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Posted

About a year ago I met a man on Facebook. We IMed one another, then he said we should meet. I said ok. I met him and made it clear to him that I was not interested in him being anything other than a friend immediately, which he said ok to. I introduced him to many of my friends, even brought him into my theater company of which he is a great asset (as a carpenter and set builder).

 

 

There is, however, a problem : he is very needy and clingy. Almost EVERY NIGHT he sends a chat request, whether I am home in front of the computer or not. He sends a text sometimes (he also never used to text let alone did he even own a cell phone before I met him) asking if I want to chat. Sometimes I respond ("I'm at a bar", "I'm busy", "I'm with someone", etc.) and other times I don't. If I do a location check in on FourSquare or Facebook, he asks if I want to join him there. That I never respond to. There are times when I am in the same room with him and he follows me around, literally. Many times I have left the room to go to the bathroom, I open the door and he is there, waiting for me. I asked if he needed to go and was just waiting in line, he said no. I asked why he followed me then, he said he just wanted to.

 

 

I know what the immediate response of anyone reading this will say "He's interested and has been friendzoned." Agreed. Since he and I had met, I have been through a few boyfriends here and there and shared the tales of the ups and downs with him. I have, in order to keep him at a certain distance, treated him, more or less, like a girlfriend. I don't know what else I can do to drive it home to him. Other than sitting him down and telling him that I find his literal following me around the room creepy and needy, what else can I do?

Posted

It *is* creepy. Can you broach with him that it's weird?

 

Does he have interest in women in general? Do you mix with his friends also?

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Posted

To answer that question, I don't really think he has many friends that he sees on a regular basis at least. I know this because I have never met any of his, nor does he tell me about doing things or seeing them.

 

 

It's quite annoying to be honest. I have tried to be rude about it as well to try to give him a message. I am in a crowded room, I get up and go to the bathroom which is in the other room without telling anyone that's where I'm going. I close the bathroom door, do my business in there, then open the door to find him standing there. The first time that happened I asked if he was waiting for the bathroom, he said no. After the third time that happened, I just walk right past him and back to where I came from. I would think that he would get the message after a while. Plus, I learned a long time ago not to bother others (or at least keep a certain distance from them).

 

 

I'm sure he's aware that he does this, he might not be but ... What can I do about this?

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