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Obsessed over someone for years...

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Old 15th October 2017, 8:00 PM   #1
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Obsessed over someone for years...

Obsessed over someone for years?
Well this is rather embarrassing, but here it goes....I have been obsessed with an individual for years. I haven't seen this person in over seven years, and better yet... we've never have even spoken to one another! Each time that we would see each other, in passing, it was physically obvious that we were attracted to one another, but nothing was ever said. At one point I added him on social media, but he never reached out. I'm an educated person, and it is time to move on... but I can't stop replaying this silly fanasty of being with him. If he wanted to learn more about me he would have connected long ago. I have been on dates, and no one ever seems to match up to this guy! It's stupid, I know!!! While I realize this situation has been replayed over and over in my head and I've become attached to this fanasty, and I know it's going to take time to get it out of my head, I'm asking if anyone has been in this position and what they have done to try to decrease these thoughts....
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Old 15th October 2017, 8:16 PM   #2
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I was obsessed for a guy for seven years. Then I found out he got a bf,. But that's a different story, You know how they say the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else? Well, The best way to stop obsessing over someone, for me, has always been to start obsessing over someone else. I wonder if the cycle will ever end. I wish I had something more helpful to say but that's usually how it goes. One thing that may help to you is to go in see. I am sure you look at pictures of him? I also think that you fantasize or imagine you two together? That is going to make it worse I think. Stopping those things and getting a new crush made me forget about him. It took a long time but it was sudden. Now when I look back, I have NO idea where I saw appeal
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Old 16th October 2017, 4:47 AM   #3
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Mine was in college she would come up to me when I was running working out in track and field. That was a different time for me. She was really into me we talked on the phone after college. I made a terrible mistake and I wish I could get a message to myself in the past to change everything today. I would have married her and have kids today. Something I don't have today. How sad is that to share, but I strong will mind today I walk with confidence in any place I go as I am no fool and I don't care what others say. I worked hard make good living and I am who I am from within and without. I have everything in life has to offer. Sure would be nice to find someone to share this life with. I know it will happen one day. But right now I like helping others if I can. I can't obsessed myself with the past but to move on.
Age doesn't matter, but Love does matter! Which love it's the magical one "I love you" also I am in love with you" More powerful than anyone age! If you really love that person you are so interested in you would move heavens and mountains to reach them!'
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Old 16th October 2017, 7:17 AM   #4
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You could try good self talk -- repeatedly reminding yourself that this is a fantasy that will never turn into reality. After 7 years of being obsessed I don't think that will work.

You need a cold hard dose of reality that is more painful then the social media rejection. Make a concerted effort to be where this person will be. Talk to them. Work up the courage to ask them out. Hopefully when they say no, you will finally get it out of your system. Or I suppose there is a miniscule chance they will say yes & all your dreams will come true. Either way you will be unstuck, because this unrequited pining which is approaching a decade is unhealthy.
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Old 16th October 2017, 7:25 AM   #5
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do you know if he is married and has kids?

If he does, please leave him alone.

If not, you could call and ask him on a date. Hope the reality is close to the fantasy.

just hope he is not a killer.

Be safe.
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