Puzzeling question... Posted December 27, 2001 Share Posted December 27, 2001 My boyfriend who is over 55 told me he never uses condoms because he looses his erection. Apparenly he tried a couple of years ago with his ex-girlfriend, but it didn't work. Whenever we have sex he always pulls out before finishing and we never have any problems. A few days ago when I was at his place alone I looked in his drawer by the bedside (he had asked me to look for something) and I discovered a little bathroom kit which, out of curiosity I unzipped and looked through. In it was lubrication which was no surprize, since we sometimes use it, but another thing that took me off guard was an unopened little pack of three condoms. At first I thought there were probably old ones he never used, but when I looked on the outside wrapper I noticed that there was a www.com address on the back which means these were fairly recent as the internet hasn't been around that long (at least not that long ago they started putting www.com addresses on things you buy) I also discovered two porno films in this bag, but that didn't shock or upset me because I know he watches them sometimes and I don't find this offensive. The thing that worries me is the condoms. Could it be that he lied about not being able to wear them so I would think he never cheats on me? Is this a common "cheating" device older men use??? Link to post Share on other sites
Laurynn Posted December 27, 2001 Share Posted December 27, 2001 Well first of all, if having him 'pull out' is the method of birth control you 2 are using, you're at high risk for getting pregnant. Were you not aware of this? The "withdrawal method" is an extremely ineffective/risky form.....there are 'swimmers' (sperm) in the pre-ejaculate which can easily find their way/get your pregnant. You might consider at least using some kind of spermicide or talking to your doc about trying some form of oral contraception (there are various types of "the Pill")... As for the condoms....I don't see a correlation between him lying about using condoms because he didn't want you to think he cheated. If he DID (does) cheat, I'm sure he'd be smart enough to hide the condoms in the first place..so no, I don't think that proves anything. Just because they have a 'www.com' address on them, I don't think that proves they're fairly new. The Internet has been around for at least 5 years that I know of. Was there an 'expiry date' on them?..that would tell more....most have a 1-2 yr expiry, I believe (you could call up a pharmacy and ask them, a pharmacist would know how long condoms are good for)... Are you SURE you were in that drawer because he'd asked you to find something, or were you really just doing a little snooping? If he really DID ask you to look for something, do you think he'd send you to a drawer where you'd surely find questionable 'evidence'? I wouldn't think so. Personally, if he doesn't want to use condoms, I'd be asking him to go and get tested for HIV and Sexually Transmitted Diseases...cuz if he doesn't want to use them with you, who else in his past has he not wanted to use them with? Things like HIV and Hepatitis C are nothing to fool with..and you (or I, or anyone who's sleeping with anyone) have no idea who he's slept with/who THEY slept with, and so on and so on... Do you have a sense that perhaps he's not being straight with you/that he's been cheating? Are you by any chance the gal who'd written in the past who wanted to know how to go about installing hidden video cameras in her boyfriend's place to see if he's been up to no good? L Link to post Share on other sites
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