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How did you recover?

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Old 8th March 2019, 10:06 PM   #16
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 3,456

I tried everything and came back and posted again and again looking for answers. I'm still heartbroken 5 years later. But the fact it's been 5 years means that I'm still moving along and definitely feel better now than I did then.

Some people say:
-go and sleep with someone else
-forgive them
-take up running
-change your thinking
-hang with friends
-analyse the relationship and breakup
-'work on you'
-get a pet
-get a new hobby

These things can help soothe the pain but they don't fix the heartbreak. I don't believe anything fixes it aside from time and just getting to a stage where it's a distant memory. Similarly with grief and loss, some things you don't get over. But it's ok, you will be ok.
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Old 8th March 2019, 10:14 PM   #17
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Location: Santa Monica California
Posts: 29,510
When my first marriage collapsed at the time I seriously thought that I had nothing to lose so I stopped giving an F. I did what I wanted, said what I wanted and stopped being afraid and it gave me a new lease on life. I found that when I stopped trying to please anybody then things fell into place. I made a lot of money, made a lot of friends, went a lot of places and met a great woman that I am still happily married to. Honestly her cheating on me in retrospect was one of the best things that happened to me.
You know people have completely lost it when you can no longer tell the difference between real headlines and Onion headlines.
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Old 12th March 2019, 2:26 PM   #18
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Posts: 6
Originally Posted by TooNis View Post
Anyone have to deal with ex who is bipolar and the breakup? Not normal breakup

I was with someone I suspect was either bi-polar or BPD. She would not admit a problem so it's undiagnosed but she ticked all the boxes. I left her four times over her behavior. Each time, after a month or so of NC, she would call, text or send me something saying she was sorry. Stupidly, I took her back each time until the last episode. It took such an extreme turn that my heart finally realized what my brain knew all along. You cannot deal with these people. They will drag you down with them. I dodged a bullet.
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