emsieinahpets Posted November 28, 2003 Share Posted November 28, 2003 [font=century gothic][/font][color=darkblue][/color] My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a month. I've known his family for about a year and a half (he is 18, I am 14). At first I was friends with his younger brother (16) and later on became friends with his younger sister (14). Emily (the sister) became my best friend, so naturally I spent a lot of time at their house. Joe and I slowly became great friends. I was extremely close with their family. I've been to their shore house, and to family events with them. For about a month before Joe and I finally became involved, he would call me daily. Every single night we'd talk on the phone for hours. Emily had her own boyfriend so we started to drift apart, but connected back together quickly. Joe and i started to hang out more and more. Two nights ago, his mother called my parents. They talked about our friendship and our relationship. After pondering the converstation, we determined that she was feeling somewhat insecure. With a girl in the picture she is losing her son. She can no longer conrtol his life. Sunday was Emily's Confirmation. I was invited to the party at their house afterwards. It was late in the afternoon on Sunday when I realized that Emily wasn't going to call to tell me to come over. I called to ask if she still wanted me to come. While on the phone, she asked her mom if I could come over. I could hear her mom in the background saying that i'm not family and shouldn't be there. Today I was supposed to go to a wake. One of our friend's brother died. I was supposed to be going with Joe and his family to the wake. Joe asked his mom if they could pick me up, and she went insane. She started to say how its a family thing and my family isn't going so I shouldn't go. Joe and I were supposed to hang out today, but I haven't heard from him. Now I'm afraid to call his house, or even spend any time with him at all. His mom is really taking control of our friendship/relationship. What do I do to help this situation? Is there anything I can do, so that at least our friendship isn't destroyed? What about my friendship with Emily? Link to post Share on other sites
SoleMate Posted December 1, 2003 Share Posted December 1, 2003 Two nights ago, his mother called my parents. They talked about our friendship and our relationship. After pondering the converstation, we determined that she was feeling somewhat insecure. With a girl in the picture she is losing her son. Well, it could be that, of course. he is 18, I am 14 I would suggest that this is what is really worrying your BF's mother and your own parents. The age difference and maturity difference is just too much. And you know what? I think they're right. So prepare yourself to live without this fella for quite a while. Link to post Share on other sites
wiseOLDman Posted December 1, 2003 Share Posted December 1, 2003 SoleMate hit the nail on the head. It's the fact that any responsible parent would NOT encourage a relationship between their 18-year old son and a 14-year old girl. Your response to me on this would be a resounding "but I'm mature for my age." Hogwash. You're "jail bait" and I don't mean that to be nasty or prejudge you. In most states, intimate relations between an 18yo and a 14yo is illegal and the 18yo parent's have his best interests in mind. Whether or not you've been intimate with Joe, they did the responsible thing and spoke with your parents about their feelings. If, on the other hand, your parents want to encourage your relationship with this "man," they should have their heads examined. Sorry, that's tough love baby. Link to post Share on other sites
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