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Getting mixed signals?


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TheGagagirl1234

First, I would like to say sorry for my English because it isn't my first language. Some friends from a game recommended this website for me so now I'll try to write about my problem and see where it goes..

 

There was this cute guy at my college who moved away, and I really like him but I'm getting mixed signals - both from him and his friends as well. Before he moved he didn't pay much attention to me when we were in group. We were always in the same group of friends and lived in the same house. We only talked when we were alone, and he always asked random questions like: "How was your day/weekend?" or "What did you do today?"

It was always the same questions he asked, but when we had a "conversation" he usually talked about himself A LOT.

Before he moved we went to a party, and I sat next to him in the beginning. I heard some of his friends say to him: "Why don't you go and dance with (insert my name here?)" but he didn't? He just said "No"

Later, I saw him flirt with another girl in front of me - twice. But he stopped as soon as I left, even though they were in the same room all the time, and then he went home with his friends. My girl friend stayed home because she was sick, and when I wasn't there I heard them have this conversation:

My girl friend: "How did it go?"

Him: "She got mad when I flirted with (insert other girls name here)"

 

Now they act really weird around me (they are having weird, meaningless conversations when I'm there, they ask me very personal questions, and they laugh in the background when I'm not there..) I'm not sure what's going on and I don't like it because I've heard my friends say: "Do you think that (insert other girls name has feelings for him?"

But after they asked me these personal questions I've heard them say: "I've talked with her and I think that she is in love with him"

Now I am so confused because I don't know if he likes me or the other girl..

A few days before he moved, I've heard him have this conversation with his friends:

Him: "Do you think that (insert my name here) knows it?"

His friend: "I don't know"

Him: "She doesn't talk much"

His friend: "Maybe she's just shy?"

Him: "It's not worth it anymore"

 

So.. What do you think?

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When he said, "It's not worth it anymore," what he meant was that he feels that he made an effort or made his feelings known and it was not reciprocated. He believes that you're either playing hard to get, not picking up on the cues, have no feelings for him, or something along those lines... and doesn't believe that a sustained effort will yield results. Of course, what you feel may be entirely different. I'm thinking that if you like this guy you need to drag his ass under the staircase and stick your tongue down is throat to make things a bit less ambiguous.

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TheGagagirl1234
When he said, "It's not worth it anymore," what he meant was that he feels that he made an effort or made his feelings known and it was not reciprocated. He believes that you're either playing hard to get, not picking up on the cues, have no feelings for him, or something along those lines... and doesn't believe that a sustained effort will yield results. Of course, what you feel may be entirely different. I'm thinking that if you like this guy you need to drag his ass under the staircase and stick your tongue down is throat to make things a bit less ambiguous.

 

Thanks for the help, it was really useful! :D

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When he said, "It's not worth it anymore," what he meant was that he feels that he made an effort or made his feelings known and it was not reciprocated. He believes that you're either playing hard to get, not picking up on the cues, have no feelings for him, or something along those lines...

 

Bingo....lesson to be learned here? Do not play games kids, and contrary to what your little friends might have told you (you have to see how it is working out for them), the most decent thing to do will always be to reciprocate affection if you have any interest in that person.

 

Head games and drama will only get you dumped eventually, and sometimes it happens with the person you are most interested in...hence the reason why some women struggle with being dumped. Karma really is a b1t**

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TheGagagirl1234

I think I have an explanation - there might be two options: He either really likes me, but he and his friends are afraid of making a move, because he thinks that the girl likes him.. Or he may have feelings for both of us, but can't decide :eek:

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I don't think he's a great guy.

 

If he was interested in you, why did he flirt with that girl at the party instead of talking to you ?

Why didn't he just come out and say it, instead of all these exponentially difficult hints ?

 

You might need to have a discussion with him.

I suspect he's shy, but some of the stuff that you said also hints at having social skills.

 

PS: Talking about yourself a lot can mean shyness; it's an attempt to broadcast that there is some value concerning you, but you are scared you won't get to put it all out, so you end up with verbal diarrhea.

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TheGagagirl1234
I don't think he's a great guy.

 

If he was interested in you, why did he flirt with that girl at the party instead of talking to you ?

Why didn't he just come out and say it, instead of all these exponentially difficult hints ?

 

Yeah, it confuses me too.. I really don't get it, and I don't like the way his friends act around me. It creeps me totally out, and I don't know why. The only thing he did at the party was to ask me the most ridiculous question. He asked if the food was good, and he didn't even make it lol. When I replied, he just nodded and looked at the table, and then he started to flirt with her. But I don't get why he stopped when I left. That makes no sense at all!

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