JT2015 Posted September 6, 2015 Posted September 6, 2015 Hope to get some good feedback on my problem. In short, I've been married for 13 years and only have one child (he's only 2). Problem is since the beginning my marriage has always been a one sided family affair. My wife only socialise with her side and she despises my side (to a point of telling my mum she can't raise her own children). My wife side is controlling my wife and is constantly taking stabs at me ... and she knows this but take their side rather than mine. This has been going on since day one. It's safe to say that our marriage is over for a long shot. And i'm basically living for my son. I just wanted to know what is the best way forward, keeping in mind that I really don't want to mess up my son's life.
d0nnivain Posted September 6, 2015 Posted September 6, 2015 Short term take your son to see your side without your wife. Long term, marriage counseling. If your wife doesn't change, you have to think long & hard about what message you are showing your son by staying. 1
Author JT2015 Posted September 6, 2015 Author Posted September 6, 2015 I've been taking my son to my side without my wife, but not as regularly as I'd like. Feeding and sleeping schedule doesn't really allow much time to go out. But I hope to increase in this coming year. Marriage counselling isn't on the cards as she has her family to counsel her. The only way is to move house far away to her side as possible, to decrease interaction. What do you mean by what message I'm showing to my son by staying?
d0nnivain Posted September 6, 2015 Posted September 6, 2015 Your son will observe the family dynamic as he grows up. He will learn bullying & he will never see marriage as a partnership because yours is not. You have to make her see that MC is the answer because her getting "counsel" from her family is destroying your marriage & possibly hurting your child. She has to put her primary family ahead of her family of origin.
Author JT2015 Posted September 6, 2015 Author Posted September 6, 2015 Thanks, I see what you mean now and it's a strong point as well. She is living her family's lifestyle and life. Sad to say but the only way she will see her primary family ahead is if one of her parent cease to exist (she's listens to her mum more, so i'd say her mum) which will then give her no choice but to function 'normally' and the brainwash would stop.
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