POTTY TRAINING ...please help

[dixiepix]

I have a son who will be 3 the end of July. We began potty training in January and he picked up on it quickly. He still uses a diaper but only at bedtime. The problem lies in the fact that he will not poop in the potty. While potty training he would bring me a diaper if he had to poop. Once he was comfortable with the liquid part of potty training, I quit putting a diaper on him when he brought it to me. I would tell him he had to poop in the toilet like a big boy. Since he gets a diaper at bedtime, now he'll wait until he gets his diaper on...and I mean in 60 seconds flat...needs a new diaper. Any suggestions out there how to teach him to do this in the toilet?

[iamtastee]

Well...at least you have the pee-I have NEITHER! My beautiful daughter will be three in December and refuses to use the potty. She sits on it,but never uses it. She knows the concept,she just refuses. I've tried everything and i'm at my wits end. If you find a solution,please let me know!!

[misty123]

Have you guys tried the potty book. I do not know the name would have to check back in later with the name and author. My daughter turns 2 in a couple of weeks and I have started her off on that book it seems to be an impovement she will sit there for longer that most other times if she has that book. She still will not do anything but I dont expecter her too. But with this book she has taken more of an intrest for using her potty other than a step stool. lol Could you ladies give me any tips since this is my first time and have no clue where to start. At least you have started....

 

Hope to check in with the name of the book.

[Matilda]

Peeing in the potty, but not pooping in it, is a common problem during potty training. Your son is still really young, so I think I would give some more time to see if he might decide to start pooping on the potty on his own. My daughter, who is now 11, used to wait until I put a diaper on her at night to poop, but at some point, around the age of 3, she just decided to do it on her own.

 

I would make sure he has opportunities to see others have BM's on the toilet, so he knows it's not a scary thing for others. Sometimes videos can be helpful. Maybe being around when a child a little bit older than him goes, would be helpful too. He wouldn't have to actually be in the bathroom with the child, but after the child comes out of the bathroom, everyone could praise that child for having a BM on the toilet. ("Oh, you're such a big boy/girl now that you can poop on the potty.")

 

Another approach is bribery, tell him that when he does go on the potty that you will buy him something special, or do something special. Just so that he will go on the potty and realize that it is not scary. Once he goes one time, I don't think you will have trouble getting him to go again, unless he has a bad experience like trying to pass a hard stool.

 

If after you have given him a few more months, and he still isn't inclined to go on the toilet, then I would start things like making him at least be in the bathroom when he poops in his diaper. Also, have him sit on the potty at other times during the day, with his clothes on, to get used to sitting there, and gradually move up to sitting with pants off. Then, make him sit on the potty with diaper on to have a BM. And then hopefully, he will be able to make the transition to actually doing it. During this process, you will want to give him lots of praise and encouragement, and some little rewards, like a sticker chart, or small toy.

 

You never want to be negative or punishing about not having BM's in the potty. The problem is that some children, begin holding their stools, and then develop problems with very hard stools, which can even lead to anal fissures or a condition called encopresis. If you run into any of these kinds of problems, it is definitely time to enlist the help of your pediatrician.

 

But, like I said to begin with, if it were me, I would give him a little more time. It does not sound like this will intefere with preschool or anything like that, if you are considering it, since he is having his BM's at night. I would just keep gently encouraging him to try the potty, and make sure he is aware that everyone else does their BM's in the potty.

 

Here are a couple of relevant links:

http://familyfun.go.com/parenting/child/dev/expert/dony67fatoilet/dony67fatoilet.html

 

http://familyfun.go.com/parenting/child/dev/expert/dony99farefusal/dony99farefusal.html

[brashgal]

I recommend having other kids around the same age who are potty-trained visit - this influenced both my sons. Bribery was also quite successful. Although we tried on and off for a year, both kids finally got the idea and we're totally trained within a week without accidents so it seems to be that they do so when they are ready. Both boys were over 3, close to 3-1/2.

[tiki]

My son went thru the same thing. I explained how dirty it was to poop in your pants. He knew it smelled bad. He was about your son's age. He also had a major prob with constipation. I told him that wiping wouldn't be so painful if he pooped in the potty (vs in his diaper). It came overnight. It was like a miracle...and he never went back. We're accident free since he's been trained! He'll be 4 this month. Don't give up!

[mrs.sarah]

I went to the store and bought a bunch of inexpensive toys. I put them on top of the refridgerator. When my daughter would use the toilet she would get to pick out a toy. This worked great.

My daughter was fully potty trained just before she turned 3.

 

As for pooping, when your son poops in the diaper, dump it from the diaper to the potty each time. That worked for one of my friends.

 

Good luck!

[lnichols]

I don't know why, but boys seem not to be as bothered about potty training as girls. I think girls want to please more. Anyway, when my oldest was training, he has the same deal. Just when I was about to think he'd go to college in diapers, the little light went on! He went into the bathroom and shut the door. Every time I peeked in, he waved me away. He sat on the toilet, then on the potty chair, back and forth. When he came out, he'd pooped in in the potty! I was so proud, I called his dad at work. And he never had another accident again, even in his sleep. He was 3 days from his third birthday. I think that kids will use the potty when they are ready, with occasional accidents. There's hope. Hand on there.

[lnichols]

Oh, and another thing I did is I did away with diapers except at night. I didn't use pull-ups, either. Those are still diapers. I think that as long as a child has that diaper feel, it is telling him or her that it is acceptable to wet or soil. I used training pants and plastic pants over that. It was a pain to clean up for me, but I just kept telling him that he didn't need diapers anymore during the day. That he was too big for that. Wearing underpants also makes it less comfortable to wet or soil. It it wet and cold and yucky. Kids don't like that feeling. Diapers these days are soft and absorbent, like you never even went! Keep it up! He'll get it. Reward him like crazy when he does.

[Thor]

I have nothing really useful to tell you except to give it some more time. That and try to be positive when he pees in the potty, but don't scold him or show disconcern when he doesn't poop in the potty. Too much pressure would seem to counter the training. My ex and I did that with our oldest and she was trained by 3. We're now working on our 2 year old and she seems to be doing well so far. Every child is different.

[HokeyReligions]

My daughter caught on quick, my son took a bit longer. With both of them I had them sit on the potty with their diapers on and we went from that to dumping the poo into the potty (from the diaper) and then when they started going on their own I moved to training pants. Always got rewards when they did good. Training my son to actually hit the target (after he was too big for a potty chair) was impossible. Heck, my husband still misses! And I even bought paper submarines/boats that float in the toilet bowl for then to 'shoot' at when they pee!