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A very deep question (Proceed with Caution)


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Old 23rd January 2018, 4:29 AM   #1
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Exclamation A very deep question (Proceed with Caution)

First of all, I would like to apologize if this is in the wrong section. I have tried to find the best section match-up with what I am about to say yet can't seem to find the best one. So, I picked this because it is the closest one to what I want to describe.

Prologue:
After I have watched an anime named "School days" (In case you never watch it, it is about story with triangle love where 2 women are in love with the protagonist. I mention this because this is related to part of my life and what I want to ask. To make this short, the protagonist => in Love with woman he admired, her beauty, innocent, cute, shy and feminism. His best friend helped him get her, they become lovers. Time passes, protagonist has slow decreasing interest to that woman, boring due to awkward dating, hold hands and force kissing to her. Eventually, went to his best friend as he realized he loves her and she does too with a bit seducing to him (But also, unfaithful to his best friend since went sleeping with other friends of her, just to be sure, you can watch the anime). Yet again, the woman at first is a simple like to the main character (on a scale 1 to 10, i'll say 3). Time goes by, her feeling increases to the point she wants to do anything for her and will deny anything about breaking up regardless of the rumor he doesn't like her. ONLY when the protagonist mentioned it directly to her will she finally get broken up in mental and goes into insanity (Such as constant believing he is still her boyfriend and called him despite being blocked and voice call mail alert, can be seen there is no life in her eye). When his best friend get pregnant and proclaim in public, his life ruins and throw her away. Other characters start blocking him. His former lover came and met him unexpectedly and while still insane state says anything about waiting for him and do anything he wants to and always love him until protagonist realizes he loves her all the whole time and hugged her which caused her insanity gone and her life back as shown in her eye. His best friend found out and angry and both gave her advice abortion which leads her killing protagonist. As soon as the woman found out, she went into insane state again which decapitates her former lover head, showing it to his best friend and then killing his best friend. In the end, it is shown she cuddled with his severed head in the sunshine in the boat.

(I am sorry for long prologue, I can't find the way to shorten it up. But this should be clear of what I want to ask. If the story is still vague, first BOLD UNDERLINE is in Ep. 1, second BOLD UNDERLINE is in Ep. 10, the third BOLD UNDERLINE is in Ep. 11 and the final one is in final episode)

Main Point of Question:
What I really want to ask is when I encountered this kind of event (which unlikely since I am already 24 and not in school anymore, but still may happen in other places), if i ever meet that type of woman (which I really hope I can find due to Nature loving and her dedication type), should I be afraid or concerned that this kind of personality may lead to insanity one day if I hurt her intentionally or unintentionally? I mean granted, the other people in this world are cruel, bringing pain one to another. You name it, false rumor to make jealousy, bullying and etc which cause Yandere part despite the man never do anything wrong to hurt her. Of course, don't forget that no relationship is perfect as there will be always arguing and constant boring. I begin to think I want that kind of woman (the faithfulness, innocent) but I am worried that the Dark nature of human being of personality will show up. Once that shows up, recovery is not something to be done easily. In prologue case, woman always protects protagonist and didn't do anything harm, however, protagonist managed to bring her back. In other cases, woman may hurt the man. This kind of woman typically is very rare, well, according to me. If that happens to me, I am very happy that the woman shows very deep faithfulness but at the same time was deeply sad because she is completely BROKEN. How am I supposed to make recovery to her if that happens? Better yet, how am i supposed to prevent her to be trapped in Dark nature or Yandere? Even if the dark nature is not something to hurt people but just become insanity of not knowing the reality and can't accept it but keep believing him to be the lovers. I mean, granted if the dark nature shows extreme possessive and faithfulness to you, that is great because we know that her love is simply beyond what we expect. But, eventually, that will become darker and darker until you come back to her, That's what fear me. If you don't, she might target other people related to your friend. What if you break up with her because you find something disturbance from her dark past during in relationship, criminal history, unhappy family despite still loving her and believe that this is better for both of us? Some of you may believe people change, what if she's not? Honestly, this is a very DEEP QUESTION that I have been thinking. Ever since I watched this anime, I cant help but think about this as some of these happened to me before although not all. (See Side question)

