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do things happen for a reason?


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I was just wondering what people thought about fate and if anyone believes certain events happen for a reason?

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i strongly believe that eveyrthing that happens, there's an unspoken reason, just that at that time we may not know why, but eventually when u recap back, u realise that that event happened is to teach/tell us a lesson/somthing. i would like ot believe that if any negative things happens to me, like break ups, failed relationships/friendships, its always for good course.

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I totally agree with monomacy. If you think of something in your life, and go backward and see how things fell into place and if for some reason if one of those things changed, the end result wouldn't be the same.

 

If I never worked at a certain job, I never would have joined the team bowl league, never would have met a friend who got me into CB Radios, is how I met another friend who taught me how to drive transport and helped me with my license, to get my first trucking job, where I met me fiancee. Fate? I like to think so.

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hurtingandconfused

I love your story carla.

 

Things happen for a reason?? I don't know, but I'd like to believe so. I'd like to believe that all this pain that I've been through will help me live a better life.

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I have to admit, it does amaze me when I think how my girlfriend came thousands of miles to the US and ended up here in this town near me. And she was single and so was I at the time friends introduced us. And I had never met her friend and she had never met mine. And because it was a setup, I almost didn't call her. And when she left me a message I thought she sounded big and fat. But when I met her, what a babe!! We aren't even friends with the people who introduced us anymore. The odds against us ever meeting are so huge.

 

But then I think the odds against any two people meeting are huge. I mean you're going to meet people wherever you go. No biggie. They must have come from somewhere.

 

But if Fate worked so hard to get us together, then I damn sure hope we can figure our problems out. We could set records for great relationships. Now I'm just working out the odds of us picking our particular couples counselor. Why THAT one?? Must be Fate again!

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Ahhhhh....but johan....WHAT if she is the stepping stone or link to the woman of your dreams?

 

I'm not saying it is....but it's always a possibility. The relationships I had which didn't turn out....all led me on down a path.....where I became a better person and more likely to succeed at anything I envisioned.

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Nice thought, but...

 

You don't watch football do you? Don't you know if you keep thinking about next week's opponent, you'll lose the game you're playing? I know I've complained about her a lot on here, but I tell you: she really is the woman of my dreams. Good ones and bad ones. I won't give up, until all hope is lost. I'm stuck on her.

 

Thanks though, Arabess. If she breaks up with me, the first thing I'll do is come back and read your post.

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Don't you know if you keep thinking about next week's opponent, you'll lose the game you're playing?

 

Speaking of fate, I actually needed to hear this at this particular moment. :) So thanks!

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I'm not suggesting you give up. I agree.....if all else FAILS.....THEN you to to Plan B. HAHA!

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Yes, I believe things happen for a reason, to teach us a lesson. Sometimes you really can't see what it may be at the time, but usually looking back you can find the lesson you learnt at the time.

 

I met my partner in meditation class, as I've said before. He'd never been to such a class, but felt drawn to enter the shop, and sign up for a class. He'd just moved to the area, and so had I...and then, we ended up in the same meditation class, full of women, except for him...and well, things blossomed from there. We just clicked and felt we were meant to meet, and that I was the reason he suddenly decided to do something entirely different. We like to believe in that anyway.

 

Pav...it's possible your girlfriend's events happened for a reason too, and that you are even learning lessons in how to cope with things right now, as am I.

 

About 18 months ago, my guy and I talked of marriage. Then things happened and we put the whole thing on the backburner. At the time I felt angry and sad that life was throwing so many hurdles our way. But now looking back, I can see that they were lessons we needed to learn, which have drawn us even closer, and made our love more real. We weren't ready for marriage back then, even though we thought we were and felt very in love. So those things happened because they really did need to happen for us to sort a few things out.

 

Of course, we also have a role in helping determine the direction our life head...we always have some choices, even within the big 'fate' picture.

