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I have been married for 6 years. My wife started school and we worked opposite days/hours for the first 3 years. So, we never saw each other and sex was sporadic.

After she finished school 3 years ago, we had a son together and she hit a huge postpartum depression. For the last 3 years, she has slept in a twin bed with my son and never came to bed with me. We would go months without any type of sex or intimacy of any sort.

Through all of this I became pretty angry and bitter. I eventually moved out last October.

I love my wife more than any other woman ever. She's the love of my life. It is very difficult when I am married to a woman who has no interest in sex and it's more of a chore to her than anything else. I don't understand it because I am the only man to ever give her the big "O". She never had one before me.

I have been completely open and faithful to her. I HAVE had women bluntly ask me to come over and have sex. I haven't gone that way though!

What am I supposed to do now that my wife and I are actually on speaking terms but she tells me on a regular basis that she has no interest in sex, intimacy, or counseling?

We tried counseling last year and she stopped showing up because the counselor kept asking her why she wasn't making any effort here.

I don't want a divorce, but I am not sure how much longer I can hold on to a person who loves me but doesn't want to be intimate in any way.

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It's done. Over. It will never change. Move on.

 

Very possible she has a guy on the side, especially since you two didn't see much of each other during the first years. Are you sure the child is yours?

Edited by Frank13
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I am 100% positive that there's nobody else on her end. She has no interest in anything, has gained about 40lbs and never even tries to look good anymore. She honestly hates herself. I can compliment her all day and she constantly puts herself down. She won't accept a compliment from anybody. "Whatever, I'm fat, I'm ugly".......It's the most frustrating thing in the world. Her depression is awful but she refuses to get help for it.

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