I was never lucky in relationship or love due to many dumps from my ex lovers. From what I learn, the innocent type one is the one that matches with me since my personality is quite active yet also shy in dating. It is just my assumption that innocent type will almost always be faithful. I have been daydreaming often and uses Mind Simulator of what if this event occurs. The results are always unexpected or unclear. This just keeps making me uneasy and hurt because of the dark nature.

If you have to ask me what is coming to my mind of this question, It is about faithfulness and devotion yet causes insanity. If you are also wondering why I am asking this, readers can look at side question to which some parts of the prologue happened to me.

Side Question:
To be honest, about little to some parts of the story above happened to me except the part of unfaithful, cheating, and best friend love and helping are not there with the insanity part. Also, the roles are reversed.

I have been in a situation of triangle love when I took an interest with a woman whom I saw (Innocent, shy, feminism, cute but got bullied) but I was already in love with another person and in relationship. I was kinda hard to decide of whom I wanted to choose (Still in relationship). I had no idea that the woman really loved me until one day she decided to tell me that she was having a brain cancer disease and that's when I was still in relationship. I was traumatized, tortured by this feeling due to my ex not having feeling to me while in relationship (As I later found out, I was just accepted because of mercy). After that, she cheated on me and went to another man. Before she told me about the disease and when I told her about my relationship, I am pretty sure 100% SHE MUST HAVE EMOTIONAL BREAKDOWN. How do you feel if the person you love are already in relationship to others? About 50% will go crazy and become dark, 50% will let go. I am happy she accepted it and wanted me to be happy. She was hurt both physically and mentally, I hurt her unintentionally about this. Despite that, she should have gone into Dark state because she also got bullied by other classmates of her due to her disease known. The same goes as the prologue above, the woman got bullied too. But in my case, she didn't become dark. She became the light and still showed faithfulness and devotion. I am telling you readers, this type of woman is even EXTREMELY RARE, not going into dark state after being hurt. I was totally DUMB, DUMB and DUMB not to choose her. By the time, I realize that I want her, She's gone. I was alone again and my ex was quite happy with her new one.

I remembered I was the one who became Dark state or Yandere. I couldn't feel anything. I constantly believed she was still there, believed the world is gone. I did not harm anybody even my ex. I am telling you readers, it happened to me and It took me long time to recover. It was her final wish, bracelet and her letters that made me shine again. Now, what if this happened to my future lover one day? I don't think I have the power to recover her from that.

The difference role between this and the prologue is:

1. I became the woman's role
2. My ex became the protagonist role but didn't come back to me in the end.
3. No best friend helped me, thus no love from best friend.
4. No cheating, unfaithfulness.
5. No pregnant part
6. Insanity was on me but not to the extreme like the last sentence in prologue.
7. Despite having double feeling in relationship, there is no signs of cheating and yet still devoted to my ex.

As the readers have read, what can you tell me from this? If you have experienced it, kindly share if you can. If you haven't, you may ask yourself this too what will happen to you.

Message:
It is only 1:10000000000 that this kind of woman exists. Once you have it, never let her go.

PS:
Sorry about the grammar and if the words structure are hard to understand. I am so sorry.
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Old 23rd January 2018, 4:34 AM   #2
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I'm sorry, it is very hard to understand. I think this would be far easier to answer if you simply wrote your own story without reference to fictional stories.
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Old 23rd January 2018, 4:39 AM   #3
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Originally Posted by basil67 View Post
I'm sorry, it is very hard to understand. I think this would be far easier to answer if you simply wrote your own story without reference to fictional stories.
Do you think so? I think so too but if I don't relate it, this makes the main question even harder to ask. I'll try in the future
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Old 11th March 2018, 8:00 PM   #4
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Uh, what's your question here?

