removing toxic acquaintances

[primer]

In the past few years I established better boundaries. That required distancing myself or even eliminating some friendships and relationships. One was my ex-fiancé; he was emotionally abusive. There are some friends I no longer socialize with because they have no integrity and are narrow minded. I do not contact a childhood friend because the only time I hear from her is when she is broken-hearted; when she has a man I do not hear one word from her.

 

 

It seems like now that I "cleaned house" my true friends are few and far between. I am okay with that. I am content being alone and doing things alone.

 

 

Did you ever remove toxic people from your life? For what reasons have you distanced yourself from acquaintances?

[bathtub-row]

I’ve also done this quite a bit over the years. Most recently, a childhood friend whose life is a shambles because of a drug habit. I discovered that she was lying to me for years. And the amount of drama in her life would make a soap opera look mild. I just couldn’t take it anymore. I once met a woman from Craigslist. Not sure how that came about but that friendship didn’t last more than six months. She was a loon. She later asked me why I stopped seeing her and I told her we had nothing in common. One former friend was a lot like the one you described - only around when she was dumped by some guy.

 

You’re right, though, that when you pare things down, you’re only left with so many people. As Oprah once said, if you have one or two good friends, you’re lucky.

[Wallysbears]

I don’t associate with people of low moral character. This became even easier when I had my son.

 

If I don’t want my son to have their traits - I cut them out of my/our lives.

[Arieswoman]

primer,

Oh my goodness, where do I start?

 

 

Over the past 20 years (excluding my exH);

 

 

 

I removed a person from my life who had mental health problems. She was just too demanding.

 

 

I removed a male colleague from my life because he was always bringing his work problems to me (and 4 other women) he asked our opinions and then picked the course of action that was nearest to what he was going to do anyway. He had a problem just about every week!

 

 

 

I removed a female 'friend' from my life because she bad-mouthed me (she never thought I'd find out but I did)

 

 

I removed myself from a hobbies group because one woman there was always putting me down and belittling me, and the other women said nothing (who needs 'friends' like that?!)

 

 

 

I stopped attending a church because some of the members were always sticking their noses in my business.

 

 

I removed a girl from my life because she was always asking advice about the toxic men she took up with, and then didn't take it.

 

 

 

I now have about 3 close friends I can count on, and they on me. My life is so much better without those negative characters !

[chillii]

Yep many times through life, l removed one just tonight actually , it's just best. l like the guy and he basically has a good heart , but he's mad and for my own good l have to give up on him and stay the hell away from him.

l've always found that the hardest things, giving up on them.

No problem if they have a mean streak of some sort so much , they're pretty easy l have no time for b@tches and A'H's.

But it's more just the bit crazy ones. They do often come with a good heart and some lovable characteristics , but they're just too crazy.

Edited February 1, 2019 by chillii

[Otter2569]

I have done the exact same thing over the years. I call it growing and reprioritizing. Personally I feel much better and couldn't be happier but like you, there are very few people I consider true friends.

 

 

Quality over quantity and good riddance to old rubbish

[Iamthenew50]

YES in fact I have stopped associating with my half siblings completely and a couple friends. My siblings only loved drama and would LOVE to get me in the middle play me against each other. They were not there for me as a child and proved themselves to be quite dysfunctional later in life. My half sister would send me horribly mean emails about my past decisions that I made in my life and tell me how horrible I was for making those decisions. And my half brother- well too much money and prescription drugs made him into an incredibly unrealistic person.

Friends- yes- I have supported and been there for- which I get nothing in return. Gone..

The older I get the less people I need around me. And I a fine with that. My German Shepherd provides me with great comfort that most humans cannot.