saying the word no,very difficult situation

[Patty]

.

 

My friend came over for the weekend.Well I guess I cant really call her much of a friend.I give so much I just find it hard to say no,I guess it has come a bad habit now its time that I must start saying no to this friend .When I say no the worse thing that could happen is she will get mad and slam stuff around.

 

Yesterday she was getting bored and suggested we go out shopping,I said "no cause I have to much to pay for bills and so on" Then every time she says"well I dnt have a job either" I said "well that doesnt mean you should use up my money every week either". When I try to explain to her my needs she gets very upset .She only sees her own.Im tired of it.Just because she has no job she expects me to pay for the ride to the next town ,I said to her "dont you realize "you are wearing down my money" shes says every week "well I dont have a job" Then she lost it we started fighting verbaly and couldnt get anywhere with her.I said lets wait untill my mother gets back that way we can both ride for free.But she wanted to go right that minute.I was getting nervous cause she was talking real loud and when shes mad ,shes mad.And she slams stuff around when shes mad.

 

I feel like I have to do everything cause she dont have a job.She takes her moods out on me .I cant stand it.I bought 2 large pizzas this weekend and had it delivered.If I dont say no I feel awful but the again I feel so stressed.Where do I start or I should I feel this way?

[sparkle]

DO NOT LET HER COME OVER ANYMORE.

 

STOP HANGING OUT WITH HER.

 

PERIOD.

[Tony T]

It seems you have been having these kinds of problems with her for a while now.

 

It's no longer her fault, it's yours. I no longer consider her selfish, I consider you incapable of being assertive and ridding your life of leaches and freeloaders.

 

She is NOT your friend. Do what sparkle said.

[Patty]

It seems you have been having these kinds of problems with her for a while now. It's no longer her fault, it's yours. I no longer consider her selfish, I consider you incapable of being assertive and ridding your life of leaches and freeloaders. She is NOT your friend. Do what sparkle said.

As usual everything ends up my fault thanks for the kind words.At least I did try.

[Tony T]

YOU WRITE: "At least I did try."

 

You tried what??? You need to tell this girl to get out of your life.

 

Stop being a victim. Yes, if you continue to lay down and let friends walk all over you, you bet your life it's your fault.

 

Stop making the mistakes. When people begin to take advantage of you, let them know how you feel. If they don't stop, disassociate yourself with them. If they won't leave, call the police.

 

Your happiness is your responsiblity. What people do to you is their fault, what you allow them to continue doing to you is YOUR fault...and stop feeling sorry for yourself and start getting assertive.

 

Be nice but don't allow yourself to be walked on.

[Patty]

I meant I tried telling her no.When she calls I can always tell her im going to be busy.

YOU WRITE: "At least I did try."

 

You tried what??? You need to tell this girl to get out of your life. Stop being a victim. Yes, if you continue to lay down and let friends walk all over you, you bet your life it's your fault. Stop making the mistakes. When people begin to take advantage of you, let them know how you feel. If they don't stop, disassociate yourself with them. If they won't leave, call the police.

 

Your happiness is your responsiblity. What people do to you is their fault, what you allow them to continue doing to you is YOUR fault...and stop feeling sorry for yourself and start getting assertive. Be nice but don't allow yourself to be walked on.