walking distance from my home, but I started to feel like I could do the work on my own without sacrificing 35% of my pay to work under another practice.

 

Now that I have opened up my own practice and have been there for a few months, I'm starting to have second thoughts about leaving the security and comfort of the old practice, as well as my colleagues who I adored. I'm probably making about the same I did like the old practice, but I think I will be making more money soon as I get more established. That being said, I visited the owner of my old practice today to give her some chocolate I got for her while I was in Switzerland over the holidays, and it really hit home how much I miss her office space (it's much, much larger and cosier than mine), and having colleagues like her.

 

Additionally, I miss being able to walk over to work in a matter of minutes. I miss not having to deal with administrative duties, paying rent, social media accounts, and other business related stressors. I had decided to leave originally as when I was due to sign my contract with the previous practice, my lawyer suggested financially it would make more sense for me to branch out on my own, as for the most part, my 35% cut was going towards the use of the office space and nothing more, which I could find at a fraction of that cost, which was true. Also, I had to share the office space with my colleagues, which meant there were certain days or hours I couldn't work even though I wanted to.

 

That being said, I don't think I factored in how much I would miss the space and the proximity to my home, my colleagues, and the piece of mind of someone else taking care of the business side of things. I feel like I didn't talk to the practice owner enough about what I would need to stay, such as more hours, a smaller percentage cut (although I did ask about this and she declined), and her taking on more administrative tasks for me.

 

I guess what I'm wondering- is this regret normal? Will it go away, or is it a sign I made a rash decision? I was pretty insecure about opening up my own practice, to begin with, but all my friends and family (and lawyer) insisted it was by far the better thing to do professionally and financially. I suppose now I just worry I let these opinions decide for me, rather giving myself more time to think it through. I feel really lonely at my current office space, as the other psychologists who are in the same vicinity are often not working when I am. To make matters worse, I am also struggling with a LDR right now and whether or not I will move to a new continent to make that work. Perhaps this is affecting how I'm feeling about my business too, I'm not sureI just feel so lost and confused, and worried that I'm going to continue to regret leaving a comfortable position to start out on my own. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Edited January 17, 2019 by laelithia

[MetallicHue]

I have regrets leaving my prior job. I was greatly overworked but the flexibility and people I worked with I greatly miss. My new job no one has really been too friendly, feel like I can only scratch the surface and my boss is quite challenging to work with. My regrets from leaving the prior job have faded overtime but I’m not exactly liking my new situation. I encourage you to not just look back but to also look forward. If you’re not happy change your situation. But I’d still wait a little bit longer before doing anything rash. The one thing I did learn is work can in some ways be more about the people you meet than the actual work itself. Maybe it’s something I should have realized before leaving. But I can’t go back - just have to keep moving forward.

[Rockdad]

I would say what your feeling is not uncommon. When a person spends their career working for someone else or in your case sub contracting there are unrealized details, benefits and responsibilities that are taken care of. That is part of the reason for the high percentage start up failures. You may very well have an advantage having contractor experience over an hourly or salary straight employee going into this. There is a world of difference between working by the hour with benefits switching to being self employed business owner. People that do that are so shocked to find out just how much the tax man, accounting and newly discovered overhead takes off the top. I have had more than one good employee leave to start their own business to come back a couple years later.

 

 

This is a new side and a change for you. It must have been something you have been thinking about doing, if you didn't try you would have never known. Give it sometime for the pieces to start fitting into place and you getting more comfortable as you work your business.

[Wallysbears]

Some people love having their own business, others do not.

 

My husband LOVES IT. He is GOOD at it.

 

Me? Tried it and hated it.

 

Neither is right or wrong.

[laelithia]

Thank you, everyone, for your replies. I am hoping this feeling goes away, that I am able to focus more on the positives of opening my own practice rather than the negatives of leaving the old one, but I must admit certain days are much harder than others.

 

For instance, today is a particularly cold snowy day. I would love to be working in her large, warm, cozy office rather in the office I have now. That being said, I looked into the financial side of things, and with calculating it out, I will make roughly $40,000 - $50,000 more with my own practice (I forgot to factor in that I've only been working 2 weeks for November and 3 weeks in December). Perhaps if I did manage to go back to the old practice, I would then be upset that I could be making much more money on my own. Maybe my mind is simply so used to regretting something, and it's more about that than it is about truly wishing I had stayed. What do you think?

[JuneL]

Perhaps once your revenues are more stable, you can hire someone part-time to do the boring or tedious administrative work?

[ChatroomHero]

That feeling is the fuel you should be harnessing to make your new practice successful.

 

 

For a little sacrifice and risk, you can grow enough to where maybe you can afford hire an office admin. Someone you choose, someone that would be a colleague to interact with. In a short time you could be in the position to be choosing an office closer to your home, on a beach, it the coolest build ever...

 

 

Basically you had a vision and it motivated you enough to start out on your own...maybe a cozier office than you worked in, employees that are like family to you, your pick of office locations, making more money and taking nice vacations...whatever.

 

 

When you had your vision there was no real way to know the full effort and in your vision, it's not like you are going to factor in the kind of crappy times. You need to keep looking at your vision but deal with the day to day as it comes up. Use that "fear of regret" to push you along and before long, you might be sitting on the beach, drinking a beer and completely content with where everything is.

 

 

It is just as easy to put on the rose colored glasses and look to your future vision as it is to look at your past with those same glasses. If you are going to succeed you need to stop looking back and focus that effort on looking forward. Every minute you spend thinking about your old office and co-workers, etc. is a minute you lost working toward your goal.

[Eternal Sunshine]

I have always had some feelings of sadness and regret in leaving any job. Even if the job was bad. It goes away after about 6 months. It probably takes 2 years to truly evaluate if you have made a mistake though.

