yes Posted August 3, 2002 Share Posted August 3, 2002 does anyone else find it annoying that our culture is so full of double standards? why do guys sleep around no problem, but girls sleep around and get labeled sluts? why are girls supposed to only have sex if they're in love, yet guys will screw anyone they can get a hold of and not be blamed? i think love n sex are way too intertwined in our society im a gal, and if i see an attractive guy, why on earth can't i sleep w/ him w/out any consequences? men might say they dont care, but few will marry experienced girls with an extensive sexual past. is it all just the influence of the judaeo-christian tradition? yikes! i'm a girl, and i've been raised to be a "good girl", who'll stay outta trouble and marry a nice man, yada yada but i'm young now, and i hate seeing guys my age having all that fun, while i'm advised to try r/s with an older man, who'll be ready for committment, yada yada. just ranting, -yes Link to post Share on other sites
liamsac Posted August 3, 2002 Share Posted August 3, 2002 I'm a Man. And I agree about your observations about double standards. My wife and I had several discussions about that. I think the reason why society frowns on women sleeping around and not with men is because of animal instincts. Males have to screw around to spread their progeny. But the male also has to insure that the female he's screwing will only carry HIS progeny. Somehow that directive got hard coded into the brain/psyche/gene/whatever of men and women. I think it's a programming problem. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yes Posted August 3, 2002 Author Share Posted August 3, 2002 i agree that it has to do with natural instincts - like, women are looking for a protector to provide for them and the baby, and men are simply looking to impregnate. however, the nature argument isn't convincing for me because we're so far from nature and animals in other aspects of it - protection (against STDs and pregnancy), monogamy during marriage (RARE in the animal world), the mental part of the relationship (debatable, but not rlly present with animals)... Also, naturally, women should start having sex right after their period comes around - at like 14-15. so come on - we're so far from animals in this subject it's not even funny... -yes Link to post Share on other sites
Ally Boo Posted August 3, 2002 Share Posted August 3, 2002 Yeah and what's up with this? I'm 24, and when I moved back home with my parents for 6 months, I had an 11:00 curfew, but my 22 year old brother (who had to be at work at 4AM) would go out on a Thursday night, go to Walmart after the bars closed to buy a shirt to wear to work, and then go straight to work. And if I came home at Midnight, I got in trouble? Oh and lets keep in mind that I have been married AND divorced....it's not like I've never been out in the world. GRRRRRRRRRRR Yeah and guys DONT want a girl whose been around....it makes them feel like they've had something everyone else has had...like it ruins their trophy status. I don't get it....but I've not slept around for fear of getting social diseases. Oh but let me say this.....WHY DONT GUYS FIGURE OUT HOW TO USE CONDOMS??? Oh and another thing.....DONT GET AN ATTITUDE WITH US WHEN WE TELL YOU TO USE ONE!!!!!!!!!! UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OK I'm better now. LOL Link to post Share on other sites
Author yes Posted August 3, 2002 Author Share Posted August 3, 2002 yes ally, i feel for u ... what upsets me most is that ranting about this is useless. we're part of the society and have to play the game. YIKES so from here, it's a choice between eventually getting together w/ a good man & not sleeping around b4 that VS. being a playgirl for life and just doing whatever the heck i want ... oh - about the trophy ... hmm - i think gals are similar to guys in this respect. when u meet someone, u see fairly quickly if this is someone u could have a meaningful r/s with. so - if not - u go in for a fast kill, and is yes - u take it slow and see if the r/s can happen. the only diff-ce is the fast kill, i think; - guys just try to screw her, and gals just get the guy to ask 'em out, say no, get their ego trip, and move on. i must have some kinda guy psychology, cuz i'd do the guy-style fast kill... but alas - i have to hold back cuz of the freaking dbl-standards. heh heh, -yes Link to post Share on other sites
Author yes Posted August 3, 2002 Author Share Posted August 3, 2002 raw sex is nasty. there's a lady part of me that tells me that. so perhaps after all, the best way is to get a vibrator, and wait for a meaninful r/s - w/out sexual urges getting in the way =) -yes (yes, im having a weird morning ) Link to post Share on other sites
Ally Boo Posted August 3, 2002 Share Posted August 3, 2002 I don't like being with guys who have been with everyone....but that's like impossible to find LOL Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted August 3, 2002 Share Posted August 3, 2002 I haven't been with everyone. There's a gal who lives in Gary, Indiana I've never been with. Waiting for some airline specials to that area..... Link to post Share on other sites
Ally Boo Posted August 3, 2002 Share Posted August 3, 2002 Shame on you, Tony! LOL Link to post Share on other sites
Stormdesire Posted August 4, 2002 Share Posted August 4, 2002 I know its not fare, but what can we do? its just the way it is but i think being a good girl is great, and after everything is said and done i dont think the guys are really having all that much fun, because men who are older now, and have done all that were talking about wind up saying it really wasint worth it, and if they could go back and change things they would !!!!!! So remmember that. Link to post Share on other sites
BiancaRura Posted August 4, 2002 Share Posted August 4, 2002 One of my girl friends tries to pressure me into having sex with more guys. I lost my virginity about 6 years ago and she lost hers about 3 years ago. She has slept with more guys then me and already has a kid. I, one the other hand, do not. She has had about 60 guys "eat her cookie (as she likes to put it)" I feel like its wrong to have a long list or huge number of notches on your headboard. I have been celibate for about 3 years now because I don't like casual sex and I want to have a meaningful relationship before I sleep with the guy I'm dating. P.S. Last Sept, a guy (who I later found out is a womanizer so I guess it was a blessing in disguise) broke things off with me because I wouldn't sleep with him. Link to post Share on other sites
BeReal Posted August 4, 2002 Share Posted August 4, 2002 I'm curious if this is true for all societies and cultures. There must be some places where there isn't such a double standard. France maybe? Link to post Share on other sites
Ally Boo Posted August 4, 2002 Share Posted August 4, 2002 I think that's just nasty. She has a kid to worry about now. I have ZERO respect for a woman who sleeps around....who has a child. First of all, what kinda example is that to your kids? I look back at my childhood, and I can't IMAGINE what it would have been like if my mother had been a whore. I am SO thankful. I mean, she should at least be worrying about her health for her kid's sake...and NOT the number of men she's been with. I feel sorry for that child, and I wish there was a way the governement could intervene and take it away from her, because that is NOT responsible. Link to post Share on other sites
Tessa Posted August 11, 2002 Share Posted August 11, 2002 Sex is sex and we are all human. As humans we have needs. It does not matter if you are a man or a woman. If you want it then go and get it. Simple... Link to post Share on other sites
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