Ask it in one sentence.
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Old 13th March 2018, 12:02 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by health View Post
Uh, what's your question here?

Ask it in one sentence.
Thanks for replying. So, to make it short, what would you do if you find your lover was unable to let you go that she'd become insane and start hurting other people that maybe you know as your friends in order to keep you as herself only?
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Old 14th March 2018, 12:06 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by wiselyzzz View Post
Thanks for replying. So, to make it short, what would you do if you find your lover was unable to let you go that she'd become insane and start hurting other people that maybe you know as your friends in order to keep you as herself only?
You call the police.
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Old 14th March 2018, 12:18 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by HiCrunchy View Post
You call the police.
Wow, that simple. How about without involving police? What would be the solution to bring her sanity back?
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Old 14th March 2018, 1:21 PM   #8
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Play it out. If you want to leave, leave. Peacefully. Ignore confrontation or threats, presuming they are verbal. If the person has a history of actually harming themselves or others, meaning verifiable and exigent threats or actions, then take stronger measures.

One should never feel they are another's prisoner. It's your life. Fight for it if need be. Do what you have to do, for you. People are born and die every second. The planet continues.
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Old 14th March 2018, 3:11 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by carhill View Post
Play it out. If you want to leave, leave. Peacefully. Ignore confrontation or threats, presuming they are verbal. If the person has a history of actually harming themselves or others, meaning verifiable and exigent threats or actions, then take stronger measures.

One should never feel they are another's prisoner. It's your life. Fight for it if need be. Do what you have to do, for you. People are born and die every second. The planet continues.
I see. Despite that it may be hurt, we should take risk or sacrifice the feelings then. A friend of mine gave me an advice that if the person became like that, then it means in the beginning she had worn the mask. From innocent and pure becomes sadistic and cruel. Truth to be told, there is no way to detect the mask.
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Old 14th March 2018, 5:55 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by wiselyzzz View Post
Wow, that simple. How about without involving police? What would be the solution to bring her sanity back?
Yep, it's that simple
If she lost her sanity, u should involve the police.
Therapy
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Old 14th March 2018, 6:31 PM   #11
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Dude... my advice? One that I give to others here?

STOP dwelling in day dreams, imaginary relationships, comparing real life scenarios to anime etc.

I really think it does very little good - and a fair bit of harm, because now you have come to all sorts of conclusions as to how you imagine things will play out - yet your imaginary world isn't dealing with the complexities of real life humans.

Okay your first part - this was a fictional animation - discard. Do not expect people to follow the same model.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wiselyzzz View Post
Main Point of Question:
What I really want to ask is when I encountered this kind of event (which unlikely since I am already 24 and not in school anymore, but still may happen in other places), if i ever meet that type of woman (which I really hope I can find due to Nature loving and her dedication type), should I be afraid or concerned that this kind of personality may lead to insanity one day if I hurt her intentionally or unintentionally?
1. You are asking how an imaginary person might behave and react. Humans are too complex to predict this. Meet the girl first, then ask questions.

2. Don't intentionally hurt people, especially loved ones, it usually does not go well.

3. Mental illness does not discriminate. It affects all walks of life, all ages, races, genders, and personality types. Again, you are asking about how an imaginary woman will react to an imaginary scenario.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wiselyzzz View Post
I begin to think I want that kind of woman (the faithfulness, innocent) but I am worried that the Dark nature of human being of personality will show up.
Humans are not one dimensional, and no two are the same. They are complex, and it usually takes years to really know someone.

Meet someone first - get to know them. NO ONE can say "yes all kind women have a "dark nature" or no, kind women do not have a dark nature.

