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Mom is making vacation and life miserable

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Old 30th December 2014, 2:41 PM   #1
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Mom is making vacation and life miserable

My father died a few years ago and I'm an only child. I'm a 20 something living with my mom, paying several hundred a month to her for rent etc and paying my own bills. I'm going back to school in the summer to get my masters in teaching special ed. Money is an issue for both of us, but we go on an annual mother/daughter road trip to California during Christmas. We are here now and a large part of the time she's basically been hell on wheels. We bring a lot of clothes, Christmas stuff, and food etc. On the trip. It's a mutual decision but she spends time fussing about the room looking perfectly, doing laundry, cleaning etc. I wouldn't mind doing this stuff for a short time, but this my one vacation a year and I worked three jobs to get the money to come here. This year I'm paying for the majority of the trip for both of us. I'm not resentful of the money but of her complaining and ruining our time at Disneyland, out for nice meals, even in the hotel. She is crabby and fussing all the time. What can I do to get along with her better and enjoy the remainder of the vacation?
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Old 30th December 2014, 3:29 PM   #2
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It's hard to do these vacations especially since you're living together. I think the aggravation is coming from spending too much time around one another and this vacation was probably a bad idea since you're living together right now. The vacation probably should have been spent away from your mom. Anyways, try to humor her and let things go in one ear, out the other. I know it is hard, but keep discussions to a minimum. If you're still living with mom next year, I would advise against travelling together.
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Old 3rd January 2015, 4:07 PM   #3
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I have to agree quite a bit with the previous responder. I lived with my mother until I was 24 years old. When I moved out, it was super sad for a good year. Now, when I go back, even if it's for a 2-3 day weekend....GAHHH!!! It's like...."how did I live with these people for so long?!".

Although planning the annual trip was probably a wonderful idea in the beginning, it may be time to re-evaluate future plans. Maybe grab a girlfriend of yours and go off with her, and same for mom.

As for the time being (not sure if you're still vacationing at this point), maybe try 'n do the things she wants to do for the rest of the trip. Let her steer til you come back home.
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