b1a4 Posted October 22, 2016 Share Posted October 22, 2016 I work as a teacher in a school in South Korea. One of my co-workers, I'll call him J, tried to sleep with me about 4 months ago. He started sending random texts at night (just small talk) and then on my birthday he asked if I had any plans, and alluded to sex by saying "What about your birthday present?" I told him I would so do him (I am interested in him) but I didn't want things to be awkward in the workplace. I asked if we could be just cuddle buddies and he was alright with that. We cuddled a couple times that month and we did some touching but I resisted anything further and he controlled himself. So after that we didn't talk outside of work for a long time but about 2 weeks ago he started sending me texts after work again. Like one was almost right after we got home from work (we live on the same street) he said "How are you since the last time I saw you which was 30 minutes ago? :p" I asked him to stop beating around the bush and tell me why he was texting me and he said "would you believe me if I said I was texting you for no reason?" and I said "If you just want to talk to me, that's a reason." and he said "I want to talk to you." and then we just texted about random things and he listened to my problems and stuff. He was texting me like every other night, and even at work he's been paying more attention to me, trying to help me with my out of control students and he teases me more than usual. And on Friday my boss offered to introduce him to a Korean girl but he said he doesn't want to date Korean girls any more. I was surprised because he is half Korean and most dudes who come to Korea are more interested in Korean girls and this makes me think I have more of a chance with him. Anyways last night after work me and him and our two other guy coworkers ate dinner and drank together. After we went home J texted me and asked if I wanted to come over. So I did and we watched videos and cuddled together but he was having a hard time controlling himself so he ended up sleeping on the couch. This morning we woke up and he got up and started playing his video games. We talked a little bit but after that he was just playing his game, didn't seem to want to do anything with me although I offered to watch a k-drama together (he said no really bluntly, I didn't take offense because he has a very blunt personality). So in the afternoon I was still dozing in his bed and he told me he had to buy some stuff and that it was time for me to go home (not in a rude way just blunt as usual) Now I'm just feeling so confused... he's clearly sexually attracted to me and from his recent messaged he made it sound like he likes more than just my appearance. But why when we finally cuddle together again, he seems so uninterested the next day and he doesn't mention anything about actually dating. It might be because we're co-workers (I mean, I'm hesitant to date a co-worker too because things might not end well and I don't want to have to change jobs because of that). Our contract will end after 6 more months and we will go to different schools. But can someone tell me what is going on in this guy's head?? I wasn't even that into him until he started showing so much interest in me! Btw I am 22 and he is 26, he has a big ego and has clearly slept with a lot of girls Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Gloria25 Posted October 22, 2016 Share Posted October 22, 2016 He wants to have sex with you. He has no feelings for you. Geesh, and I wouldn't "cuddle" with some guy. Guys aren't gonna "cuddle" with you unless they felt that would be an opening to it escalating. You're overseas. Some guys want vagina that reminds them of home. I mean literally, I hear the story of a soldier who had people send him pancake syrup home made from where he was from. That syrup made his deployment better cuz it was like that little thing that reminded him of being home. Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted October 22, 2016 Share Posted October 22, 2016 He's sexually attracted to you. It means he wants sex. There is not much indication here that he's interested in more than that, hence his bluntness. If you are looking for a romantic relationship, I wouldn't bother with him. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted October 22, 2016 Share Posted October 22, 2016 He is only offering you a fwb/fb arrangement, he doesn't want to date you. The fact you have gone as far as "cuddling", means in his mind you may be persuaded at some point to have sex with him. He is playing the long game here. If you are up for NSA sex and expect little else, then great, if you want a "relationship", then forget it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author b1a4 Posted October 23, 2016 Author Share Posted October 23, 2016 Wow. When he said he just wanted to talk with me, I said "Glad to know I'm not just your hopeful booty call" and he said "Sorry if I made it seem that way." Guess that was a lie Thanks for clearing that up guys Link to post Share on other sites
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