mango600 Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Is Facebook spying on my ex a violation of no contact even if I am not talking to them? Why or why not? Will I miss out on healing effects of NC if I check their Facebook page once a week? Is it illegal? Link to post Share on other sites
dpass Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 As in a legal order of no contact? Or regular no contact after a breakup? After a breakup, yes it will make it harder to move on. You need to stop thinking about them, only then have you moved on. Legally, that would depend on the order though I don't think anything could stop someone from looking at things that are publicly on the internet. Link to post Share on other sites
Author mango600 Posted December 30, 2016 Author Share Posted December 30, 2016 I guess I should consult a lawyer about the legal aspects of Facebook spying. A lawyer who is objective and unbiased. Link to post Share on other sites
dklaw Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Why are you spying on someone? That's creepy and unhealthy. If you are hacking into their account, then yes that is illegal. Link to post Share on other sites
bluefeather Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 If you spy on their fb, then it is not NC. NC is nothing at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Blanco Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 In my experiences, checking on their online presence was often as damaging to me as any actual interactions with them. They cannot become a part of your past if you're keeping tabs on them. Release them in all regards until you get to a point where seeing a photo of them would be like seeing a ghost. Link to post Share on other sites
LargoLagg Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Is Facebook spying on my ex a violation of no contact even if I am not talking to them? Why or why not? Will I miss out on healing effects of NC if I check their Facebook page once a week? Is it illegal?What is Facebook "spying"? Do you mean looking at somebody's public Facebook? That's not really spying, because, you know, Facebook stuff is put out there for all the world to see. Looking at FB certainly isn't illegal. All you're really doing is increasing the number of ways this person stays in your mind. NC is really cutting yourself off; looking at Facebook, viewing texts, taking phone calls, "accidentally" showing up in a place you know you'll see this person, talking to the ex's friends or parents or whatever else you might do, these are all lifelines you might use to keep yourself connected. So don't kid yourself. There's a part of you that wants to stay in touch. We all know that feeling. The only question is whether you have the self-discipline to resist it. Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted December 30, 2016 Share Posted December 30, 2016 Here's the thing. No Contact is a tool to allow you to heal, and move on with your life. If you do things that keep them at the forefront of your mind, then it takes away the effectiveness of no contact. I went through this, first went totally NC, but then I would pass him on the street - mental set back, put him right back on my mind. Then I did something stupid, checked his Facebook - new pictures of him to put him back on the forefront of my mind. No Contact needs to include not looking them up, not checking any of their social media etc. Link to post Share on other sites
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