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ThisGirlNameKD

Arabess:

 

I like your take on the relationship thing. There was this guy I was seeing for 3 year and I just knew without a doubt that he was the one that I was going to be with for the rest of my life. He had alot of good qualities and I learn so much from him. But he wasn't the one I would settle down with. What I learn from the experience is that he was never meant to be the one I would settle down with. He was the one that was suppose to teach me alot of wonderful things about life, and learning those things led me to the one I eventually settled down with. I think everything you go through in life are potential teachers. Especially the painful things. But if you don't stop to learn the lessons, you'll find yourself going around in circles.

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ThisGirlNameKD, I so know what you're talking about-my ex relationship was a 4years long one and I was so convinced he's the Man in my life!!! Thanks for speaking out loud, I've almost forgotten this!

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I believe in fate. If it weren't for the strange coincidences which I like to call fate that led me to find the man who's pulling me through the hardest time of my life. If it weren't for him... I would can't imagine how much pain I would be in right now.

 

Even though it will probably end one day (although I do have my fingers crossed for a fairy tale ending since he is my first true love) I do believe that I was meant to fall in love with him. If only for this moment in time, he's the one. If he's not the man I'll marry, he will always be one of my best friends and sometimes that's a lot more valuable/important than finding a husband. A part of me will always love him for teaching me how to walk again (figuratively speaking).

 

Even if he does break my heart, that doesn't mean that fate isn't a reality. Just think about what you had together and the effects it had on your life. Especially when it comes to loving another person, its important to remember what you had together... not how it ends.

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Isn't there a point where you've thought 'maybe we could have an end to the lessons'?

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moi - what do you mean? if he could just stop with the lessons and let people be happy?

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if he could just stop with the lessons and let people be happy

 

Well, I don't know about 'people'. I was meaning me. Do you ever think to yourself that you would be glad to see an end to your 'lessons' - at least for a while?

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yeah i know exactly what u mean... sometimes im just like "seriously, couldnt you have cut me just a little slack"... idk though. Either this is all random or theres a greater meaning, sucks we wont know until its too late...

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Either this is all random or theres a greater meaning, sucks we wont know until its too late...

 

Well, sometimes you do see as you look back how life seems to have carried you to a better place than you might have been if it had gone the way you planned. You don't always have to wait until the very end to see it.

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I totally feel that things happen for a reason, even bad things, although it certainly doesn't feel that way at the time. I believe in the phrase "That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger." I think that all the bad things that happened to me earlier in life, which I was able to overcome, made me a much stronger person and able to deal with even worse things that came later. I think if someone has a "normal," easy, near-perfect life and then something tragic happens to them, they are far less emotionally prepared to deal with it. It's just my personal theory anyway.

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  • 2 weeks later...

moi...everything should be a learning experience, good or bad. it's what makes life interesting!

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Originally posted by pav186

I was just wondering what people thought about fate and if anyone believes certain events happen for a reason?

 

I do not believe in fate. I believe that rules do not exist until we make them, and that everything is based on random chaos. I do not think that anything is supposed to make sense or to be understood. I believe we have made false rules and truths to feel more at place and gain some security through created order. I do not believe that order exists. Fate would, to me, fall under order and this would mean that everything is an intricately designed plan, making perfect sense. Fate actually goes against my religious beliefs.

 

–><–

 

 

Originally posted by carla

I totally agree with monomacy. If you think of something in your life, and go backward and see how things fell into place and if for some reason if one of those things changed, the end result wouldn't be the same.

 

If I never worked at a certain job, I never would have joined the team bowl league, never would have met a friend who got me into CB Radios, is how I met another friend who taught me how to drive transport and helped me with my license, to get my first trucking job, where I met me fiancee. Fate? I like to think so.

 

Those things are what I would call completely random and chaotic events. One random event lead to another random event, which in turn lead to another. Random chaos is how things work. Such things only make sense when we want to make sense of them. They actually do not, nor are intended to, make any type of sense to us.

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