Lovehurts10 Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 Hello everyone, I'm 19 years old and I have been talking to a girl online for 5 months and 15 days.. I cannot get this girl to meet me. We love each other very much. I've been there for her though a lot of hard times, I've sent her roses multiple times and we always talk about cuddling in bed. This girl has anxitey and axnitey attacks. Shes afraid I will see her brake down in tears, roll up in a ball and hear her breath out of control. I've asured her I dont mind seeing that and will be there and cuddle her and hold her hand until everything is ok. This relationship is taking a toll out of my life. Everything I do I cant have fun anymore I just think about her. I'm in bed at night pretending to cuddle her and I've cried alot because I can't see her. I will not leave her I love her alot. I dont know what to do. I know where she works but I wont go in there as I know she wouldnt like me just rocking up there. I'm really worried I'm never gonna see her. She says it's hard for her too and she really wants to see me and has wrote many times come around and see me but has deleted the message cos she can't do it. What do I do? How can I help this situation? Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 I have been talking to a girl online for 5 months and 15 days.. I cannot get this girl to meet me. If she is afraid to meet people then she is not ready for a relationship at all. You can't fix her, that will probably need a trained therapist, and a LOT of time. You have to accept that this relationship is going to be online-only. If you're not happy with that, then you need to end it, and find someone who is less broken. Don't date fixer-uppers. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 This relationship is taking a toll out of my life. Everything I do I cant have fun anymore I just think about her. This is not a healthy relationship for you. You are much too invested in a relationship that is nothing more than an online friendship. It’s not healthy to invest this much into any relationship, particularly an online friendship with a woman that you have never met. If this is your first relationship, you need to know that this is not how relationships happen. Healthy relationships don’t make you feel like this. A healthy relationship doesn’t “take a toll on your life.” This woman has significant issues and she needs professional help. I would suggest, you would also benefit from some counselling to help you to understand how to set some boundaries and develop healthy relationship. Good luck. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 You need to understand a few things. 1. This isn't real. When you only know the person virtually, it's a fantasy. Until you meet in person, you have nothing. You certainly don't love each other. You don't even know each other. You devalue the concept by throwing it around cavalierly. Stop. 2. Broken birds cannot be healed by their 19 year old BFs. The need YEARS of professional medical care. This chick is so messed up she can't meet you. There is no hope. 3. Life is not a rom-com. In 5 months you have sent this girl roses "multiple times". Kid, save your money. I love roses & the kind of man who sends them but you don't go spending that kind of cash on someone you never met. 4. Talking about cuddling in bed with somebody you never met is borderline creepy. You have already wasted 5 months & 15 days on this girl. She's hopeless. When they won't meet you after 1-2 weeks of talking give up. Seriously, don't waste another 5 minutes on her. Because you are such a romantic guy with your head in the clouds, send her an ultimatum: Meet me tomorrow for coffee or this has to be over because I'm tired of you being too insecure to even meet me. By now you have to know I'm a good guy but you since you apparently don't trust me, I'm done. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted February 4, 2019 Share Posted February 4, 2019 This woman has significant issues and she needs professional help. I would suggest, you would also benefit from some counselling to help you to understand how to set some boundaries and develop healthy relationship. Assuming that's even who she is. Lovehurts10, there's lots of people online who get enjoyment from messing with gullible people like you, or who even worse will try to take advantage of you emotionally or financially. Nothing wrong with social media, but use it to communicate with girls you know IRL... Mr. Lucky 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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