JoGarr Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 Hi all I'm new here and just navigating around, reading all the good advice that's been given to everyone:cool: I have a question about references, if anyone could please spare me 5. Basically, I've taken all the bullying and covert, underhand behaviour I can from my current boss and MUST get out for the sake of my sanity. I've been applying for some posts recently and the problem is, most application forms state that you MUST put down a current employer as a referee. My boss is the only appropriate person I could put down as a referee, as noone else would do it, because a. my boss had told them she must provide all references and b. wouldnt really be qualified to do it. She has openly told me in the past about giving a past employee a bad reference and I got the feeling this was a direct threat to me:mad:. Any suggestions as to what I could do? I am at my wits end and dont want to be beholden to my boss for ANYTHING, never mind something that could potentially jepoardise my future career:confused: Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 Is there an HR department that you could direct a reference request to? Or a second person within the company you could use as a second reference to counteract one done by your boss? Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 In the UK employers cant really give bad references. It is generally seen as a poor reflection on themselves! If I were you I would do a bit of voluntary work so that you have a contrasting reference just in case where you live it is a different set up. Just be honest if a new employer asks any questions. Dont think that you are alone on this one. There have been plenty of people in the same situation as yourself honey. I know it is a bad time at the moment with the whole global economic mess but I would still go job hunting. There are some fabulous temp contracts out there at the moment. Why is it that female bosses are worse than male ones? I hate to generalise but it is true... Take care, Eve xx Link to post Share on other sites
Author JoGarr Posted April 25, 2009 Author Share Posted April 25, 2009 Thanks a million for your replies Anne and Eve, they were a great help and really do give me a glimmer of hope!! Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 Why is it that female bosses are worse than male ones? I hate to generalise but it is true... I am afraid that in my experience, I have to agree with you. Never had a problem with a male boss, but the females ones were a nightmare. My boss from a few years ago was a bully (deeply insecure woman and threatened by the fact that people liked and respected me but not her). When I got my current job, she made this big point of telling me how she had done a wonderful reference for me. WTF. I have since seen it and it is about 2 lines long and says something along the lines of having read the job description, she thought I could do the job. Whereas my male boss from another previous employer did a fabulous 3 page reference. Like Eve, I am in the UK so the legislation around references is pretty tight. Doing a bad reference for no good reason will only end up with the old employer getting into trouble. The OP's boss may also be just full of hot air and not follow though with her threat of a bad reference. Link to post Share on other sites
TwinkletOes26 Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 its against the law in the us for a boss to give a bad reference too. Also in my opinion giving a bad reference would be a bad reflection on the company and make you wonder what the motivation behind the bad reference. Kinda like teachers writing comments in your permanent record for your next years teacher to see. Teachers/bosses are people too and a LOT of people are just plain petty ok rant over Link to post Share on other sites
BUENG1 Posted April 25, 2009 Share Posted April 25, 2009 Hi all I'm new here and just navigating around, reading all the good advice that's been given to everyone:cool: I have a question about references, if anyone could please spare me 5. Basically, I've taken all the bullying and covert, underhand behaviour I can from my current boss and MUST get out for the sake of my sanity. I've been applying for some posts recently and the problem is, most application forms state that you MUST put down a current employer as a referee. My boss is the only appropriate person I could put down as a referee, as noone else would do it, because a. my boss had told them she must provide all references and b. wouldnt really be qualified to do it. She has openly told me in the past about giving a past employee a bad reference and I got the feeling this was a direct threat to me:mad:. Any suggestions as to what I could do? I am at my wits end and dont want to be beholden to my boss for ANYTHING, never mind something that could potentially jepoardise my future career:confused: Is this an internal job posting? If not I'm not your boss can dictate who gives a reference for you(if they use a cell phone, not using company property etc). Link to post Share on other sites
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