[Rockdad]

I vividly recall the 1st day when I was on my way to my own shop. I left a full time job with benefits to do this start up business. I thought what the hell did I just do?!! Yes there were doubts galore, loooong hours ect but the 1st few years in flew by and I knew I could never work for anyone ever again.

 

 

 

As you get established you can work up to an office setting that you want. You have to pay your dues and earn it though.

[laelithia]

Hi Everyone,

 

I wish I was feeling better about this, but despite even making more money the last 6 months, I still am regretting leaving the old practice. I’ve come up with some reasons why:

 

1. I feel very badly about how I dealt with my unhappiness with the clinic owner. Specifically, exaggerating her flaws to my friends and family and complaining all the time rather than talking with her myself. I basically ran away from these talks, and left to start my own business instead.

 

2. In the end, I knew in my gut that I didn’t want to handle all the business side of things, but I felt like I would lose all respect from everyone (my parents, my lawyer and accountant, the person I reached out to rent the new office space from, my friends, etc.) basically everyone I told about the situation if I didn’t go forward and do it. That I liked my creature comforts, not having a commute at all, having a team of colleagues especially. I feel like once I had talked to everyone, I opened Pandora’s box and I could go back. It seems so silly now to think about it like that.

 

3. I feel very badly how I treated the clinic owner, as she took a chance on me 2 years ago to hire me right on the spot, in the end. The truth was, she asked many times what my issues or concerns were with the contract I was to sign in September, but I kept holding her back saying I was still waiting to hear from my lawyer. Once I did talk to her, the only thing I mentioned was the percentage of my pay, nothing else. None of my other issues. After talking with some of my colleagues, I found out that 65% is actually quite high. Most of my colleagues are at 55% to be an independent contractor. On a personal level, I feel like I betrayed The clinic owner who had become my friend. She had been very open to me in our relationship, but I let my feelings about the issues I had at her clinic affect that. I did not give her the same courtesy of openness. So it was not just because I eventually left, but how it happened and how I never gave her the opportunity to rectify the other issues that makes me feel so guilty now. We used to consult on cases, support one another, and now I haven’t hear from her at all since January.

 

Most of all, I’m realizing that this line of work is already so draining and exhausting mentally, the last thing I want to do at the end of the day is do more business sides of things, especially on my own. I feel like everything is now on my shoulders, and if I’m not feeling well (emotionally or physically), I don’t have any help to lean on. I think I preferred just doing my job, working with people. I don’t like the growing of my business things, and I don’t think I would ever have the confidence to branch out and hire other people, I wouldn’t want the responsibility or the headache. Knowing this, I think being a independent contractor was the best of both worlds, meaning technically I still work for myself, but everything else is taken care of for me.

 

I don’t know what to do now. I don’t know how to not lose face and confidence with my clients (especially the ones that congratulated me on opening up my own practice) and everyone else. I don’t know how to move forward in getting another office space, and continuing to build my business when it feels like pulling teeth. I hate it, and my gut is screaming at me inside that it isn’t the right choice for me. I don’t even know if the clinic owner would take me back, and even if she did, it would be so humiliating, both with her and my previous colleagues. That and now I’m terrified if I do find a way to go back, I might regret closing my business. All around I feel like there is just shame and embarrassment waiting for me, or misery in doing something I don’t want to do, I feel so stuck.

 

Also, I am still very confused on if I want to stay in this city. It is my hometown, all that I have ever known. It is a high rated city in terms of places to live in the world, but I have always wanted to live elsewhere, even for a short time. I feel like I’m running out of time to do that. That being said, if I end up deciding to stay in the city, I would prefer private contracting over having my own business. I just don’t know if it’s worth reopening all of this up with my previous clinic, or if I should tough it out.

Edited March 16, 2019 by laelithia

[BC1980]

I would give it at least a year before evaluating if this was the wrong decision. It's normal to have regrets. If the regrets linger past one year, that's an indication that maybe this was the wrong decision. You have to make the decision to know if it was the wrong one. There's nothing wrong with trying something new.

[d0nnivain]

Not everybody is cut out to be an entrepreneur. But since you hate the business side of things but are making more money, delegate. Hire somebody to do the stuff you don't like.

[georgia girl]

I agree that you should wait at least a year. Recall that everyone who has followed you to your new clinic and everyone who has supported you so far deserves to see you give this a fair shake. Even more, however, you owe it to yourself.

 

Moreover, please do not go moving and making another, even more drastic lifestyle change at this time. It seems to me that when you get uncomfortable or unhappy, you engage in a life-altering form of escapism. That may be an awef expensive and unsettling way to live life.

 

Why not instead try and rebuild your friendship with the clinic owner? Apologize for how you acted, admit to avoiding conflict and note that you would like to at least be friend, if not collaborators? Work to rebuild your old connections. And, in a year or two, if you are still unhappy, perhaps you go back?

 

Finally, you need to get over the “humiliation” of going back or admitting you were wrong. We are all wrong - more times than we want to admit. But we all respect the people who can admit when they’re wrong. Few of us respect those who can’t admit it.

[lolita888]

Is it not possible to keep on working and without closing your own business? Or least find a different place so that you won't have that rivalry with your previous partner.

 

 

Having your own business is not that easy. You will have to pay the rent, the bills and all of the expenses that come with it. Another thing is that, new businesses doesn't always guarantee a good income. There will be months where you will feel like you are spending more than what you are earning. Moments were you will make mistake and lose money. So while your business is new and you are still getting the hang of it, then it's also better to have something that will be able to support you and your business. You will learn things as time goes by.

 

 

 

When my mother was just starting in her business. I also felt that it was a mistake. That instead of getting more it's feel like we are spend more and more money to it. But now that it's getting well known, I am starting to see the good sides of having your own business.