Moose Posted June 4, 2004 Share Posted June 4, 2004 I don't understand it. It's like they have no common sense at all!!! I have 5 kids and every single one of them like to destroy my property. Now, I mean our property really....they slam the back door, crawl out of windows, color on everything, one even shattered our living room window and laughed about it, ( At least that's what his brother said), they leave brand new bikes out by the road in the weather, sliced the trampoline with his pocket knife, they don't have a single board game that the box and all the pieces are together. I know what you're thinking, where are you and their Mother this whole time while this is going on????? Weeellllll, I work the regular 8-5 shift at my office then I weld in the mine two nights out of the week, then I weld on the weekends at another shop.....needless to say....I'm a busy fella. My wife is pretty busy too, no she doesn't work, but she is really tight with her Mom and Sister-in-law. She's helps them out quite a bit and I don't complain. I mean come on!!!! The oldest is 16, then 14, then on down to 6 yrs old. They can all walk, talk, reason and have the capabilities to take care of things. When told to do their chores they complain, "What am I getting out of this????", of course I come back with a roof over your head, food in your gut, clothes on your back...yada...yada.....they are disrespectful and mouthy. I have given lecture after lecture of how it should be.... I even made my fourteen year old answer me, "Yes Sir, No Sir" for a week...( The little kids picked it up and think it's cool ), even with all this, I'm still struggling.... Does anyone have any better ideas? Thanks!! Moose Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted June 5, 2004 Share Posted June 5, 2004 If they don't see clear consequences to their deeds, they will continue uncontrolled. I hope you don't replace their belongings when they are wrecked. They need to know what is unacceptable and they need to have it backed up by action. If the bikes aren't taken care of, take them away. Tell them once that they will lose the item if it's not cared for - and then FOLLOW UP. The one who sliced up the trampoline loses one of his prized possessions. Until you teach them that what they do bears consequences, they will never get it. Link to post Share on other sites
Pyrannaste Posted June 5, 2004 Share Posted June 5, 2004 Moimeme's advice is excellent. I also suggest, when you give the a chore that is not too hard, don't allow them to go out to meet their friends until they have finished it. Do they get pocket money? If so, take away something from their pocket money for each chore they ignore. Or if they break a window have them rebuy it with their pocket money. If they paint /write on the walls, set them to work with a can of paint and a brush. Link to post Share on other sites
Matilda Posted June 5, 2004 Share Posted June 5, 2004 I agree that there are not enough consequences for what they do. They should only have "priveleges" when they do the things they are supposed to do. If they don't do the chores, then they don't get to watch TV, use the computer, use the car, ride their bikes, play with toys, go outside, or whatever it is they want to do. There is a really good book called "The Power of Positive Parenting" that I have found very helpful. It is based on the behavioral principles of positive reinforcement. http://www.parentrx.com/principles/ Link to post Share on other sites
Author Moose Posted June 7, 2004 Author Share Posted June 7, 2004 Thanks guys, I was really hoping for a common sense pill I could sneak in their mac and cheese.....but since that doesn't exist, ( Yet ), Looks like it's up to good ole fashion discipline..... Thanks Again Link to post Share on other sites
mrs.sarah Posted June 9, 2004 Share Posted June 9, 2004 Here's what I would do: Take the pocket knife away from the kid that sliced the trampoline. Don't buy them anything more if they continue to destroy things. Start taking privleges away from them. Tell them they need to do chores and earn money for the things they want. When someone has to work for something, they seem to appreciate it more than if it's given to them. Good luck. I hope they stop destroying things. It must be frustraing. Link to post Share on other sites
She's Come Undone Posted June 9, 2004 Share Posted June 9, 2004 Yeah, I still harbor resentment and anger towards my parents who thought we were old enough to be left alone at 12 and 14... Find the time to spend with them, they'll stop acting out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Moose Posted June 9, 2004 Author Share Posted June 9, 2004 Thanks for the advice, my kids act like it's a death sentence when I tell them to do chores. And I don't give them an allowance......they get free food, clothing and shelter for that. I will try to come up with extras to pay them for....but it's like pulling teeth to get them to do much. As far as leaving them alone, she's come undone, we never usually do, I spend plenty of time together with them....they are just destructive little clin-ons. I even have a week of camping lined up this summer, all brand new gear and the works...I'm really a good daddy, they are just spoiled and I need to somehow reverse that. Thanks for sharing though. Moose Link to post Share on other sites
She's Come Undone Posted June 9, 2004 Share Posted June 9, 2004 In that case, just beat their little *sses!! LOL Link to post Share on other sites
shortbus74 Posted June 10, 2004 Share Posted June 10, 2004 My mom used to tell my sister and I that she could not own anything nice until we moved out.... Kid= destruction!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Moose Posted June 10, 2004 Author Share Posted June 10, 2004 Shortbus, That's so funny, I was just telling my wife that WE can't have anything nice until all the kids move out!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
shortbus74 Posted June 10, 2004 Share Posted June 10, 2004 thank you! Link to post Share on other sites
asiamarie Posted June 16, 2004 Share Posted June 16, 2004 I don't have an answer to that one because i have three children of my own and i don't have a d*m thing left either. so if you find good answers on what to do i could use them too. I just bought a 1000 dollar entertainment center back in march of this year and its already destroyed because of my three year old son likes to destroy things he opened up the glass door and slammed it hard and it shattered good thing he was all right but he sure did get a good one from his dad. I also have crayon marks all over my walls, because my son would get up early in the mornings and get into his sisters crayon and marker boxes and writes all over the walls. I found out spankens don't work for me and either does time out. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts