Keats Posted November 18, 2015 Posted November 18, 2015 What I mean is, why do women have to teach men how to treat them as simple human beings. We're human, we have feelings and we hurt. It isn't hard. I feel women probably have more good sense on how to handle men as human beings than men have on how to handle women as human beings. Am I generalising? Sorry if I am. Please correct me. I'm obviously missing something or am skewered. I just feel that if a woman doesn't instruct a man she invariably gets trampled on. I have found personally telling a man how to treat me in a way so they don't hurt me, is just tiring, demeaning and at this point is making me feel so worthless
GunslingerRoland Posted November 18, 2015 Posted November 18, 2015 We teach each person we meet (regardless of sex) how to treat us and they will treat us that way. 5
basil67 Posted November 18, 2015 Posted November 18, 2015 I'd say that you find yourself teaching men because you take on the guys that the rest of us reject. Thing is, we DON'T have to teach a man how to treat us. If we don't like how they treat us, we dump them and find a man who does know how to treat us. And for the record, I have found that many, many men know how to treat others well. 3
Redfisher Posted November 18, 2015 Posted November 18, 2015 Your meeting the wrong guys.....I can't be the only guy who knows how to treat a woman, 3
Robert Z Posted November 19, 2015 Posted November 19, 2015 What I mean is, why do women have to teach men how to treat them as simple human beings. We're human, we have feelings and we hurt. It isn't hard. I feel women probably have more good sense on how to handle men as human beings than men have on how to handle women as human beings. Am I generalising? Sorry if I am. Please correct me. I'm obviously missing something or am skewered. I just feel that if a woman doesn't instruct a man she invariably gets trampled on. I have found personally telling a man how to treat me in a way so they don't hurt me, is just tiring, demeaning and at this point is making me feel so worthless Have you ever considered that men may not like the way you treat them? Your sense of superiority is the first thing that grabs my attention. 3
Tayla Posted November 19, 2015 Posted November 19, 2015 What I mean is, why do women have to teach men how to treat them as simple human beings. We're human, we have feelings and we hurt. It isn't hard. I feel women probably have more good sense on how to handle men as human beings than men have on how to handle women as human beings. Am I generalising? Sorry if I am. Please correct me. I'm obviously missing something or am skewered. I just feel that if a woman doesn't instruct a man she invariably gets trampled on. I have found personally telling a man how to treat me in a way so they don't hurt me, is just tiring, demeaning and at this point is making me feel so worthless Its your perception and it seems to fit what has happened in your interactions. No need to apologize. Since you are choosing to use the Male to female interaction, I will say this. Some dogs you cannot teach new tricks too. This holds true in relations and behaviors whether modifying them or addressing. As the saying goes, actions speak louder then words.... You are not accountable for anothers' actions, You are accountable to maintain your level of regard and carry civility in daily interactions.
RecentChange Posted November 19, 2015 Posted November 19, 2015 I can't say I relate to your post at all. But I do agree with others, maybe do not get into relationships with men who do not treat women as human beings.
Samhain Posted November 19, 2015 Posted November 19, 2015 Maybe you have a personality that attracts the wrong type of men. I've never had to have a woman instruct me on how to treat her, it's already a given. Maybe instead of "instructing them how to treat you", after they treat you in a way you dislike you could drop them and move on. Or maybe Robert has a point and some guys don't like the way you treat them. Relationships are 50/50 effort from both partners, not just one giving instructions to the other about how to fulfill their own needs. A whole lot of maybes on this one! 1
Heatherknows Posted November 19, 2015 Posted November 19, 2015 What I mean is, why do women have to teach men how to treat them as simple human beings. We're human, we have feelings and we hurt. It isn't hard. I feel women probably have more good sense on how to handle men as human beings than men have on how to handle women as human beings. Am I generalising? Sorry if I am. Please correct me. I'm obviously missing something or am skewered. I just feel that if a woman doesn't instruct a man she invariably gets trampled on. I have found personally telling a man how to treat me in a way so they don't hurt me, is just tiring, demeaning and at this point is making me feel so worthless What exactly are you teaching them?
preraph Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 Here we get into overgeneralizing, but suffice it to say that someone has to teach everyone how to be a decent human being and considerate and that for some men, whose goals with women are often no more lofty than getting them to have sex, if their mom and dad didn't teach them better manners and some empathy, then it's up to women to set boundaries. There are plenty of men who, though they may be willing to act better with someone they eventually want to keep, are in the meanwhile just as happy to come and go as they please getting sex and leaving nothing behind to build a relationship. If you are a woman who doesn't just want casual sex, then obviously, you have to not let men put you in that category by saying no and not letting them make excuses and show up late and never plan anything, etc. And I will say that there are women like that too, though it's not usually sex that motivates them.
alphamale Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 I have found personally telling a man how to treat me in a way so they don't hurt me, is just tiring, demeaning and at this point is making me feel so worthless many women like bad boys who treat them badly
TexasMan68 Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 Because no one taught them growing up how to respect and honor women.
stillafool Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 I think we have to teach everyone how to treat us, not just men. We can do this through our actions toward them. Treat others the way you want to be treated. It's not a men thing.
basil67 Posted November 20, 2015 Posted November 20, 2015 I think we have to teach everyone how to treat us, not just men. We can do this through our actions toward them. Treat others the way you want to be treated. It's not a men thing. Or even better, treat others they way *they* want to be treated
mightycpa Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 What I mean is, why do women have to teach men how to treat them as simple human beings. We're human, we have feelings and we hurt. It isn't hard. I feel women probably have more good sense on how to handle men as human beings than men have on how to handle women as human beings. Am I generalising? Sorry if I am. Please correct me. I'm obviously missing something or am skewered. I just feel that if a woman doesn't instruct a man she invariably gets trampled on. I have found personally telling a man how to treat me in a way so they don't hurt me, is just tiring, demeaning and at this point is making me feel so worthless My experience is that you project something that makes men think they can treat you poorly. For example, the first time that you experience this, you probably stick around instead of bolting. If it happens over and over again, they are reacting to something you're doing. If the whole world treats you the same way, then you have to start considering that it is you, and not the world.
Woggle Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 The solution is to pick better men and for men to pick better women. You can't change somebody who doesn't treat you well.
Wewon Posted November 21, 2015 Posted November 21, 2015 What I mean is, why do women have to teach men how to treat them as simple human beings. We're human, we have feelings and we hurt. It isn't hard. I feel women probably have more good sense on how to handle men as human beings than men have on how to handle women as human beings. Am I generalising? Sorry if I am. Please correct me. I'm obviously missing something or am skewered. I just feel that if a woman doesn't instruct a man she invariably gets trampled on. I have found personally telling a man how to treat me in a way so they don't hurt me, is just tiring, demeaning and at this point is making me feel so worthless Yes, you are making generalizations, but that's fine. We all make them on a messageboard, otherwise we could never have an effective conversation about such things. We would spend all of our time digging for more and more detail until we created the finger print that is your specific scenario. From the sound of it, your problem sounds like knowing how to draw boundaries that people (read:men) respect. It could be that your are not saying what you expect explicitly as opposed to hinting and getting frustrated that men don't know your cues. I don't think that most people set out to hurt each other, they usually trip over boundaries that the other person assumed were clear. 1
dichotomy Posted December 11, 2015 Posted December 11, 2015 I know right ? why is this ? Ya know because perfect, nice, sweet caring gentlemen get all the devoted women and tons hot sex. Flame suit on. 2
joystickd Posted December 12, 2015 Posted December 12, 2015 The problem here is YOU. When it comes to romantic interactions a person needs to be accountable for the fact they choose these people and accept the bad behavior. The woman that complains about men wanting sex, treating them bad, etc needs to look in herself for the answers. She is the common denominator in all of the interactions.
thefooloftheyear Posted December 12, 2015 Posted December 12, 2015 Nothing more demeaning and unattractive than a "trained man"..... TFY
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