matrix0909 Posted August 4, 2011 Share Posted August 4, 2011 My family has a tradition every 3rd Saturday in September, it just so happens a good friend of my wifes family, their son is getting married. I am planning to forgoing the wedding to attend my family tradition. My wife is mortified and upset. She will be attending with with 5-6 sisters, mother, ect.. Am I making the wrong decision? Based on the distance between the 2 events it is really not possible to attend both for a short period of time. We have considered that already. Link to post Share on other sites
chucksagent Posted August 4, 2011 Share Posted August 4, 2011 I have to admit...this is a TOUGH one... Some people would have you believe that in situations like this - the answer is SIMPLE - you each go to your different committments. BUT I would tell you different...I would tell you that I am of the belief that a husband and wife are a team - a package deal. You go to EVENTS such as these TOGETHER. So the question becomes, as a team (business, partnerships, etc.) which of the two options DESERVES your attention more. Now - if it were your wifes SISTER, BROTHER, BEST FRIEND, maybe even niece or nephew getting married; I would say your TEAM obligation belongs to the wedding. But for crying out loud!!! This is a FAMILY friend's - - - wait for it - - - SON! He probably could CARE LESS if you guys are there. If anything, all he will care about is the money. Send a card with $100-$200 depending on where you live and your profession (LOL) and ALL will be well. TRUST ME! There will be NO hard feelings. Family ALWAYS comes first. Your once per year get together in September is a FAMILY obligation. Just because your wifes FAMILY is going to this wedding, does not make THE WEDDING ITSELF, a family oglibation. Tell your wife sincerely that if this was a member of HER FAMILIES wedding (heck, MAYBE even the family friend him or her self {if they are VERY close with the family} things would be different. But an OFFSPRING of the FRIEND is BARELY a connection. I am putting my Moms best friend in place of this person to apply it to me. I may be like "oh too bad would have been nice to see you" but when you get older youre rarely as close as when you were a kid. AND there will be MORE than enough CLOSER people to me there that will need to be entertained regardless. Put it to your wife this way and tell her this date is VERY important to you and your family, and since SHE is now part of your family, the 3rd weekend in September event should EASILY have priority. I will go so far as to say if her family is REASONABLE they will TOTALLY understand...and if they don't than that's on them, not on you and your wife. Link to post Share on other sites
creighton0123 Posted August 4, 2011 Share Posted August 4, 2011 My family has a tradition every 3rd Saturday in September, it just so happens a good friend of my wifes family, their son is getting married. I am planning to forgoing the wedding to attend my family tradition. My wife is mortified and upset. She will be attending with with 5-6 sisters, mother, ect.. Am I making the wrong decision? Based on the distance between the 2 events it is really not possible to attend both for a short period of time. We have considered that already. Would the tradition be sacrificed if it were moved to the 2nd Saturday in September? IMO, I'd choose the spouse. You have to go home with her. Link to post Share on other sites
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