Life ins't black and white like that.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wiselyzzz View Post
How am I supposed to make recovery to her if that happens? Better yet, how am i supposed to prevent her to be trapped in Dark nature or Yandere?
Again, this is all fantasy at the moment, complete with anime terminology. Tell us about the REAL GIRL you know that you are worried about.

Quote:
Originally Posted by wiselyzzz View Post
As the readers have read, what can you tell me from this? If you have experienced it, kindly share if you can. If you haven't, you may ask yourself this too what will happen to you.
Never experienced what you have attempted to describe, nor have I witnessed it in real life. I don't spend time wondering about what ifs that are very unlikely to affect my life.

I prefer studying sociology and psychology to understand human emotion, and human interaction.
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Old 15th March 2018, 10:36 AM   #12
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Originally Posted by RecentChange View Post
Dude... my advice? One that I give to others here?

STOP dwelling in day dreams, imaginary relationships, comparing real life scenarios to anime etc.

I really think it does very little good - and a fair bit of harm, because now you have come to all sorts of conclusions as to how you imagine things will play out - yet your imaginary world isn't dealing with the complexities of real life humans.

Okay your first part - this was a fictional animation - discard. Do not expect people to follow the same model.



1. You are asking how an imaginary person might behave and react. Humans are too complex to predict this. Meet the girl first, then ask questions.

2. Don't intentionally hurt people, especially loved ones, it usually does not go well.

3. Mental illness does not discriminate. It affects all walks of life, all ages, races, genders, and personality types. Again, you are asking about how an imaginary woman will react to an imaginary scenario.



Humans are not one dimensional, and no two are the same. They are complex, and it usually takes years to really know someone.

Meet someone first - get to know them. NO ONE can say "yes all kind women have a "dark nature" or no, kind women do not have a dark nature.

Life ins't black and white like that.



Again, this is all fantasy at the moment, complete with anime terminology. Tell us about the REAL GIRL you know that you are worried about.



Never experienced what you have attempted to describe, nor have I witnessed it in real life. I don't spend time wondering about what ifs that are very unlikely to affect my life.

I prefer studying sociology and psychology to understand human emotion, and human interaction.
Answers number 2 and number 3 are what I needed. Thanks for your advice. Why I am asking this is not because it is imaginary to me. It's already real. Based on the story of mine from this http://www.loveshack.org/forums/brea...-my-ex-fiancee. Coincidentally, you have the very same answer or advice from my best friend gave. Very much same. You are right about one thing; no humans are the same. They have all different personality. At least, let me give you my thanks for already read the long story part.
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Old 16th March 2018, 4:36 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by wiselyzzz View Post
Thanks for replying. So, to make it short, what would you do if you find your lover was unable to let you go that she'd become insane and start hurting other people that maybe you know as your friends in order to keep you as herself only?
Thanks for simplifying this! 👍

Personally, I would love that situation. Thatis if I loved her to begin with. I'm insecure sometimes, so for a girl to likeme that much - it'd putme at ease.

If she attempted to hurt others physically or in any other way. Id have her stop. If she couldnt then Id tell her to get some mental health help.
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Old 17th March 2018, 1:17 PM   #14
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Thanks for simplifying this! 👍

Personally, I would love that situation. Thatis if I loved her to begin with. I'm insecure sometimes, so for a girl to likeme that much - it'd putme at ease.

If she attempted to hurt others physically or in any other way. Id have her stop. If she couldnt then Id tell her to get some mental health help.
My god, I think you have the same answer as my mind before being given advice. Yeah, tbh i love that situation too cause it actually proved that the girl loved me. I'm also insecure up to this day. I count only one girl in my whole life to have ever confessed to me and she's no longer alive. So, if any girl confessed to me, i would be at ease.

If she hurts physically, i would do the same thing as you which is to ask her stop and in addition, ask her what's the reason she does that. You know how people are cruel these days? Environmental may affect mental health of the victim too?
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Old 17th March 2018, 4:48 PM   #15
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Why don't you both go get psychological counseling together to get to the bottom of it.
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