Community Forums

Reload this Page Community Forums > Mind, Body & Soul > Abuse

Husband almost hit me

Abuse Support for and discussion of psychological, physical, and sexual abuse.

Like Tree16Likes
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 8th October 2017, 3:07 PM   #16
Established Member
elaine567's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 14,174
I think you need to start looking seriously at your relationship.
You are in a "long courtship and short marriage" type of a relationship.
It seems to me that many such relationship tend to hit a barrier at this point.

I think some men start feeling "trapped" at 7+ years.. and despite the new marriage it is often prime time for cheating too.
For the woman she is so very happy, she just got married and kids are on the horizon.
BUT long courtships are often due to the man not being ready for commitment and when it comes down to the wire, he feels somewhat bulldozed into a wedding.
It is make or break time, he is torn, he doesn't want to give up the relationship BUT he is often not really as keen as he once was, and he doesn't really want to get married either. He does usually however end up going with the flow.

I guess here this guy with a bit of drink in, let down his guard and all that carefully hidden anger and resentment came out.
Not only was he not free to really whoop it up with the boys, he has a wife determined to spoil his "fun". He lashed out...

I do not think it is the OPs fault, who wants to be around a drunk guy anyway? She was right to stop the boozing.
BUT this flash of temper and violence showed all is not right with her marriage and she needs to take note.

Whether this is a one off or whether this is just the start of a catalogue of abuse, who can say?
It could be either.

If this is completely out of character for him, ie he is not usually an aggressive drunk or he is usually a over friendly drunk, then "the why" needs investigated.
If there is no obvious cause, like depression, stress at work, family troubles, money worries etc. then I am afraid it may indeed be another woman.
Men who are cheating can turn into ogres at home.
elaine567 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 28th October 2017, 8:01 PM   #17
Established Member
TunaCat's Avatar
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 853
People are going to have different opinions on this. For me, this is a hard line that you (speaking generally here) don't cross. I don't care that he didn't actually hit you. The intent was there, the rage was there. That would be enough for me to pack my bags and get the hell out of there.

I don't tolerate abuse or aggressiveness. I just don't. Even if it's just once. I wouldn't take a chance of it happening again.
TunaCat is offline   Reply With Quote


Thread Tools
Display Modes


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Birthday present for husband/wife/SO, what you get? Need ideas for husband B-day gift thestairs Marriage & Life Partnerships 33 28th May 2015 8:33 PM
confused whether to continue my relationship with non understanding husband. husband lover bumble98 General Relationship Discussion 2 16th November 2014 3:32 AM
People talking about my ex-husband in front of my husband! Mauschen Marriage & Life Partnerships 4 10th March 2011 1:04 PM
Issue with ex husband getting better, now issues with current husband... Confused0872 Coping 2 12th July 2007 11:21 AM
I suspect my husband, should I tell her husband so he can be aware? smarkum Infidelity 17 15th July 2006 7:48 PM

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 1:28 PM.

Please note: The suggestions and advice offered on this web site are opinions only and are not to be used in the place of professional psychological counseling or medical advice. If you or someone close to you is currently in crisis or in an emergency situation, contact your local law enforcement agency or emergency number.

Copyright © 1997-2018 All Rights Reserved.