Players vs. sluts

[questionlife]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

[Eternal Sunshine]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

 

Most men love to be called players.

[Revolver]

I never liked the term player because it implies that a man would have to lie, decieve, or "play" girls to sleep with many women at a time and if I've learned anything about life that's not true at all.

 

I've known guys who have "dated" 3,4,5,6 girls at once and they all knew about each other and were cool with it.

[GoodOnPaper]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

 

No. For a lot of men, the sensitive point -- where "success" or "failure" is determined -- is at the meeting/attracting phase. Therefore, being a player has positive connotations. For a lot of women, the sensitive point is moving to the exclusive relationship. ONSs and flings aren't viewed as positively in this frame of reference.

[BradJacobs]

Most men love to be called players.

I believe players love to be called players.

 

Some of us men just want to be called men and are insulted when a woman says something like, "I think you're a player because you're too XYZ to be single."

[JuneJulySeptember]

Almost completely different.

 

There are female players. They will rope guys in, sometimes very intentionally, sometimes less so, and lead them on because they like the attention. Or, they'll use their attractiveness to get things from men like helping them move, etc. Almost every guy has been played or used by a woman. Those are the women who are equivalent to the pump and dump guys. They are using people to get what they want.

 

Sluts aren't using guys because by and large most guys want sex from them.

[Woggle]

I don't like the world slut but women can be players as well. Players use people but there are men and women who have casual sex honestly without playing with people's emotions.

 

Also being a player does not hurt a man's chances with many women while being known as a slut will hurt a woman's chances with finding a relationship. I wish both men and women would realize that players do not turn into good relationship partners but it seems like men don't have the delusions of converting a player like many women do. Men have their own delusions but that is not one of them. Most of us know exactly what we are getting when we mess around with certain women.

[phineas]

To be honest, the majority of time I hear a woman referred to as a slut it is by another woman.

Those same women have also called men players.

I've also noticed those women are known to lead men on & are never in a serious relationship.

 

When I've heard men refer to women as sluts it's usually when the woman sleeps with men to further herself or when they literally go out every weekend & hook up with a random guy.

Funnily enough, it's usually the guys who go out every weekend & hook up with random women calling women sluts.

 

Coincidence?

I don't think so.

 

Essentially, hater's gonna hate.

Edited June 29, 2013 by phineas

[JuneJulySeptember]

To be honest, the majority of time I hear a woman referred to as a slut it is by another woman.

Those same women have also called men players.

I've also noticed those women are known to lead men on & are never in a serious relationship.

 

 

Yes.

 

What I was saying. It's ironic that the women who call men players are really players themselves. They lead unattractive men on, get them to drive them to Ikea to pick up furniture and crap like that.

[tbf]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

No. Equivalents would be:

 

Player -- > playerette

Slut --> man slut

[Divasu]

Such a fruitless topic...

 

PS.

Get a real hobby

[MissBee]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

 

No.

 

Being a "player" is not insulting to men, in fact, many men aspire to be such and see it as a badge of honor and society does not at all frown upon a player in the same way it slut shames women.

 

Slut is supposed to shame a woman and make her feel bad about herself in hopes to change and control her behavior to that of a "good woman", player isn't employed in the same way at all.

[hppr]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

 

A player is a pimp, a gangster or a hustler. A slut is just a slut. So no not the same.

[Southern Cal Dude]

Women are attracted to players and reward them. That's the opposite of a slut. And the majority who call women sluts...are other women.

[Revolver]

I'm only 22, but the vast majority of "slut shaming" I've heard of in my life is from other women. Men don't discourage sluts, its actually the opposite

[carhill]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

 

In my generation, the appropriate term for a man who is wantonly sexual, trending to the indiscriminate, has been 'womanizer'. If he's married, 'philanderer'. As far as the female side, 'floosie' and 'hussie' were words I commonly heard from my mother describing such female versions of what apparently is now commonly called 'slut', but I did see direct movie references to 'slut' in 1950's movies, so I guess the term existed in general use back then, or prior. The examples I've noted, in movies of that era recently viewed, were used by male characters.

 

I prefer 'sexually indiscriminate'. 'Free lover' also works. That was a common term used in my demographic as a young person. 'Gets around' was another, generally gender-neutral

[kaylan]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

Is this a serious question?

 

Id say the closest thing for a man is being called a man-whore, man-slut, or just a whore or slut. But even then, it doesnt hold the same weight as when you call a woman those words.

[Pompeii]

To be honest, if someone called me a "player" or a "manwhore", I'd be honored. Because in reality those words aren't harmful at all, it just means that I have options when it comes to women. I usually find that the word "manwhore" is used jokingly by female friends when referring to their male friends.

[Maleficent]

I hate both terms.

 

In both cases, there is a lot of assumption about stuff that, to begin with, are no one's business.

[Richard Friedman]

Like it or not, men are the chasers and women are the choosers. In most cases men have to pursue, wine, dine, "make the sale" in other words. We respect guys who can play the field because they're like the salesman who're great at closing deals. Otoh slut is a negative because any half decent looking women is gonna have options; the promiscuous ones are the who're unselective with theirs. Yes it's a double standard, but if you're the kind of woman who lets the guys pay, never makes the first move etc.(majority of women i've met), you can hardly complain. With power comes responsibility haha.

 

Another analogy i've heard; men are keys and woman are locks. What is a key that can break any lock? A master lock. What is a lock that is opened my any key? Useless.

[phineas]

Such a fruitless topic...

 

PS.

Get a real hobby

 

A real hobby?

Like commenting on "fruitless topics" on an internet forum?

[A O]

Is calling a man a player the same as calling a woman a slut?

In a way yes because calling someone either can prove to be the death knell of them. Players are perceived to be bullshyt artists - using deception as a means to an end. Some smooth talking people can be labelled a player even if their only crime is that they're very adept, too adept in fact at social interaction. There's no deceit in their actions - they're just too cool for school and in this day and age, thanks to the real bullshyt artists, their character maybe called into question (much like a slut is) and they can get the heave ho as a result. It happens often - he's too good to be true - there must be a catch, so on and so on....